Newest Member: Notarunnerup

josiep

BW, 70 YO; M 45 yrs., T 49 yrs. DDay#1, 1982; DDay#2, May, 2017. Divorced.

Draggo website

I've been using a website called Draggo to store all my favorite places. I love it because I can put them in categories and they're laid out very easy to see and find (I do genealogy so I love having so many categories).

It's been down for 3 days and I'm about to panic because I NEED my favorite places.

Has anyone heard anything about them? I'm so hoping it's just a software failure and they'll get it back up but I'm beginning to lose hope.

0 comment posted: Sunday, June 13th, 2021

Cell phone towers and garage doors

I hang out a lot with a young woman who lives nearby. She has a son, age 6, who I'm sort of a surrogate grandmother to.

Sonny is a bit different. No emotional maturity. Very naive about the world and doesn't quite understand that other people are people just like him. But he's super smart. Too smart.

The kid is smitten with garage doors. He videos mine going up and down every time he comes here. He wants to stand on my ladder (with me holding him steady) so he can watch the mechanism. He plays make believe garage door opening all the time. Stands at one end of my living room and slowly walks forward, bending his arms just like the garage door bends as it moves. He even makes the right noise.

Driving with him is insufferable because we have to look at every cell phone tower and discuss what kind it is. And if there are lights blinking, why? Then when he gets home, he pulls Google Earth up on his Ipad and shows us on the map where we saw each tower. Every broom, mop, rake and vacuum in my house is strategically placed against something so it stands upright making my first floor a cell tower heaven.

So, would it be possible to get really lucky and find someone among my 70,000+ friends here who would have any idea where I might be able to find a model of a cell phone tower or a garage door opener? These aren't exactly the type of things the toy companies make and his mother and I can't figure out how to make our own. She did buy him a picture of the Eiffel Tower to hang in his room but that's as clever as we've managed to get.

And, there is one more thing he's fascinated by: car washes. There are a couple of juvenile toy ones on the market but he's not fooled by them. He used to wrap himself in my drapes and spin around, pretending to be the spinning brushes. Another friend made a box with toilet brushes that you can spin and he can run his cars through it but of course, he's beyond that stage now and wants to really see one and how it's put together and how it works. His Mom created a car wash costume for him for Halloween by attaching strips of fabrice all over a pair of pj's so he could spin and look like a car wash. Anyway, a model of a car wash would also be a great find.

8 comments posted: Saturday, March 20th, 2021

Anyone get an Ikea kitchen?

I'm not quite sure what to do about the kitchen in my new house. I haven't sold my current home yet so my hew home is sitting vacant at the moment and if ever there was the perfect opportunity to revamp the kitchen, this is it.

I just love the European/IKEA kitchens. I like their cabinets and countertops and backsplashes, etc.

But I'm wondering about the quality and how it holds up. Have any of you put in an IKEA kitchen and if so, what do you think of it? And do you have any tips?

6 comments posted: Saturday, January 30th, 2021

I'm moving

I've been trying to write this post for weeks now but I can't seem to figure out how to say it. I think I've figured out why I'm struggling - it's because I'm very ambivalent about it all and not sure I'm doing the right thing. One minute I'm happy about it and the next minute I'm sad.

Anyway, my DD and her family are moving back to their old neighborhood here in FL. She and SIL will both work from home permanently with their jobs so they're packing in the ice and snow and heading back down here. They've got it all figured out and and part of their plan is for me to move near them. Which is a good idea actually. So I bought a one story house in their same neighborhood, about 3/4 mile away from their new house.

I'll write more later but at least I got that part out there.

The house I bought is nice enough but it's not what I wanted. It also needs a lot of elbow grease and updates. A widow bought it new and lived in it for 16 yrs. until she died so it's in good condition but she never did one thing to it so it needs painting, etc.

I'm struggling to get my current home listed with real estate. I just keep finding any excuse to not do the cleaning or the decluttering.

I can't afford to own 2 houses for very long so I need to work through this.

I'm either in the throes of depression still or I'm lazy or my sleep disorders (narcolepsy/hypersomnia and sleep apnea) are in high gear.

On a happier note, I got the first dose of the Covid vaccine this week so that's a positive toward being able to travel again.

I wish I had some friends to talk to and to help me sort all this out. I hate the Rat Bastard for isolating me from my former friends because I haven't managed to "un-isolate" and it's just not my normal self to not be surrounded by legions of adoring friends. :)

Anyway, anyone wanna come to FLA and help me clear out one house and fill up another? Free room and board - work until Noon and then beach, etc. the rest of the day....................

[This message edited by josiep at 10:01 AM, January 16th (Saturday)]

6 comments posted: Saturday, January 16th, 2021

2 books I want to read

A friend posted an interesting comment on Facebook today and it led me to finding this book that I'm interested in reading. Has anyone read it and if so, what's your opinion?

