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Off Topic :
I think my daughter is going to die

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 GoldenR (original poster member #54778) posted at 3:10 PM on Tuesday, July 26th, 2022

My daughter Cayce (pronounced like "Casey") is hospitalized. Shes 30 and has been a lifelong heart patient. A couple weeks ago she was having pain from an ovarian cyst. She got sick from it, ran fever and threw up quite a bit. This is normal for her a couple times a year. However this time she kept getting worse until she went to the ER Wednesday evening and a blood test revealed the worst infection they had literally ever had in that hospital.

I went up there and she looked bad. Her mouth was purple and every breath looked like it was a struggle. I thought she was going to die. She was put in the ICU. The thinking was that her cyst had created an abcess that got infected. They were sure they needed needed to do surgery but they had to bring the infection down first. They ran all kinds of tests and did an echo since she's a heart patient.

Blood culture finally Friday afternoon revealed that she had strep. By the strangest of coincidences when she was having the cyst pain, she caught strep. She thought her throat hurt from all of the throwing up she was doing. So the strep was left untreated for so long that it got into her bloodstream.

So now the infection has spread to her heart. She was transferred via ambulance to St David's Hospital in Austin Friday night. Once they get her infection under control, she will require another open heart surgery (her 6th).

So the surgery will:

- replace her aluminum valve with a new one bc it is full of what they call "infected vegetation" which there is no getting rid of it in an artificial valve

- replace her pacemaker bc it is infected and has actually stopped working

I had no clue that metal could get an infection.

A lot of complications have arisen...

From having so many cardiac caths over the years, her right leg artery is blown. So they won't be able to use the heart lung machine on her which means they'll have to ice her down and operate on her while she is packed with ice (read: dead) for like 20 minutes at a time.

Also there is so much scar tissue where the pacemaker goes they'll have to actually remove some to put the new one in. They say it's not unheard of but they've never had to do it before and it's very risky for infections and bleeding.

To top it off she's on blood thinner which complicates everything to another level bc they'll have to take her off of it to do surgery and then hope to high heaven no blood clots form in the aluminum valve over the time that it takes for her to completely stop bleeding after the surgery. Only then will they restart her on blood thinner.

She told me that first night in the ER that she thought her luck had run out. She asked if we would help her man raise her 7 year old boy after she was gone. He himself is somewhat of a miracle child as my daughter was always told a pregnancy would kill her. Somehow she got pregnant while on bc. Was advised pregnancy offered an over 50% chance of death. She went through with it. Literally almost died 3 times during the pregnancy, and wound up with the sweetest little boy.

So surgery will happen once the infection is at a safe level.

Anyway, I'm losing my mind...

Thanks for listening.

[This message edited by GoldenR at 3:12 PM, Tuesday, July 26th]

posts: 2723   ·   registered: Aug. 22nd, 2016   ·   location: South Texas
id 8747263
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JustDone ( member #9742) posted at 3:42 PM on Tuesday, July 26th, 2022

I'm very very sorry, GoldenR, and just prayed for your daughter.

Madhatter
Forgiveness is giving up the possibility of a better past.

posts: 3058   ·   registered: Feb. 12th, 2006
id 8747268
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DragnHeart ( member #32122) posted at 3:43 PM on Tuesday, July 26th, 2022

I'm sorry she's going through this. How very stressful for you. Sending healing MOJO and prayers for you, her and all of your family.

Me: BS 46 WH: 37 (BrokenHeart911)Four little dragons. Met 2006. Married 2008. Dday of LTPA with co worker October 19th 2010. Knew about EA with ow1 before that. Now up to PA #5. Serial fucking Cheater.

posts: 24508   ·   registered: May. 10th, 2011   ·   location: Canada
id 8747269
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JustDone ( member #9742) posted at 3:48 PM on Tuesday, July 26th, 2022

I wish there was something more I could do. If you want to talk to someone, please pm me and I'll send you my phone number. Sending love and hugs and prayers to you, too.

[This message edited by JustDone at 3:52 PM, Tuesday, July 26th]

Madhatter
Forgiveness is giving up the possibility of a better past.

posts: 3058   ·   registered: Feb. 12th, 2006
id 8747270
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sisoon ( Moderator #31240) posted at 4:12 PM on Tuesday, July 26th, 2022

Sending mojo, GR. I'm sorry your daughter and you, and the rest of her family are going through this.

fBH (me) - on d-day: 66, Married 43, together 45, same sex ap
DDay - 12/22/2010
Recover'd and R'ed
You don't have to like your boundaries. You just have to set and enforce them.

posts: 27424   ·   registered: Feb. 18th, 2011   ·   location: Illinois
id 8747276
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tushnurse ( member #21101) posted at 6:03 PM on Tuesday, July 26th, 2022

Sending healing Mojo your way.
I cannot imagine how scary and overwhelming this must be for you.

Make sure you are taking time to care for yourself too.

Me: FBS
Him: FWS
Kids: 22 & 25
Married for 30 years now, was 16 at the time.
D-Day Sept 26 2008
R'd in about 2 years. Old Vet now.

posts: 19420   ·   registered: Oct. 1st, 2008   ·   location: St. Louis
id 8747290
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HFSSC ( member #33338) posted at 6:25 PM on Tuesday, July 26th, 2022

Prayers for your daughter and for you.

In case a little bit of information helps you to understand and that helps you not worry as much, I'll try to explain the vegetation on the mechanical valve. Bacteria do not like to be floating around the blood stream alone. They really like to find somewhere they can hang around together and multiply. Anytime there is something artificial in the body or an irregular spot (such as a leaking heart valve) the bacteria grab hold and form a little community, or vegetation. Once that happens, there is potential for all sorts of nastiness because if the vegetation breaks loose it can then be shot out of the heart to other areas.

