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Betrayed Womenz Thread - Part 4

Pages: 1 · 2 · 3 · 4 · 5 · 6 · 7 · 8 · 9 · 10 · 11

Chili posted 10/15/2020 17:54 PM

Love your kind of exercise LE. I'll play! In the middle of some new challenges (which I posted about in NB so I won't drone on about it here) - I spend every day doing what I can to find some joy and gratitude for sure.

1. That pup of mine. Literally born on 4th of July right after Dday. My freedom and new beginning dog x 2 and the best running buddy ever. Makes me laugh every single day.

2. A new decadent house project that will benefit my physical and mental health. Schedules for everything you can buy these days is horribly behind - but that just means I'll have lots of months of good anticipation.

3. My wonderful lifelong friends spread out all over the place. They are so creative and interesting and funny and true. I never know when I'm going to get a silly or kind text. Some crazy shit in the mail. Or a zoom chat where we laugh at the latest boneheaded thing we've done. I feel surrounded by them every day even though no one has really set foot in my house in months.

(P.S. Mmmmm...broccoli cheese soup. I love rocking it in the kitchen too LE, but I've been very neglectful to myself in that way lately. Perhaps it's time to get my butt back in the kitchen where it belongs).

EllieKMAS posted 10/15/2020 18:02 PM

I love rocking it in the kitchen too LE, but I've been very neglectful to myself in that way lately. Perhaps it's time to get my butt back in the kitchen where it belongs
Umm yeah Chili... Make me a sammich

You know I actually had an epiphany about this recently. I am a good cook and I enjoy cooking. But I really hadn't cooked much this last year. Been eating crap. Ordering too much takeout and fast food. I would always find some excuse to not cook. Too tired, not enough inspiration, etc.

Well I started on keto recently so that has forced me to plan more. But thinking back... When I was still married, I did all the cooking and the bulk of the grocery shopping. I'd plan dinners and come home and make them for the douche-supreme. Even if I was tired I still did that. I think I deserve just as much care shown to myself as I did for him. Kinda blew my mind how neglectful I have been being of me.

Ps... Keto is fucking amazing!!

skeetermooch posted 10/15/2020 18:54 PM

Hey all,
Great exercise!

1. I can do handstands now, after months of working on it!

2. My adorable, sweet son. He's such a great kid. He's disabled and he puts himself out there, makes friends, tries new things and is always in a good mood.

3. My fruit trees - love the magic of eating right off the tree in my own yard.

20yrsagoBS posted 10/15/2020 21:17 PM

1. I am grateful that I am a successful, employed healthcare professional who loves her work

2. I am grateful for my two amazing children

3. I am grateful for wonderful friends, a sweet little dog, and my fantastic pool

Throwaway999 posted 10/15/2020 22:34 PM

I will play along as well...

1) I am every day thankful and grateful for my 3 kids...since WH passed we have a stronger than ever bond. It gives me joy to see them make their ways out into the world..step by step.

2) My crazy fur kids...2 dogs and a very old cat. My WH hated our cat...lol. He is 19 years old and going strong. As much as I hated cleaning up doggy puke (twice) and walking the pups in the rain today...I am thankful for their company every morning and each night.

3). My IRL friends and all the most awesome group of people here at SI. This site has helped and the people here have helped me more than any therapy session. My IRL friends have also been my rocks...through first cancer and then the infidelity. We have each otherís backs.

Now...I do however wish I could say I was a good cook like you all. I can bake...cooking is definitely not my strong suit. Thank goodness my kids will eat anything.

Wishing you all peace tonight.

LadyG posted 10/15/2020 23:48 PM

I am so grateful for mindfulness.

I am grateful for my beautiful babies.

I am grateful for being me...

I may not sound positive all the time but I have been to deaths door and back and I endured and survived.

Things can only get better 🙏

LadyG posted 10/16/2020 21:13 PM

Hey Womenz,

Last night I had my 1st BAN meeting via zoom. 2 hours flew by.

It was good to sit and listen and talk to someone who understands. Thereís just the 2 of us but my BAN friend is ME 16 years ago when WH was planning to walk and leave me with 3 young children.

I hope I can be a good friend and support to someone else. Itís good to not have to focus on my own issues right now.

20yrsagoBS posted 10/16/2020 21:52 PM

LadyG,

I havenít found a local BAN group.


Iím jelly of yours

20yrsagoBS posted 10/20/2020 06:53 AM

Instead of celebrating the disaster wedding day, they hat if we changed it to


Bad Ass Bitch Day?

