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Dollars to donutwhores 🤣🤣🤣🤣

Dollars to donutwhores

This reminded me of my dear 89 year old mother. She always said/says dollars to donuts. Now when she says this I will always be thinking "dollar to donutwhores" and will giggle crazily. Mom will think I am crazy or that she is super funny.

I’m never gonna eat 🍩 again without thinking of Dollars to 🍩 whores 🙈

Cheers 🥂 Chaos 😂😂😂

Gmc,

That may just have to be my 12th tat 👏👏

BBE’s

My mom also is a fan of the Dollars to Donuts phrase. It is heretofore Dollars to DonutWhores and I'll LMAO every time she says it. She'll think I'm off my rocker but that's OK. She's also in her 80s.

Today is a fun day in the Land of Chaos. Took the day off work to spend with teen. We are going to breakfast first [guess what we will NOT be getting] Going back to school shopping AND cashed in some Sephora points to get us both makeovers. Yes - new make up is back to school necessity. AND...why yes. So are new awesome undies. Mom gotta get some too ya know?

Hey sister can you pm me? You pm is at its limit.

I don't have any tattoos, I've contemplated a few over the years, but my biggest fear is that I will get it done, then regret it.

XH is covered in tattoos, and he and I were supposed to get our ring fingers done after our wedding. It was the first time I felt good about it, it felt like a real solidification of our commitment... now that I know what I know, it was more like "commitment"

We never got around to it because the guy we wanted to do it has a year plus long waiting list.

In the end I'm so happy we never did it! I don't have a permanent reminder of him, thank God!

Now I'm back to thinking of something to get just for me, and can't decide on anything. Some version of fuck off is definitely in the running though!

My WH and I got honeymoon tattoos. I got mine covered up after I left with a lovely moth. I have four tattoos. Would probably have more if they weren't so expensive and I don't want to go to anyone who's cheap.

Welcome BigBlueEyes. I love my tat#3. Get asked about it often.

I say $ to 🍩 all the dam time. Now that “whore” is added- I’ll be sure to let you ladies know when I add “whore” whilst speaking to important folks who do not appreciate weird. Or BASGUs for that matter.

And Ellie-

I feel like my entire mental landscape is just a burned out post-apocalyptic wasteland. The only parts that do have colors are the burning remnants of the life I thought I had and it hurts too much to look at them too closely right now.

. Well said and me too. The PTSD is a pain, but that shame over HB (and IMO other stuff from being a BS) can be particularly hard- or it has been for me. I’m sooooo fucking pissed that I feel ashamed for loving my damn lying cheating asshat of a CH - I feel like a schizophrenic on a see saw inside a Ferris wheel carriage.

Gmc thank you. It is more helpful than I can say knowing that my cuckoos nest mind is not unique right now.

so glad I gave you guys a new saying... It just sorta feel out while I was typing. D2DW. We should add it to the abbreviation list...

ETA: Hey there BBE! TG filled me in

[This message edited by EllieKMAS at 10:27 AM, August 30th (Friday)]

aww fuck... D2DW?

I just KNOW I'm gonna be in some executive level meeting and say, "well [important client], dollars to donutwhores, I think the results will be x". I'm gonna have to prep my donutwhore face

I'm dyin laughin... I like my new saying too!!

This may or may not help those that are ashamed by HB. Which, I feel is needless, personally, as they were YOUR spouse and thats what we do. It wasn't a reward for them in anyway. It was our primal, visceral NEED.

But, after fucking our brains out on d-day and me feeling very confused like "where da hell that come from" I accepted it was what I NEEDED and he owed me...big time. Now, I didn't know if I wanted to give him a chance at reconciliation or just divorce. I was giving myself time to decide as you all know what a mess our heads are and really...clarity? WTF is clarity?

I decided I was going to use him as my "sex slave" basically. I felt he owed me so, so many orgasms. He had given them away to someone else and those were mine! He owed me those and more. So, HB/sex was all about me. BTW, FWH had no idea what was going on in my head about this. If I was going to divorce, I knew the landscape was pretty bleak for any new partner and I wasn't not going to be having orgasms with a man for a long time, if ever, again. So, I was going to get all the orgasms I could before we divorced, if that was the case.

Womenz, I literally almost killed my FWH with sex. After a few months of intense HB, by FWH had lost weight and just couldn't keep it up (ummm, yeah, he could keep it up, but he couldn't keep up with the pace) as he was having a difficult time recovering physically after a session. He looked awful. Like he was going to die. So, HB ended.

