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Newest Member: DCS72

New Beginnings :
I’m devastated

Topic is Sleeping.
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 Williesmom (original poster member #22870) posted at 1:49 AM on Monday, August 17th, 2020

When I started this journey, I wanted an incognito name, so I chose Williesmom- Willie was my dog. That was 11 years ago.

I got him shortly after my wxh’s first A, and he has kept me sane for the past 14 years.

He had been in declining health, and I was trying my best to do the right thing for him. Last Friday, I made the difficult decision to put him down.

He was my buddy and my sanity. I miss him so much, and my house is so, so quiet.

You can stuff your sorries in a sack, mister. -George Costanza
There is a special place in hell for women who don't help other women. - Madeleine Albright

posts: 9299   ·   registered: Feb. 15th, 2009   ·   location: Western PA
id 8574975
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thisissogross ( member #30294) posted at 1:53 AM on Monday, August 17th, 2020

I'm so sorry. No doubt you DID do the right thing for him. It's always so hard. He knows you love him and did your best. They know.



i edit frequently because i have to

posts: 378   ·   registered: Dec. 3rd, 2010   ·   location: southern us
id 8574977
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JanaGreen ( member #29341) posted at 2:03 AM on Monday, August 17th, 2020

I'm so so sorry for your loss 💔

posts: 9505   ·   registered: Aug. 17th, 2010   ·   location: Southeast US
id 8574981
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thatbpguy ( member #58540) posted at 2:06 AM on Monday, August 17th, 2020

Doing so is always such a hard, hard decision. I really feel for you.

ME: BH Her: WW DDay 1, R; DDay 2, R; DDay 3, I left; Divorced Remarried to a wonderful woman

"There are far, far better things ahead than any we leave behind." C.S. Lewis

As a dog returns to his vomit, so a fool repeats his folly...

posts: 4480   ·   registered: May. 2nd, 2017   ·   location: Vancouver, WA
id 8574982
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BearlyBreathing ( member #55075) posted at 3:26 AM on Monday, August 17th, 2020

It is such a hard decision but it was absolutely the right one for Willie. Please allow yourself the grief— he was family and he was symbolic and he was just a very good boy. (((Williesmom)))

Me: BS 57 (49 on d-day)Him: *who cares ;-) *. D-Day 8/15/2016 LTA. Kinda liking my new life :-)

**horrible typist, lots of edits to correct. :-/ **

posts: 6240   ·   registered: Sep. 10th, 2016   ·   location: Northern CA
id 8575001
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squid ( member #57624) posted at 4:50 AM on Monday, August 17th, 2020

Such a very difficult decision. I know it too well.

Very sorry for your loss.

BH
D-Day 2.19.17
Divorced 12.10.18

This isn’t what any of us signed up for. But it is the hand that we have been dealt. Thus, we must play it.

posts: 2597   ·   registered: Feb. 26th, 2017   ·   location: Central Florida
id 8575019
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Phoenix1 ( member #38928) posted at 5:24 AM on Monday, August 17th, 2020

I'm sorry, WM. Losing a furbaby is so hard, and having to make that call is gut wrenching. I've lost three since I've been here.

From one fur mama to another, big ((hugs)).

fBS - Me
Xhole - Multiple LTAs/2 OCs over 20+yrs
Adult Kids
Happily divorced!

You can't go back and change the beginning, but you can start where you are and change the ending. ~C.S. Lewis~

posts: 9059   ·   registered: Apr. 9th, 2013   ·   location: Land of Indifference
id 8575024
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AnnieOakley ( member #13332) posted at 5:44 AM on Monday, August 17th, 2020

I’m so sorry. I too have 3 in puppy heaven. I think of them often with fond memories, smiles, and tears. One of my besties lost her 14 yo kitty this week too. So yes, be gentle with yourself and remember that Willie knew how much you loved him. I remind myself of that often. ((Hugs))

Me= BSHim=xWH (did the work & became the man I always thought he was, but it was too late)M=23+,T=27+dday=7/06, 8/09 (pics at a work function), 11/09 VAR, 6/12 Sep'd, 10/14 Divorced."If you are going through hell, keep going."

posts: 1724   ·   registered: Jan. 18th, 2007   ·   location: Pacific Time Zone
id 8575029
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Tallgirl ( member #64088) posted at 6:19 AM on Monday, August 17th, 2020

Hugs.

