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Reconciliation :
Thankful Thursday

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sisoon ( Guide #31240) posted at 4:29 PM on Thursday, November 11th, 2021

It's been a while since I

ve looked at this thread.

I'm thankful to guitargod for sharing his positive news. That post greeted me when I open this thread, and it just about made my day.

I'm grateful that my health allows me to ride my bike and ... **TMI** smile .

I'm grateful for the food we can put on our table and for the things that we can buy.

I'm grateful for (most of) my upbringing. (Now is right between the time I lost my mom and dad (last year in November and 25 years ago in October), so I'm thinking about them and their innumerable influences on me.) I'm grateful to them especially because they opened me up to seeing life as an adventure, which I still do.

[This message edited by sisoon at 4:30 PM, Thursday, November 11th]

fBH (me) - on d-day: 66, Married 43, together 45, same sex ap
DDay - 12/22/2010
Recover'd and R'ed
You don't have to like your boundaries. You just have to set and enforce them.

posts: 26262   ·   registered: Feb. 18th, 2011   ·   location: Illinois
id 8697982
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Notaboringwife ( member #74302) posted at 5:09 PM on Thursday, November 11th, 2021

I am grateful to have found a new friend during our crisis time as BS'S. Our choices diverged, she divorced, I reconciled. We support one another, and laugh at our life foibles together.

And we had a great supper together last night, just the two of us.

It's your road & yours alone. Others may walk it with you, but no one can walk it for you. Though nobody can go back and make a new beginning... you can start over and make a new ending.

posts: 247   ·   registered: Apr. 24th, 2020
id 8697985
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Tanner ( member #72235) posted at 5:32 PM on Thursday, November 11th, 2021

Wow W2BHA. I love smile story. My W has these beautiful eyes that I’ve always been crazy about. During her A’s the eyes were evil, gone, no feeling at all. After Dday 2 she told everything in her timeline and I believed her, my gut was good, those eyes were back. I was still extremely pissed at her, but the eyes told me everything. This is the first time admitting that here. Can you imagine going back to your JFO thread and saying “I believe her eyes”. No way not me

My Son is showing great progress after surgery. Improved behavior, eating better, and really trying to verbalize more.

Dday Sept 7 2019 working toward R
BH 54 WW 48
M 30 years, 4 kids 2 grown 2 grandkids

posts: 873   ·   registered: Dec. 5th, 2019   ·   location: Texas DFW
id 8697988
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This0is0Fine ( member #72277) posted at 8:53 PM on Thursday, November 11th, 2021

Finally got the vehicle title for the car I inherited from my father (COVID can really delay some types of paperwork!) along with a season pass to the closest mountain for the winter. Will be nice after skipping a season to recover from knee surgery. :)

Love is not a measure of capacity for pain you are willing to endure for your partner.

posts: 1479   ·   registered: Dec. 11th, 2019
id 8698001
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 Want2BHappyAgain (original poster member #45088) posted at 2:22 PM on Thursday, November 18th, 2021

Because of some family issues...it isn't a particularly feel good time in the W2BHA household. But since there is ALWAYS something to be thankful for...I want to Thank God for giving me the strength to be able to do what is best for our loved one...even though my heart is breaking at the same time. I can't imagine the pain they are going through...but I hope I can bring them a little comfort during this very trying time.

A "perfect marriage" is just two imperfect people who refuse to give up on each other.

With God ALL things are possible (Matthew 19:26)

I AM happy again...It CAN happen!!!

From respect comes great love...sassylee

posts: 5633   ·   registered: Oct. 2nd, 2014   ·   location: Southeastern United States
id 8699047
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Tanner ( member #72235) posted at 4:21 PM on Thursday, November 18th, 2021

I’m thankful for some growth in my grown Daughter. She is mid 20’s and life and stress was eating her up. She had become bitter and angry and took it out on everyone but especially my W. In August she got Covid and was hospitalized for 13 days, her healing took a lot longer at her home with home health coming and having to carry oxygen around. My W was there for her the whole time. She is just about fully healed and her near death experience has changed her, for the better. My W and her have a great relationship and spend a lot of time together, going to lunch and shopping. It’s an answered prayer.

Dday Sept 7 2019 working toward R
BH 54 WW 48
M 30 years, 4 kids 2 grown 2 grandkids

posts: 873   ·   registered: Dec. 5th, 2019   ·   location: Texas DFW
id 8699071
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Notaboringwife ( member #74302) posted at 6:09 PM on Thursday, November 18th, 2021

I am grateful to my husband, as after three years he answered my written questions about a specific affair event that was triggering me. He filled in the missing blanks. We also talked, he came clean. He did this without rolling his eyes, or telling me to get over it as he had that very first year of our R even into the second year. We both are changing our views about one another, in positive way. Yea!

It's your road & yours alone. Others may walk it with you, but no one can walk it for you. Though nobody can go back and make a new beginning... you can start over and make a new ending.

posts: 247   ·   registered: Apr. 24th, 2020
id 8699095
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Underserving ( member #72259) posted at 10:14 PM on Thursday, November 18th, 2021

I am thankful for my children and my family. I’m thankful their daddy and I have found a way to work out our shit, even when it has been hard. I started subbing a few weeks ago, and there are so many kids with a troubled home life who have behavioral issues. Not knocking anyone in a single parent household, but today I am thankful that hasn’t been my children’s experience.

BW (32)Found out 3 years post end of AD-day 12-9-19In R

Infidelity brings out the cuss in me. I’m not as foul mouthed in real life. ;)

posts: 732   ·   registered: Dec. 9th, 2019
id 8699133
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humantrampoline ( member #61458) posted at 3:47 PM on Friday, November 19th, 2021

I know I'm a day late and probably a dollar short.

