Newest Member: Floralfog


Me FBS 40s, Him XWS older than me (lovemywife4ever), D, He cheated before M, forgot to tell me. I’m free and loving life.

Neighbor advice

I have neighbors that are married. She seems nice and she leaves for work really early like 2 or 3 AM. She has mentioned this many times. A few times I have been up for whatever reason to go to the bathroom or could not sleep and saw her pull out of the driveway. About 20 minutes later, I would see a different vehicle with a different woman pull in and she would enter the house. Do I tell the wife and how so if I do? I know I would have wanted to know and we have all been in the situation. I need input and advice. No, I am not a weirdo watching them, but my big picture window faces their house and the lights of the vehicle or what have you draw my attention. I don’t know how often it happens but I have caught it at least three times in the last month.

22 comments posted: Tuesday, January 24th, 2023

9 years

It dawned on me that nine years ago this afternoon, I found out my world was not as it seemed. It was D-day and I was a mess. I had thought something was off, which led me to dig deep and discover it all. It was all on a gut feeling. Anyhow, for years that day was awful for me. Now, today, it is a day. I am proud of myself for picking myself up and moving forward. I am proud of myself for creating a better me. I am proud I walked away from a selfish person that could not be what I deserved. I truly think that is why it is now just a day. That is all.

11 comments posted: Thursday, December 1st, 2022

Autoimmune and freaky symptoms

I’ve had bloodwork show something is up. This has been for the last few years. Unfortunately, my doctor said until I was more symptomatic, it was hard to nail it down. I’ve been really thinking Rheumatoid arthritis but I am all over the place. Every joint my body aches at different times. The last few days, all of my joints hurt but I am also muscle achy and tingly in my arms and legs. I’ve had Chiro a long time, massage twice a mouth, laser therapy on my hip recently and eat clean. My doctor sent me to the rheumatologist and the rheumatologist seems to brush me off as we’ll know more when we know more. I’m sad, done, and just need advice. Has anyone got any clue what all of this means (why my symptoms are what they are) and how to get the medical peeps to listen or look into it more? Frankly, I’m pissed.

16 comments posted: Sunday, October 30th, 2022


We should have a recipe exchange group. Or is there one and I am just unaware of it?

16 comments posted: Tuesday, October 11th, 2022


The ex was finally diagnosed as bipolar. I already knew that based on his rage moments. It doesn’t change anything. I’ve long since moved on with life in a peaceful way. It’s just interesting it took this long to actually diagnose. He also wants no treatment. Shocking, nope, not at all. I feel sorry for who he wants to be as he chooses to remain in that rage cycle. Life can be good when you move on and live life. I’m glad I escaped him.

2 comments posted: Monday, September 26th, 2022

Bursitis in the hip

Seriously I’m falling apart. I have some autoimmune illness that has crept up in the last few years and we think it could probably be rheumatoid arthritis. My joints hurt. Right now, it is hip bursitis. I cannot get comfortable. I sleep with my legs spread way out, sorry about the mental image. I babystep up steps and it hurts. What can help? I stretch. I soak. I don’t know.

12 comments posted: Tuesday, September 20th, 2022

The ex shows me why he is an ex

He stopped to see the kids. He decided to scream about computers and his the power needs cut if they use one and they need to learn to do more work and a bunch of other useless crap. I limit screen time and they do chores. Mind you, I am the one that gets screamed at randomly. I walked away and closed the door. He’s freaking crazy. He needs meds for when he goes off. I would think his health issues he had would have calmed him down but yet he still runs his mouth. I do not like him.

6 comments posted: Tuesday, August 16th, 2022

Self employment

I have contracted with my position for quite a few years. I have an opportunity to start my own full time business. I have weighed everything out: good, bad, and ugly. I was specifically asked to do this by other colleagues as a need exists. My field tends to see people branch out on their own frequently and successfully. I’ve had a side business for a long time. It does great. I’ll keep that, too. Guys, I am scared shitless but I feel like I am supposed to do this. Would you do it? How do I get the nerves to go away? I am set up fairly well to be able to afford several months until I’m actually making some money. Not to mention I could always go back to contracting with what I do now worst case. Is it crazy? When do you just do it? Like I said, I have the side business but I have always had the security of my main job.

5 comments posted: Sunday, June 26th, 2022

Kid friendly recipes

I have one giving me a run for my money. He’s picky. Some of it is food sensitivity related (can’t handle dairy, avocados, tomatoes, melons, potatoes, kiwi, chestnuts, papaya, bananas, apples, and celery). He breaks out and gets ill on those. That still leaves many other food options, but I’m trying to figure out some different recipes that would maybe be fun and kid friendly yet do not involve these products. I feel like I make the same things over and over and over. I don’t know if this is the right place for that but does anybody have any good ones they want to share?