Standing tall

posts: 2229   ·   registered: Jun. 11th, 2018
id 8575038
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WhoTheBleep ( member #49504) posted at 12:21 PM on Monday, August 17th, 2020

I'm so sorry, Williesmom. Losing our furbabies is so hard. I went through this most recently 2 years ago. I really wanted to take a break and have no pets for the first time in my life. (2 cats and 2 dogs in heaven, already).

6 weeks later I was at the shelter signing fresh adoption papers.

Yep. We love our pets. I'm glad he brought you love and comfort when you needed it most. You were lucky to have each other. (((Williesmom)))

I believe we have two lives: the one we learn with, and the one we live with after that. --The Natural

posts: 4524   ·   registered: Sep. 6th, 2015   ·   location: USA
id 8575089
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lieshurt ( member #14003) posted at 1:48 PM on Monday, August 17th, 2020

Oh no. I'm so sorry. (((Williesmom)))

No one changes unless they want to. Not if you beg them. Not if you shame them. Not if you use reason, emotion, or tough love. There is only one thing that makes someone change: their own realization that they need to.

posts: 22643   ·   registered: Mar. 20th, 2007   ·   location: Houston
id 8575102
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luvbug0915 ( member #22934) posted at 2:20 PM on Monday, August 17th, 2020

I'm so sorry for your loss.

I just went through the same thing with my SI namesake, my little luvbug (my nickname for her).

My heart is shattered into a million little pieces. She been gone from me a week today.

"I haven't stopped looking for the good in people. I've just accepted the fact that I'm not always going to find it."-Patti LaBelle

posts: 1240   ·   registered: Feb. 20th, 2009   ·   location: Metro Atlanta
id 8575112
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NeverTwice ( member #74421) posted at 2:28 PM on Monday, August 17th, 2020

Sending hugs and strength. I am so sorry - the loss of a beloved companion is SO hard

Will be keeping you in my thoughts. And my three doggies will be too.

Be well.

"Solid boundaries discourage trespassing." - Shirley Glass

posts: 176   ·   registered: May. 12th, 2020   ·   location: Las Tablas, Panama
id 8575120
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Catwoman ( member #1330) posted at 2:31 PM on Monday, August 17th, 2020

I had to make this difficult decision with my beloved Chesapeake in 2016 and again with a beloved Maine Coon cat just last month. It is heart wrenching. I got another Chessie--I did not get another cat, as I still have two.

Get another pet or not is an individual decision. I drove to Chicago to get another Chessie and was initially very disappointed with him. Yet, I kept him and he grew on me and within a year, I knew he was the right dog for me. He is now a close companion and a dog I couldn't imagine myself without,

You will know how your heart wants to proceed.

Cat

FBS: Married 20 years, 2 daughters 27 and 24. Divorced by the grace of GOD.
D-Days: 2/23/93; 10/11/97; 3/5/03
Ex & OW Broke up 12-10
"An erection does not count as personal growth."

posts: 33182   ·   registered: Apr. 5th, 2003   ·   location: Ohio
id 8575121
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tushnurse ( member #21101) posted at 2:44 PM on Monday, August 17th, 2020

((((WM))))

I am so sorry to hear that your namesake has passed. It is never easy losing a pet that you have bonded so closely with.

