Newest Member: Armyman9196

Off Topic :
A new worry

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barcher144 ( member #54935) posted at 6:49 PM on Wednesday, May 5th, 2021

Hey Jeanniegirl... I don't have anything constructive to say about any of this...

But, I'm totally pulling for you!!! You got this!!!

Me: BH, age 48
Her: WS, age 45 (multiple EAs and PAs)
D-Day: August 30, 2016

Diagnosed with depression in December 2016, which was primarily caused by my xWW's affair and associated emotional abuse.

posts: 5120   ·   registered: Aug. 31st, 2016
id 8656894
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 Jeaniegirl (original poster member #6370) posted at 10:12 PM on Wednesday, May 5th, 2021

Thanks, Barcher. This is my first ever major health concern and I'm trying to not be a whiner and a baby about it. Tush said I need a second opinion and I agree. I've been on the phone today trying to get ONE more CT scan before they dig into my lung for a biopsy on Monday. No luck yet. I have great health care insurance but it 'appears' if I demand another CT scan, not ordered by the lung doctor, they don't want to pay for it. They (lung doc's office) DID tell me initially I could have another CT scan on May 3rd. prior to the biopsy next Monday but changed their minds and said I need the biopsy ASAP.

"Because I deserve better"

posts: 2865   ·   registered: Feb. 1st, 2005
id 8656962
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zebra25 ( member #29431) posted at 11:05 PM on Wednesday, May 5th, 2021

Can you go to another doctor who would possibly order the CT?

Good luck Jeanie.

"Don't let anyone who hasn't been in your shoes tell you how to tie your laces."

D-day April 2010

posts: 2467   ·   registered: Aug. 25th, 2010
id 8656974
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thebighurt ( member #34722) posted at 2:04 AM on Thursday, May 6th, 2021

Jeanniegirl, I've been reading this, and am beyond frustrated and even angry for you.

I sometimes think physicians in the US are making decisions based on their own liability.

Wouldn't this mean the doctor would do the scan rather than cut first?? Wouldn't that be the common sense thing to do?

Mojo and positive thoughts to you. And (((Hugs)))

Finding what life could have been....... Why didn't I see it?

posts: 4998   ·   registered: Feb. 3rd, 2012   ·   location: the Other Side
id 8657004
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Countingsheep65 ( member #56000) posted at 6:39 AM on Thursday, May 6th, 2021

Jeannie.....

Waiting for the results of the biopsy is the hardest part.

You will need to keep yourself busy mentally and physically.

When you go in for the results make sure to bring someone with you. (Hopefully they allow it).

I did not do that and was told some not so good news, I don’t remember driving home and a second pair of ears is always best.

Hoping the best for you.

posts: 429   ·   registered: Nov. 11th, 2016
id 8657059
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number4 ( member #62204) posted at 6:01 PM on Thursday, May 6th, 2021

So sorry to read that this is still an unresolved worry for you. I really hope you find some serenity somewhere as you await the tests.

Yes, keep busy, as others have suggested. It's a valuable tool to stop the endless loop of thinking too much about it.

And keep venting here as much as you need to.

Me: BW
Him: WH
Married - 30+ years
Two adult daughters
1st affair: 2005-2007
2nd-4th affairs: 2016-2017
Many assessments/polygraph: no sex addiction
Status: R

posts: 835   ·   registered: Jan. 10th, 2018   ·   location: Southern California
id 8657202
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 Jeaniegirl (original poster member #6370) posted at 6:23 PM on Thursday, May 6th, 2021

Thank you all very much. Only my daughter and sister know about this. I don't like people to worry. That's the independent streak in me. So having all of you to discuss this with is so helpful.

I've been told another CT scan won't be helpful since the spot (or MASS as they are labeling it) showed up on two previous CT scans in March - and was confirmed by the Pet Scan in April. The only 'second opinion' I got was from my long time primary care physician (He has been sent copies of all reports) who took x-rays of my lungs at my request. He could see nothing at all on the lungs. He did urge me to have the biopsy to be sure nothing is wrong but he said he would expect to see a white area show up on x-rays of any spot or mass.

So Monday I will have the biopsy. Then wait.

"Because I deserve better"

posts: 2865   ·   registered: Feb. 1st, 2005
id 8657216
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tushnurse ( member #21101) posted at 7:20 PM on Thursday, May 6th, 2021

If you are truly dead set on getting another CT, there is always away around it....

Go to the ER and complain that you are extremely short of breath, and that you had covid.

They will scan you to rule out a PE. There have been a bazillion and one chest CT's done since last spring, I am convinced. I think some of these PE's would normally have gone unnoticed but he additional issues that seem to go with the Rona make the ED Dr's play it safe and do CTs.

Me: FBS
Him: FWS
Kids: 21 &23
Married for 28 years now, was 16 at the time.
D-Day Sept 26 2008
R'd in about 2 years. Old Vet now.

posts: 18985   ·   registered: Oct. 1st, 2008   ·   location: St. Louis
id 8657232
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 Jeaniegirl (original poster member #6370) posted at 9:28 PM on Thursday, May 6th, 2021

Tushnurse, would you suggest I go to another ER rather than the one where my lung doctor is located? His office is located in the heart/lung hospital complex. The biopsy is scheduled at another hospital on Monday, 100 miles away. If I went to my regular ER, they would call my lung doctor in. Another thing I have noticed is with the portal, all medical people currently involved have access to the portal if they are dealing with me.