7 comments posted: Thursday, May 12th, 2022

Super Bowl Halftime

All right folks, I was a 90’s teen and then young adult. I knew these artists. I just sang, danced, and thoroughly humiliated my children. I may need ice and Advil now.

3 comments posted: Sunday, February 13th, 2022

Medical people-help with neck

So I turned the other day and my neck started throbbing on the right side. Backstory, I have goofy joints and discs and have struggled with some degeneration the last few years since around turning 40. Anyhow, it felt like the muscle (trapezoid) was in a continuous spasm and finally I went to the ER yesterday after about a day and a half of it. I just couldn’t take it anymore. The spasm was still there, but I was getting weaker feeling along that spot in my neck, cheek, and around that area. It was almost like it was half numb. Anyhow, a CT scan later seems normal, and they think it was incidental. Does it sound like a pinched nerve? Herniated disc? I still do not have the feeling back in those spots, it still hurts to the point of tears, and I’m going to follow up with my general practitioner for an MRI. Any thoughts or ideas? It sucks and it hurts. He prescribed me an anti-inflammatory in the time being. A hot shower helps as does pressure on it.

9 comments posted: Monday, January 3rd, 2022

So after a few years…

Guy is moving in with us. We live close and have essentially been sharing homes for quite some time. I had wanted to take it super slow and have done so. I also still don’t want to get married. I don’t think that part will change. That part is broken. He’s still patient about that and does not pressure me. I’m excited and scared to death. Is that even normal? I second guess everything now after the crap I went through. I am ready for living together, he’s a good man. It’s right and relaxing. I am just unsure if I know what I’m doing in life.

8 comments posted: Sunday, November 28th, 2021


I turned 45 this year and immediately got the letter about colon cancer screening. I am opting to do the Cologuard as we have no family history of colon cancer and my doctor said it’s a good starting point for me for now. Has anybody had any experience with this or suggestions… Good or bad? I just want to do the right thing. I don’t want to miss something so does this do a fairly good job?

9 comments posted: Thursday, November 4th, 2021


I know it has been discussed here before about strange occurrences, but who has outright seen a ghost? I am watching a show and scaring the you know what out of myself. Guy friend said ask who has seen one? So here I am.

I am fairly certain I saw one as a teenager. I have tried to make myself believe that I was just tired, definitely was not dreaming because I had not been asleep yet, and I can still describe it to this day. Blonde, man in a tuxedo, dark holes for eyes, upstairs at my parent’s old farmhouse. I was 15 or so. My older siblings all said they felt eerie up there. I was the youngest and really the only one that was probably ever consistently alone up there because they were all older and gone.

12 comments posted: Friday, July 30th, 2021

I am now "that person"

The person who goes so slow in her relationship that I get questioned by friends "what's wrong with him, he seems perfect"....yeah, he pretty much is a gem, but I don't want to rush or even speedwalk. I'm still with the same gentleman that is friends with my brother that I've known since I was old enough to ride a bicycle. He's still calm, wonderful, leaves his phone not locked and randomly wherever it drops, his computer is open, and he's great with my kids. Ex is still ex

Is something wrong with me that I don't feel the need to move forward quicker than we are moving? Guy says my pace is fine, he gets it. No pressure, just us being us. We are together basically every night. He keeps his place, but I think only his adult child has slept there since.....I don't know when. He said he will sell when I say I am keeping him. Until that day, we chug along. Why am I terrified to actually take a bigger leap?

[This message edited by deena04 at 6:23 PM, February 3rd (Wednesday)]

18 comments posted: Wednesday, February 3rd, 2021

The love question

So I am still seeing the wonderful guy that I have been with for well over a year now. Due to the experiences I had with the ex, I’m taking things slowly. We live close, but not in the same house. We spend a great deal of time together and get along great with each other and the kids. He really is a calm, wonderful gem. How do I know if I’m going too slow? He says he loves me and completely understands what I have been through as he went through the same thing with his ex several years earlier. However, I still have earth shattering fears of what if this...what if that...! Like I said, I am going slow and really paying attention to what I see and hear, which all line up wonderfully. Is it that I just might not be that person to ever go further again? Is it OK to go a lot slower and be cynical? I do not want to ruin a good thing down the road if he gets tired of waiting, but he insists that he is OK and he thinks that we are doing well. I do, too. I just don’t want to blow it. I feel so much better and at ease with him. I’m just nervous about my own ability to pick one.

11 comments posted: Sunday, April 12th, 2020

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