I know people say that if you are lucky in life you will get that one dog/cat that is yours, and there is a special bond like none other..... I gotta say I have been really lucky or just really love all my pets, I have had several cats in my life that were super special, starting w/ Elliot my swimming cat, and MoMo my Maine Coon mutt, and now Mowgli the jungle (feral) kitty. I too have had lots of super dogs but a couple I have had super strong bonds w/ including the first dog I my H while in college, and one I had as a kid, and now my 1 3/4 yo chocolate lab, and I gotta say our bond didn't get crazy good until work from home started. I am his person now.

That said mourn your loss, but then find a new dog to start a new journey on. After all your life now is way different than it was 11 years ago.

((((And Strength))))

Me: FBSHim: FWSKids: 23 & 27 Married for 32 years now, was 16 at the time.D-Day Sept 26 2008R'd in about 2 years. Old Vet now.

posts: 20306   ·   registered: Oct. 1st, 2008   ·   location: St. Louis
id 8575129
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GiveTimeTime ( member #45868) posted at 3:16 PM on Monday, August 17th, 2020

I went through this a few years ago. I lost BOTH of my 14-year-old dogs within a WEEK of each other. “Devastated” hardly sums up how I felt.

For me, what helped was doing some fostering. About a month after I lost them, I applied to foster dogs through a local rescue group. I didn’t have to make a commitment, but I did help some dogs along the way which also made me feel better and less lonely.

If you find at some point soon that you might be up to that, now is a really good time. With everything going on in the world, shelters and rescue groups are bursting at the seams looking for foster help. Just be careful, I fostered a little terrier at the beginning of lockdown and just fell in love with her. I am a foster fail. She now lives here and has a pink mohawk and her name is Mary.

Sending you tons of hugs.

Me: 50 Him: 59Married 14 years, together 19.D-day: 3/6/14Me; loving, devoted, faithful wifeHim: lying, cheating, wh0re fu€king john6/4/15 - Divorced. Done. I wasn't kidding, asshole.

posts: 475   ·   registered: Dec. 6th, 2014   ·   location: Las Vegas
id 8575148
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cantaccept ( member #37451) posted at 4:41 PM on Monday, August 17th, 2020

I am so very sorry. It is heartbreaking. My dog that was during that time is now 11 and having some health issues. I dread that day. He loved me so hard during that time that I swear he knew. I wish that I had words of comfort for you. (((WM)))

"I'm still standing better than I ever did. Looking like a true survivor, feeling like a little kid" Elton John
I would now like to be known as Can!

dday October 21,2012
dday December 20, 2013
wh deleted
I attempted R, he was a lie

posts: 3505   ·   registered: Nov. 11th, 2012   ·   location: Connecticut
id 8575194
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Chili ( member #35503) posted at 5:02 PM on Monday, August 17th, 2020

Oh Mom of Willie - my new beginning boy and I are sending huge hugs and strength your way today. It is so hard - I know your heart is breaking. But embrace what a wonderful life you gave him - you cared and loved him throughout your entire journey together. It's horrifyingly unfair that they leave us too soon, but I hope you'll carry that bond you shared with you always. That's something beyond special to have had right there.

2012 pretty much sucked.
Things no longer suck.
Took off flying solo with the co-pilot chili dog.
"Life teaches you how to live it if you live long enough" - Tony Bennett

posts: 2240   ·   registered: May. 2nd, 2012   ·   location: Reality
id 8575212
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little turtle ( member #15584) posted at 5:46 PM on Monday, August 17th, 2020

((((WM))))

It's never easy. You made the right choice for him.

Failure is success if we learn from it.

posts: 5635   ·   registered: Aug. 1st, 2007   ·   location: michigan
id 8575238
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imagoodwitch ( member #23375) posted at 8:54 PM on Monday, August 17th, 2020

I’m so sorry

Ordinary average everyday sane psycho super goddess

posts: 6906   ·   registered: Mar. 25th, 2009   ·   location: Munchkinland
id 8575375
Topic is Sleeping.
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