One, None and a Hundred Thousand Paperback – May 15, 2017

by Luigi Pirandello (Author), Samuel Putnam (Translator)

And after I put that book in my cart on Amazon, an ad popped up for this book which also sounds very intriguing and I'd love feedback on it as well.

Diary of an Oxygen Thief (The Oxygen Thief Diaries)

By Anonymous

The description reads "Hurt people hurt people.

Say there was a novel in which Holden Caulfield was an alcoholic and Lolita was a photographer’s assistant and, somehow, they met in Bright Lights, Big City. He’s blinded by love. She by ambition. Diary of an Oxygen Thief is an honest, hilarious, and heartrending novel, but above all, a very realistic account of what we do to each other and what we allow to have done to us."

And that blew my socks off because that's exactly what happened to me and my XWH. And when I wasn't able to be blinded by that love anymore, he began to sink and then he met his old girlfriend who provided that for him and so off he went. I get it now.

0 comment posted: Wednesday, November 21st, 2018

Short story on Amazon

I just finished reading "Evidence of the Affair" by Taylor Jenkins Reid on my Kindle. I think it's part of the owner's library or maybe free on Prime, I can't recall.

Anyway, the story is very easy reading and sort of grabs the reader emotionally and although it ends in a way I didn't see coming, it was good in the sense that it stirred up some stuff in my head and now I can sort it out and maybe put it to rest instead to continuing to stuff it all.

6 comments posted: Tuesday, November 6th, 2018

When alcoholism is involved

There are many, many great books about alcoholism and it's partner, co-alcoholism, which has morphed into the term codependency.

Understanding the alcoholic can go a long way toward healing. In some cases, having the addict complete a treatment program and get sober can help the couple achieve R.

So I encourage any of the good folks here at S.I. who are married to someone who drinks, who used to be married to someone who drinks or who had a parent or grandparent who drank, to read the following:

Marriage On The Rocks: Learning to Live with Yourself and an Alcoholic by Janet Woititz

I read it in 1983. I remember it as clearly as if it was yesterday. We had just moved to a little tiny town and I didn't know anyone. An old friend had called me because my life and my marriage were a mess and during the course of the conversation said that XWH was an alcoholic. I was aghast. Horrified. No, no way. Not him. He was never drunk. He didn't drink everyday. Every concept in my head of what an alcoholic says and does just wasn't him. But her husband had been my X's mentor, his boss, and they'd drank a lot together. Her husband had gone into treatment and was very involved in AA and she had started living the Al Anon program.

So after we talked, I sent the kids over to the neighbor's house and I went to the library. I looked in the card catalog (remember, it was 1983) and they had one book under the category alcoholism. So I took it home and sat down in my chair to read it. It was a Saturday afternoon, cold but sunny and crisp. There were so many things I needed to do, still hadn't even finished unpacking all the moving boxes. But by golly, I was going to set my friend straight and I was going to prove to her that she was wrong, that she was just caught up in what she and her family were going through and was projecting onto me. You know, sort of like one person goes gluten free and suddenly everyone they meet should do the same. And I was going to use a book to counteract her. So I sat in that chair and after the first chapter, began to bawl like a baby. That book saved my sanity and might have saved my life. I know it saved my family. And even though we ended up like we did, we had another 30 good years before we failed.

I won't say anything more but if there has ever been any drinking by people in your life, I encourage you to read this book. It changed my life and I can't recommend it enough. And in hindsight, I think if I'd kept the concept of this book and what I learned in AlAnon closer to my heart, my marriage wouldn't have ended like it did 34 years later.

Janet Woititz has written several books and they're all excellent.

1 comment posted: Monday, June 11th, 2018

A fun read

Skinny Dip by Carl Hiasian (spelled wrong but you can google it) is a hysterical easy to read laugh out loud book about a woman getting revenge on her husband.

I don't want to say anymore than that but it's really, really good.

I love all his books but Skinny Dip is the one the good people of S.I. would all enjoy. Well, most of you anyway. :)

1 comment posted: Friday, May 18th, 2018

Help, please?

My WH is sailing off into the sunset with the love of his life and left his phone behind. He deleted a bunch of apps and I'm wondering if there's any way for me to figure out which ones he had and to re-install them?

3 comments posted: Tuesday, June 13th, 2017

Cookies on SurvivingInfidelity.com®

SurvivingInfidelity.com® uses cookies to enhance your visit to our website. This is a requirement for participants to login, post and use other features. Visitors may opt out, but the website will be less functional for you.

v.1.000.20211021 2002-2021 SurvivingInfidelity.com® All Rights Reserved. • Privacy Policy