I'm grateful that I will finally be visiting my siblings and nephews and my lovely SIL next week after not seeing them since Covid.

I'm grateful for the Wheel of Time release on Prime. I was a huge fan of the Robert Jordan book series in the 1990s.

posts: 409   ·   registered: Nov. 17th, 2017
id 8699290
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WTAF ( member #79274) posted at 4:54 PM on Friday, November 19th, 2021

I'm also a day late, but feeling thankful. We have a grandbaby coming next year, and I am thrilled!

Also, the H has been reading How to Help Your Spouse Heal From Your Affair and it has sparked some great conversations. We have had some tough discussions, but he sees now that they are necessary. We wish we had heard about this book years ago. It's been eye opening for him, both for our experiences and for looking back at his father's infidelities when he was growing up. I am thankful that we are on a better path, and are pulling up the rug to clean out things that had been swept there.

posts: 75   ·   registered: Aug. 13th, 2021   ·   location: All up in my feelings
id 8699340
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 Want2BHappyAgain (original poster member #45088) posted at 2:20 PM on Thursday, November 25th, 2021

Ooooooooooo...so many AWESOME posts from last week grin !!! I am so HAPPY that your daughter and your wife are doing so well Coozann Tan smile !!

I already wrote about being thankful in the Thanksgiving thread that ISurvivedSoFar started...which is pretty AWESOME...but there is so MUCH to be thankful for that I can share even more on here grin !!

TODAY...I am thankful that the issue with our loved one last week is getting resolved and it looks like things will be going well smile . When our loved ones hurt...WE hurt. But now that things are looking better...I am feeling MUCH better now!

I am also thankful for the delicious SMELLS coming from the kitchen...C'est Bon!!! We will be eating GOOD today...and it is a BLESSING that we have grocery stores now open and stocked for this special day after hurricane Ida nearly destroyed this sweet town I live in. Thanks to so MANY people giving so generously throughout America...there are houses being rebuilt...clothes being donated...and food brought in from all over to help those of us who lost almost everything. THANK YOU AMERICA!!!

I also want to Thank God in this thread too...because I just can't thank Him enough for ALWAYS being there for me smile . What a MIGHTY God I serve!! He is ALWAYS faithful...and He brings justice. THANK YOU GOD!!!

A "perfect marriage" is just two imperfect people who refuse to give up on each other.

With God ALL things are possible (Matthew 19:26)

I AM happy again...It CAN happen!!!

From respect comes great love...sassylee

posts: 5633   ·   registered: Oct. 2nd, 2014   ·   location: Southeastern United States
id 8700128
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Tanner ( member #72235) posted at 2:58 PM on Thursday, November 25th, 2021

Happy Thanksgiving. Looking forward to spending time with family the next couple of days.

Dday Sept 7 2019 working toward R
BH 54 WW 48
M 30 years, 4 kids 2 grown 2 grandkids

posts: 873   ·   registered: Dec. 5th, 2019   ·   location: Texas DFW
id 8700133
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ISurvivedSoFar ( member #56915) posted at 3:03 PM on Thursday, November 25th, 2021

I am so thankful for my family, truth and honesty. I'm thankful for great children. Last night my daughter came home from college and my older daughter is visiting from Seattle. Typically my younger daughter doesn't share. But without prompting she offered to share the bedroom with her older sister during their visit here.

We're progressing and I'm incredibly thankful - it's the little things too that count.

DDay Nov '16
Me: BS, a.k.a. MommaDom, Him: WS
2 DD's: one adult, one teen,1 DS: adult
Surviving means we promise ourselves we will get to the point where we can receive love and give love again.

posts: 2642   ·   registered: Jan. 15th, 2017
id 8700134
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Oldwounds ( member #54486) posted at 3:40 PM on Thursday, November 25th, 2021

We haven’t see our sons much at all since relocating to the PNW. We made a 9 hour drive to our oldest son’s house and flew our youngest son in from yet another state and got the band back together, if only for a couple days.

I’m grateful for my little family!

I’m grateful to this gathering of humans here on SI who helped me understand the trauma I went through and an important part of my recovery,

Thanks to every member here, as our collective, shared experiences helped me find my path through.

Married 34+ years, together 40+ years
Two awesome adult sons.
Dday 6/16 4-year LTA Survived
Restoration takes time.
"Circumstances don't make the man, they only reveal him to himself." ― Epictetus

posts: 4217   ·   registered: Aug. 4th, 2016   ·   location: PNW. The adventure continues.
id 8700144
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outofsorts ( member #70701) posted at 5:08 PM on Friday, November 26th, 2021

Prior to COVID, FWH and I would always have a big Thanksgiving Potluck. We had up to 30 people which is probably 2-3 times as many as our small house could comfortably fit. But it was always so much fun and a great opportunity to see friends!

Last year, we had a 1 hour zoom call with friends and FWH and I ate alone which was nice and relaxing but not the same. This year it still didn't seem like the time to have a big potluck with so instead we had four friends over for dinner. Still not the same as before, but in some ways better. We got to spend hours with some of our favorite people and everyone made so much food that I think I may have eaten more than with our 30 person potlucks! Plus the cleanup and prep was easier grin

With both COVID and infidelity I may not be exactly where I want to be yet. But things are so much better than they were. I am grateful to be headed in the right direction and optimistic for the future.

Me(BW): 40WH: 40 Married 7 years, together 20.Dday 2/22/19Reconciling

posts: 352   ·   registered: Jun. 4th, 2019
id 8700382
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