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Newest Member: Timewilltell44

Off Topic :
Lost my momma

Topic is Sleeping.
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 deena04 (original poster member #41741) posted at 2:56 AM on Saturday, April 22nd, 2023

She passed today. You are never ready. I’m in my 40’s and not ready. This sucks.

Me FBS 40s, Him XWS older than me (lovemywife4ever), D, He cheated before M, forgot to tell me. I’m free and loving life.

posts: 3316   ·   registered: Dec. 22nd, 2013   ·   location: Midwest
id 8788045
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BearlyBreathing ( member #55075) posted at 6:08 AM on Saturday, April 22nd, 2023

I am so sorry Deena. I lost my mom when I turned 40 and you’re right you’re never ready for it and no matter how old you are. It totally sucks.
Sending you the deepest condolences. Be kind to yourself and allow the grieving to happen.

Me: BS 55 (49 on d-day)Him: WH. 64. D-Day 8/15/2016 LTA. Kinda liking my new life :-)

**horrible typist, lots of edits to correct. :-/ **

posts: 5903   ·   registered: Sep. 10th, 2016   ·   location: Northern CA
id 8788061
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leafields ( Guide #63517) posted at 6:13 AM on Saturday, April 22nd, 2023

So sorry, Deena. You're never ready. It sucks.

My mom passed from pancreatic cancer about 8 years ago. I asked my uncle how he dealt with the grief of losing his mom (my grandma). He said you never get over it, you just learn to live without them.

Cherish the memories you have and hold on to the wisdom she passed to you.

BW M 34years, Dday 1: March 2018, Dday 2: August 2019, D final 2/25/21

posts: 3303   ·   registered: Apr. 21st, 2018   ·   location: Washington State
id 8788062
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Jeaniegirl ( member #6370) posted at 9:59 AM on Saturday, April 22nd, 2023

Deena, so many of us here know what you are feeling. It's a loss like no other. I lost my Mom in 2019 and she had lived with me for several years. I still miss the porch conversations I had with her. I cherish those memories. No one can replace them. My condolences.

"Because I deserve better"

posts: 3721   ·   registered: Feb. 1st, 2005
id 8788071
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MIgander ( member #71285) posted at 12:42 PM on Saturday, April 22nd, 2023

I’m sorry to hear that Deena. Losing a parent is so hard.

WW/BW Dday July 2019. BH/WH- multiple EA's. Denial ain't just a river in Egypt.

posts: 1176   ·   registered: Aug. 15th, 2019   ·   location: Michigan
id 8788073
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WhatsRight ( member #35417) posted at 4:04 PM on Saturday, April 22nd, 2023

Oh no,

I’m so very sorry.

In your 40’s is WAY to young to lose a Mama!

I was 62 when my mom died, and THAT was too young.

Your uncle is right. You never get over the loss, but at some point remembering all of the wonderful things begins to outweigh the sorrow of the loss. And you just learn to live without them.

Eight years later, I still pick up my phone every now and then to call my mom and let her know something that has happened in my day.

"Noone can make you feel inferior without your concent." Eleanor Roosevelt

I will not be vanquished. Rose Kennedy

posts: 8192   ·   registered: Apr. 23rd, 2012   ·   location: Southeast USA
id 8788083
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Superesse ( member #60731) posted at 5:03 AM on Sunday, April 23rd, 2023

((((deena)))) One of the hardest losses we ever experience, I am so sorry.

posts: 2021   ·   registered: Sep. 22nd, 2017   ·   location: Washington D C area
id 8788159
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tushnurse ( member #21101) posted at 12:38 PM on Sunday, April 23rd, 2023

((((Deena))))
May happy memories bring you peace and comfort during this time.

Me: FBSHim: FWSKids: 23 & 27 Married for 32 years now, was 16 at the time.D-Day Sept 26 2008R'd in about 2 years. Old Vet now.

posts: 20125   ·   registered: Oct. 1st, 2008   ·   location: St. Louis
id 8788179
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ibonnie ( member #62673) posted at 1:50 PM on Sunday, April 23rd, 2023

So sorry for your loss.