This is why people with joint replacements are advised to take antibiotics before dental work because dental infections account for a significant portion of vegetations to heart and other areas.

Again, my prayers are up for Cayce and for your whole family who love her.

Me, 54
Him, 45 (JMSSC)
Married 24 years. Reconciled.

posts: 4748   ·   registered: Sep. 12th, 2011   ·   location: South Carolina
id 8747296
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zebra25 ( member #29431) posted at 7:12 PM on Tuesday, July 26th, 2022

Praying for Cayce and family.

"Don't let anyone who hasn't been in your shoes tell you how to tie your laces."

D-day April 2010

posts: 2865   ·   registered: Aug. 25th, 2010
id 8747304
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WhatsRight ( member #35417) posted at 7:49 PM on Tuesday, July 26th, 2022

Oh my God!

I am so very sorry and saddened to hear about your daughter. When I read the title of your topic my heart stopped for a second. Then I kept reading and I kept reading and bless her heart, and bless your heart. So many different things to be concerned about.

You both seem so strong, and I know you will get through this. I just pray that she will have an absolutely miraculous recovery.

As tush said, please remember that you’ll be focusing all of your attention on her, and it will be hard to feel that it’s important to care for yourself. But of course you have to, because she will be counting on you.

You both will be in my prayers. ❤️

"Noone can make you feel inferior without your concent." Eleanor Roosevelt

I will not be vanquished. Rose Kennedy

posts: 7542   ·   registered: Apr. 23rd, 2012   ·   location: Southeast USA
id 8747305
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BearlyBreathing ( member #55075) posted at 7:53 PM on Tuesday, July 26th, 2022

I am so sorry Cayce and your whole family are going through this difficult time. Many positive vibes and mojo being sent your way. (((Hugs)))

Me: BS 55 (49 on d-day)Him: WH. 64. D-Day 8/15/2016 LTA. Kinda liking my new life :-)

**horrible typist, lots of edits to correct. :-/ **

posts: 4886   ·   registered: Sep. 10th, 2016   ·   location: Northern CA
id 8747306
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 GoldenR (original poster member #54778) posted at 7:54 PM on Tuesday, July 26th, 2022

Cayce had a stroke at 1210pm central time. It was a MASSIVE stroke and there's a blood clot and a lot of blood on her brain. She has been in surgery now for about 40 minutes, this is to try to get the blood clot out and as much of the blood off her brain as possible.

They told us chances of death are high

I appreciate all the prayers and kind thoughts.

[This message edited by GoldenR at 7:55 PM, Tuesday, July 26th]

posts: 2723   ·   registered: Aug. 22nd, 2016   ·   location: South Texas
id 8747307
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leafields ( member #63517) posted at 8:08 PM on Tuesday, July 26th, 2022

So sorry, GR. Sending prayers and mojo.

Please keep us posted.

BW M 34years, Dday 1: March 2018, Dday 2: August 2019, D final 2/25/21

posts: 1240   ·   registered: Apr. 21st, 2018   ·   location: Washington State
id 8747309
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BearlyBreathing ( member #55075) posted at 8:11 PM on Tuesday, July 26th, 2022

GoldenR— oh my so sorry. thinking of all of you.

Me: BS 55 (49 on d-day)Him: WH. 64. D-Day 8/15/2016 LTA. Kinda liking my new life :-)

**horrible typist, lots of edits to correct. :-/ **

posts: 4886   ·   registered: Sep. 10th, 2016   ·   location: Northern CA
id 8747310
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zebra25 ( member #29431) posted at 8:29 PM on Tuesday, July 26th, 2022

Thinking of you GoldenR. My heart goes out to you.

"Don't let anyone who hasn't been in your shoes tell you how to tie your laces."

D-day April 2010

posts: 2865   ·   registered: Aug. 25th, 2010
id 8747313
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OwningItNow ( member #52288) posted at 8:38 PM on Tuesday, July 26th, 2022

Oh, my god. I am so very sorry. I will pray hard for luck to find her, GoldenR.

me: BS/WSh: WS/BS

Reject the rejector. Do not reject yourself.

posts: 5604   ·   registered: Mar. 16th, 2016   ·   location: Midwest
id 8747314
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WhatsRight ( member #35417) posted at 8:41 PM on Tuesday, July 26th, 2022

🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏

"Noone can make you feel inferior without your concent." Eleanor Roosevelt

I will not be vanquished. Rose Kennedy

posts: 7542   ·   registered: Apr. 23rd, 2012   ·   location: Southeast USA
id 8747316
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Pinkyxo ( member #43095) posted at 9:07 PM on Tuesday, July 26th, 2022

((((GoldenR and Cayce))))
Praying

One foot in front of the other!Member since 2004ish?Formerly ZooMa.

posts: 82   ·   registered: Apr. 13th, 2014   ·   location: Florida :)
id 8747319
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annb ( member #22386) posted at 9:49 PM on Tuesday, July 26th, 2022

I don't have any words, just praying for your daughter and your family.

posts: 11567   ·   registered: Jan. 10th, 2009   ·   location: Northeast
id 8747324
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JustDone ( member #9742) posted at 9:57 PM on Tuesday, July 26th, 2022

Oh no, praying...

Madhatter
Forgiveness is giving up the possibility of a better past.

posts: 3058   ·   registered: Feb. 12th, 2006
id 8747325
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HFSSC ( member #33338) posted at 1:09 AM on Wednesday, July 27th, 2022

I am so sorry. Prayers going up.

Me, 54
Him, 45 (JMSSC)
Married 24 years. Reconciled.

posts: 4748   ·   registered: Sep. 12th, 2011   ·   location: South Carolina
id 8747340
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