The doctor who will do the biopsy is not my regular lung doctor but rather someone that works with him even though he's at the other hospital. IF (big IF, I hope), I have to have any surgery following the biopsy, I've been told my regular lung doctor will do it.

"Because I deserve better"

posts: 2865   ·   registered: Feb. 1st, 2005
id 8657281
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 Jeaniegirl (original poster member #6370) posted at 4:36 AM on Monday, May 10th, 2021

Okay virtual friends -- tomorrow is the day of the biopsy. At 11 a.m. CST send me ALL the positive energy you can muster up.

I will check in as soon as I can.

"Because I deserve better"

posts: 2865   ·   registered: Feb. 1st, 2005
id 8658079
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leafields ( member #63517) posted at 5:28 AM on Monday, May 10th, 2021

Sending mojo. Please keep us posted.

Lea
Me: BW
Married 34 years, 3 DS
DDay #1: March 26, 2018, DDay #2 8/26/2019
Filed for D: 11/16/2020
D Final: 2/25/2021

posts: 669   ·   registered: Apr. 21st, 2018   ·   location: Washington State
id 8658087
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number4 ( member #62204) posted at 6:20 AM on Monday, May 10th, 2021

You will rock this... this time tomorrow, it will be over!

Me: BW
Him: WH
Married - 30+ years
Two adult daughters
1st affair: 2005-2007
2nd-4th affairs: 2016-2017
Many assessments/polygraph: no sex addiction
Status: R

posts: 835   ·   registered: Jan. 10th, 2018   ·   location: Southern California
id 8658091
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The1stWife ( member #58832) posted at 8:56 AM on Monday, May 10th, 2021

Keeping you in my thoughts tomorrow.

Survived two affairs and brink of Divorce. Happily reconciled.

posts: 10736   ·   registered: May. 19th, 2017
id 8658102
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DragnHeart ( member #32122) posted at 10:03 AM on Monday, May 10th, 2021

Sending you mojo positive prayers and huge hugs.

Me: BS 44 nowWH: 35 almost 36 (BrokenHeart911)Four little dragons.Met 2006. Married 2008. Dday of LTPA with co worker October 19th 2010. Knew about EA with ow1 before that.Full disclosure March 8th 2019 four AP's.

posts: 22087   ·   registered: May. 10th, 2011   ·   location: Canada
id 8658103
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zebra25 ( member #29431) posted at 1:17 PM on Monday, May 10th, 2021

Thinking of you and sending positive energy and mojo.

"Don't let anyone who hasn't been in your shoes tell you how to tie your laces."

D-day April 2010

posts: 2467   ·   registered: Aug. 25th, 2010
id 8658123
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ZenMumWalking ( member #25341) posted at 3:27 PM on Monday, May 10th, 2021

You've got it Jeanie -- MOJO!!!

((((Jeaniegirl))))

Me (BS), Him (WH): late-50's
3 DS: 26, 25, 22
M: 30+ (19 1/2 at Dday)
Dday: Dec 2008
Wanted R, not gonna happen
Used to be DeadMumWalking, doing better now

posts: 8408   ·   registered: Aug. 28th, 2009   ·   location: EU
id 8658173
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DragnHeart ( member #32122) posted at 11:53 PM on Monday, May 10th, 2021

Thinking of you and praying everything went smoothly.

Me: BS 44 nowWH: 35 almost 36 (BrokenHeart911)Four little dragons.Met 2006. Married 2008. Dday of LTPA with co worker October 19th 2010. Knew about EA with ow1 before that.Full disclosure March 8th 2019 four AP's.

posts: 22087   ·   registered: May. 10th, 2011   ·   location: Canada
id 8658331
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WhoTheBleep ( member #49504) posted at 12:42 AM on Tuesday, May 11th, 2021

Quite late to this thread, but thinking of you, Jeanie! I hope it went well today and that you are resting..

I believe we have two lives: the one we learn with, and the one we live with after that. --The Natural

posts: 4372   ·   registered: Sep. 6th, 2015   ·   location: USA
id 8658346
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tushnurse ( member #21101) posted at 1:33 PM on Tuesday, May 11th, 2021

Jeanie - check in with us to let us know how you are doing please.

Thinking about you often.

Me: FBS
Him: FWS
Kids: 21 &23
Married for 28 years now, was 16 at the time.
D-Day Sept 26 2008
R'd in about 2 years. Old Vet now.

posts: 18985   ·   registered: Oct. 1st, 2008   ·   location: St. Louis
id 8658435
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humantrampoline ( member #61458) posted at 2:53 PM on Tuesday, May 11th, 2021

Jeanniegirl,

I hope everything went well, and you're doing ok. Wishing you good health.

posts: 397   ·   registered: Nov. 17th, 2017
id 8658454
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