"I will survive, hey, hey!"

posts: 2111   ·   registered: Feb. 11th, 2018
id 8788180
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little turtle ( member #15584) posted at 2:54 PM on Sunday, April 23rd, 2023

I'm so sorry Deena. sad

Failure is success if we learn from it.

posts: 5596   ·   registered: Aug. 1st, 2007   ·   location: michigan
id 8788188
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Charity411 ( member #41033) posted at 3:58 AM on Monday, April 24th, 2023

I'm so sorry for your loss Deena. I lost my dad when I was 19. I still remember the pain vividly. You are in my prayers.

posts: 1728   ·   registered: Oct. 18th, 2013   ·   location: Illinois
id 8788240
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MalibuBayBreeze ( member #52124) posted at 4:00 AM on Monday, April 24th, 2023

I'm so sorry for your loss. My mom passed last year and I miss her terribly.

A man or woman telling the truth doesn't mind being questioned.

A liar does.

posts: 3606   ·   registered: Mar. 5th, 2016   ·   location: Somewhere in the NorthEast
id 8788241
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 deena04 (original poster member #41741) posted at 4:24 AM on Monday, April 24th, 2023

Thank you all very much. She had a long battle so she’s at peace now. I melted down more in the days leading up to her death than since. She was hurting and that was hard to watch. You are all so appreciated.

Me FBS 40s, Him XWS older than me (lovemywife4ever), D, He cheated before M, forgot to tell me. I’m free and loving life.

posts: 3316   ·   registered: Dec. 22nd, 2013   ·   location: Midwest
id 8788244
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leafields ( Guide #63517) posted at 6:16 AM on Monday, April 24th, 2023

It's still difficult, Deena. Hugs to you.

My mom passed in 2015 and I still miss her.

BW M 34years, Dday 1: March 2018, Dday 2: August 2019, D final 2/25/21

posts: 3303   ·   registered: Apr. 21st, 2018   ·   location: Washington State
id 8788251
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SadieMae ( member #42986) posted at 1:36 PM on Monday, April 24th, 2023

I am so sorry. Losing my mom was so hard. I'd still give anything for a hug from my mom. Cherish your memories and hold her in your heart.

Me: BW D-day 3/9/2014
TT until 6/2016
TT again Fall 2020
Yay! A new D-Day on 11/8/2023 WTAF

posts: 1369   ·   registered: Apr. 3rd, 2014   ·   location: Sweet Tea in the Shade
id 8788279
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BraveSirRobin ( member #69242) posted at 5:17 PM on Monday, April 24th, 2023

I'm so sorry, Deena.

WW/BW

posts: 3625   ·   registered: Dec. 27th, 2018
id 8788312
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sisoon ( Moderator #31240) posted at 6:37 PM on Monday, April 24th, 2023

I'm so sorry for your loss.

fBH (me) - on d-day: 66, Married 43, together 45, same sex ap
DDay - 12/22/2010
Recover'd and R'ed
You don't have to like your boundaries. You just have to set and enforce them.

posts: 29790   ·   registered: Feb. 18th, 2011   ·   location: Illinois
id 8788334
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wildbananas ( member #10552) posted at 8:52 PM on Monday, April 24th, 2023

It is hard... hugs to you and yours.

Travel light, live light, spread the light, be the light. ~ Yogi Bhajan

posts: 16592   ·   registered: May. 1st, 2006   ·   location: Somewhere
id 8788364
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Tallgirl ( member #64088) posted at 3:08 AM on Tuesday, April 25th, 2023

It does suck. I am sorry

To be redefined

posts: 2205   ·   registered: Jun. 11th, 2018
id 8788430
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josiep ( member #58593) posted at 10:55 PM on Tuesday, April 25th, 2023

I am so sorry. Sorry for what she went through and sorry for the loss and heartache you're feeling. It's just such an awful feeling and will affect you for quite awhile. Be gentle with yourself because your heart will hurt for a long time. Life can be so cruel because the price for loving someone so purely makes it so hard to lose them.

Hugs to you and your family.

BW, was 67; now 73; M 45 yrs., T 49 yrs.
DDay#1, 1982; DDay#2, May, 2017. D July, 2017

posts: 3232   ·   registered: May. 5th, 2017
id 8788534
Topic is Sleeping.
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