Some time later, FWH had a medical crisis. Yeah, his main artery to his heart was 95% blocked. It doesn't suddenly become 95% blocked, it takes awhile. He could have died whilst having all the HB with me. Yeah, I guess I would have felt pretty shitty killing him like that. But, I am not and will not be ashamed about having sex with my husband.

I really hope you can accept that HB was a natural, visceral, primitive, human reaction to trauma. It is nothing to be ashamed about. In fact, you should be proud that you kicked their ass in the sex department. It wasn't about them, it was about you!

D2DW

OMG. I love you Womenz!

I need that on a bumper sticker 🍩😂

This thread is great.

And, I'm dead. Can't stop laughing about this. An "anti-semanticist". If you want to laugh, read my thread in General. "I Am Not Obsessed with It, But..." Maybe it will strike you as hilarious as it did me, maybe not. I am still giggling.

I got the giggles today too thank goodness... I had to call all my creditors this morning to get auto-pays and such switched over to my account from the old joint account. Following is a paraphrased transcript of the last one I had to call today (Capital 1).

Cust Serv rep - her name is Rashawnda.

Me: (Explains what I will be able to pay today).

R: (Obv reading notes from call earlier this month with other rep) Oh ma'am, it is in your notes here that you are going through a divorce. I am so sorry - that is such a hard time to deal with.

Me: Thank you Rashawnda, I appreciate that. It is what it is, but since I am pretty sure he fucked an 18 yo, I think I am coming out the better in this situation.

R: Ohhhhh NAW Guuuurrrrl! MM-MM, MMMMMM-MMMM.

Me: (laughing) Rashawnda, can I ask you something?

R: Yes Ma'am.

Me: Are you waving your finger around?

R: You damn straight gurl I'm wavin my damn finger! That's some bull-SHIT right there. Uh-uh.

Me: (crying laughing at this point) OMG thank you! You are pretty fabulous you know that?

R: Gurl, we all fabulous! Not our fault that the mens are too dumb to see it.

I wrote a letter to Capital1 after I got off the phone and told them how fucking awesome she was I have not quit giggling about it all afternoon... It seriously turned my fucking day around. Thank you universe!

Then I went to dinner with a friend of mine - she is the friend I call when I am bitter and hostile. She was talking about some BS she was dealing with and came out with this gem, "Ok girl, you know what I'm saying? The only way my dick is the same size as his is if I fold it in half! Fuck bitches!"

I have laughed more today than I have in weeks. I needed it, BAD

ETA: I started watching Frontier on Netflix... I knew he was already, but FM Jason Momoa is a sexy bitch... I would climb him like a tree!

[This message edited by EllieKMAS at 7:23 PM, August 30th (Friday)]

This weekend’s toast is to Rashawnda! I LOVE that story. And good for you to writing to CalitalOne. They need to know what a gem they have in her.

Sister - I’m heading over to check that thread out.

In the Land of Chaos - teen and I took Sephora by storm. I used my points for each of us to get makeovers. She asked for something daring and colorful. She looked so boldly amazing that people thought she worked there. And all through the mall women were stopping her and asking about her eyes. What she used - how she did them - how long it takes. She was so excited! Then - we went to Victoria’s Secret. They had a sale. I had a gift card and coupons. You all know how this ended.

ETA - antisemanticist. And then if that didn’t have me laughing - antiSEMENantaciat has me roaring.

[This message edited by Chaos at 7:28 PM, August 30th (Friday)]

This

Gurl, we all fabulous! Not our fault that the mens are too dumb to see it.

Needs to be embroidered or needlepointed on a pillow or something.

I feel like my entire mental landscape is just a burned out post-apocalyptic wasteland. The only parts that do have colors are the burning remnants of the life I thought I had and it hurts too much to look at them too closely right now.

This one definitely hit all the feels this morning. Well said.

I’ve never heard the phrase dollars to donuts, but may start using the new version. Lol

And yes, all the toasts to Rashawnda!

[This message edited by landclark at 7:35 AM, August 31st (Saturday)]

We all love Rashawnda! It's so amazing when a stranger knows just what to say or do. The universe put that person in your life on purpose.

You all are so good at painting pictures with your words. I am not nearly that eloquent.

RE HB: I agree with SMS. It's normal and natural. I went through it before I knew what it was. It was most absolutely not a reward for my fwh. It was all about me.

I have tried every which way to post the pic I wanted to. It is not working, so I will describe it. It's a might with a picture of a unicorn in a tutu flipped her middle finger. Written on it to the tune of the song, Old McDonald, is "with a fuck, fuck here, and a fuck, fuck there, here a fuck, there a,fuck. I don't give a fuck fuck." Maybe you can search for it. It was for sale for a while.