LadyG posted 10/20/2020 07:17 AM

Hey 20, how did that family dinner go?

I have been thinking about you but thought I would give you time to process your thoughts and feelings about the marriage date.

Our last formal family dinner was September 2017, 30 years from our marriage date. Not much of a celebration, but it was the day that I felt would be our very last. We went into IH separation in November.

I hope the food was good at least 🙏🏼

20yrsagoBS posted 10/20/2020 13:27 PM

Hi LadyG,


Family dinner was nice. Having our two kids there was wonderful. Table side guacamole and margaritas didnít hurt either


My WH flew to Colorado yesterday, for 5 weeks for work.


It triggers me, but I have decided that unless it disrupts my family or finances, I wonít allow it any head space

EllieKMAS posted 10/20/2020 13:59 PM

20yobs - I'm in CO. Want me to find your wh and kick him in the bits? Just an anonymous run-by dick-kicking?

20yrsagoBS posted 10/20/2020 19:59 PM

Ooohhh Ellie!


Donít tempt me

Evil thoughts running through my brain

Blackheart11419 posted 10/21/2020 15:25 PM

EllieKMAS

Everyone list off 3 things you are grateful for. Nothing else - no negativity in your grateful post, just THREE good/positive/happy/funny things.

1. I am grateful for being a first time mom (Due Date Dec. 18,2020)

2. I am grateful for the unconditional love that my animals show me every day no matter what mood I'm in.

3. I am grateful for the joy I have on life.

[This message edited by Blackheart11419 at 3:25 PM, October 21st (Wednesday)]

20yrsagoBS posted 10/22/2020 06:50 AM

Oooohhhh congratulations BH! A new baby! I very lucky baby who gets to have you for Mom!

BentandBroken posted 10/22/2020 08:01 AM

Hello everyone. I believe this is my first post on this thread. I appreciate the positive supports I'm seeing here and I would like to join in.

Three things I am grateful for:

1. I have my house! Closed on the refinance just yesterday. It's all mine along with a wonderful neighborhood of supportive friends.

2. I have a good career and an understanding boss. Objectively, I have everything I need and even the occasional luxury, like a pedicure, here and there.

3. I have found my inner strength and I am healing. Day by day I walk a little taller. My confidence is returning bit by bit.

Wishing comfort and peace to each and every one of you!

LemonSpearmint posted 10/22/2020 08:11 AM

Just joining this thread too 😁

Three things I'm grateful for:

1) My "I Love Me" playlist full of girl power and self confidence songs.

2) It's my last night shift for a while and tomorrow night I can finally sleep - woo!

3) Rain, finally! We even had a storm.

I hope you are all having a good day 🌞

[This message edited by LemonSpearmint at 8:13 AM, October 22nd (Thursday)]

Chili posted 10/22/2020 14:30 PM

Big welcome from all the bitc...I mean Womenz here to BentandBroken and LemonSpearmint. The Betrayed Ladies around here are strong, resilient, acronym and meme happy, funny, tough, wily and wise. The prevailing emotion is "laughter through tears."

I just popped on to try and round up more takers for the Christmas Card Exchange. It was started by the founders and is one of my favoritist parts of SI. The deadline is coming right up. If you're facing a holiday season alone or want your very own little secret side piece of joy - do consider joining in. Look in the Fun & Games forum for the thread with the FAQs.

Carry on you wonderful bitchezzzz!

20yrsagoBS posted 10/22/2020 17:05 PM

You have to sign up for the Christmas card exchange!

I have my cards all filled out already

TX1995 posted 10/22/2020 17:08 PM

Just hopping in to say hi. And look at how positive it's gotten in here!

Congrats BlackHeart! Your due date is my daughter's bday. (Though her due date was the 12th, I could not seem to get either of my kids to leave the womb, the boy was 12 days late - and I KNEW when I got pregnant with each of them so due dates were pretty exact.) I hope you are feeling well in your third trimester!

I've been doing an online betrayal trauma group and it's been really helpful. Run by two women therapists who are also betrayed wives. (One still married one divorced). There are quite a few more available with therapists allowed to cross state lines via video these days. (Some states allow, some don't.) Definitely allowed me to find a good therapist who knows their shit v someone who pretended to know and ended up screwing me up even more.

I will second Chili on the card exchange. DO IT! I LOVED opening those cards last year. I laughed, I cried, I was covered in glitter. Don't miss out!!

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