Just catching up on the thread.
Big hugs SOS. We are here for you. Stick with us.
TX my hair is falling out due to hormones. I found viviscal supplement helped a lot. Took 6 months to see results. I also found dermarolling my scalp helpful.
Talking about hating the AP....fucking piece of lying shit woman. Nah, I’m not mad at her.
I’m not excusing my douchebag but she’s a piece of work. She manipulated him as much as he did. She actively engaged him to have the A. Yeah, douchebag could be lying according to him she didn’t want to end it. He wanted to stop but she pleaded with asshole because her marriage is bad.
Well, I had a conversation with EXBF. I’m guessing I should feel blessed he’s willing to answer my questions. I need some sort of answers and it is helping me heal. BUT I think some of the shit WW say....their are broken records.
Why did he have the affair? He experienced an ease (yeah a month after DD he told me it was “depth”) that he never experienced with another woman. An ease that was missing from our relationship. WTF? Ease? Yes, ease of conversation and connection.
Of all the women he’s been with, he never had this “ease” - was wonderful for him.
Told him I experience ease with lots of people, what’s so special about that? It was different “ease”. They flowed with each other. Ease he can’t find with me. I cause trouble.
Shit me, I was pissed. Actually still pissed because OF COURSE he had ease. No responsible. Meet up away from all the stress of life. Where am I? In fucking suburbia. The ease and comfort of laundry, grocery shopping and driving to work. Oh fucking ease, isn’t he lucky.
I remember “ease” when he and I started dating.
ITS NOT FUCKING FAIR. Dumb ass and I were living a real world life. Of course it lacked ease. Fuck, maybe if he had taken me to one convention, we could experienced ease.
Holly shit ladies, talking with him makes me realize I don’t think I even like him.
God, talk about people cheating with someone with kids. Well, douchebag didn’t even think twice about POSOW’s husband or kid when it all started (I asked him). Later he was riddled with guilt knowing what he was doing, but of course that didn’t stop him.
I’m happy to report the full reality of having this shitty A out in the open has ended their bubble. The glitter is gone.
That said the glitter of our relationship is gone too.
He admits he has no clue why he ever got involved with her since it wasn’t worth the price. He’s realizing something is wrong with him.
Gotta love this, douchebag and POS decided to have sexual boundaries so me and her husband won’t be hurt. What the fuck? Told him he’s a selfish asshole. Oh aren’t I so lucky? Dickhead is protecting me (said like a Disney princess voice).
He realizes that he loves me very much and regrets all the hurt. It’s was weird because I could see the remorse, then the guilt, followed by no regrets to what has happened. I could see him moving through all the phases.
Anyhoo, told him to lick my boots and kiss my ass. I might come back.
But I’m left with this lingering feeling of who he really can be. Why would I want that?
Thanks for letting me ramble.