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				    				 Shehawk (original poster  member #68741)		posted at 1:49 PM on Thursday, February 11th, 2021	
			 
	Hello SI friends, 
 
 
	My attorney and I have a court hearing on less than 2 hours.  Facing more unwarranted accusations from the cheating exes (chex) vicariously through his attorney. 
 
 
	Support/words of encouragement would be appreciated. 
 
 
	I now refer to the man I pledged my heart and my life to more than three decades ago as "the opponent" aka the adversary. 
 
 
	May I never falter again should I have the advantage again. May I not forget who he is and what he is capable of.  May my heart not be my weakness again but my strength. 
 
			 			"It's a slow fade...when you give yourself away" so don't do it!		
	 	 			
				    				fareast ( Moderator #61555)		posted at 1:57 PM on Thursday, February 11th, 2021	
			 
	Shehawk: 
 
 
	Sending you strength and positive vibes for your court hearing today.  Sounds like your “opponent” is just being vindictive and grasping at straws.  He does not realize how strong you are now.  Good luck.
[This message edited by fareast at 7:57 AM, February 11th (Thursday)] 
 
			 			Never bother with things in your rearview mirror.  Your best days are on the road in front of you.		
	 	 			
				    				Lalagirl ( member #14576)		posted at 2:36 PM on Thursday, February 11th, 2021	
			 
	Sending strength, positive vibes and huge hugs. 
 
 
	You got this, Shehawk! 
 
			 			2025: Me-59 FWH-61 Married 41 years grown daughters- 41 & 37. 1 GS,11yo GD & 9yo GD (DD40); Five grands ages 15 to 8. D-day #1-1/06; D-day #2-3/07 Reconciled! Construction Complete. Astra inclinant, sed non obligant		
	 	 			
				    				 Shehawk (original poster  member #68741)		posted at 2:37 PM on Thursday, February 11th, 2021	
			 
	Thank you FarEast. 
 
 
	You and so many other people on SI are why I survived infidelity literally. 
 
			 			"It's a slow fade...when you give yourself away" so don't do it!		
	 	 			
				    				DanielJK ( member #75654)		posted at 2:51 PM on Thursday, February 11th, 2021	
			 
	Good luck. 
 
 
	Just remember you are on your way out of infidelity. 
 
 
	I'm not far behind you. 
 
 
	Better days are ahead. 
 
			 			BH 51
STBXWW 53
2 daughters, 14 and 16
Filed for divorce 12/23/2020
After a year of hell I finally moved out (5/26/2021).
Divorce still pending.		
	 	 			
				    				 Shehawk (original poster  member #68741)		posted at 2:53 PM on Thursday, February 11th, 2021	
				"It's a slow fade...when you give yourself away" so don't do it!		
	 	 			
				    				 Shehawk (original poster  member #68741)		posted at 2:58 PM on Thursday, February 11th, 2021	
				"It's a slow fade...when you give yourself away" so don't do it!		
	 	 			
				    				lieshurt ( member #14003)		posted at 3:26 PM on Thursday, February 11th, 2021	
			 
	Sending lots of positive thoughts and SI mojo your way. (((hugs))) 
 
			 			No one changes unless they want to. Not if you beg them. Not if you shame them. Not if you use reason, emotion, or tough love. There is only one thing that makes someone change: their own realization that they need to.		
	 	 			
				    				 Shehawk (original poster  member #68741)		posted at 3:42 PM on Thursday, February 11th, 2021	
			 
	
No one changes unless they want to. Not if you beg them. Not if you shame them. Not if you use reason, emotion, or tough love. There is only one thing that makes someone change: their own realization that they need to
 
 
 
	No lie lieshurt 
 
 
	Thanks!! 
 
			 			"It's a slow fade...when you give yourself away" so don't do it!		
	 	 			
				    				BearlyBreathing ( member #55075)		posted at 3:43 PM on Thursday, February 11th, 2021	
				Me: BS 57 (49 on d-day)Him: *who cares ;-) *. D-Day 8/15/2016 LTA. Kinda liking my new life :-)
**horrible typist, lots of edits to correct.  :-/ **		
	 	 			
				    				skeetermooch ( member #72169)		posted at 4:05 PM on Thursday, February 11th, 2021	
			 
	May he show his true colors in court and lose mightily. Good luck! 
 
			 			Me: BS  56 on DDay 1 - 7/2019  DIVORCED - 1/2021		
	 	 			
				    				 Shehawk (original poster  member #68741)		posted at 4:35 PM on Thursday, February 11th, 2021	
			 
	Thank you skeeter. 
 
 
	Believe it or not, he did not show for court.  Just sent his female victim advocate attorney. 
 
			 			"It's a slow fade...when you give yourself away" so don't do it!		
	 	 			
				    				josiep ( member #58593)		posted at 5:42 PM on Thursday, February 11th, 2021	
			 
	I wish I was there so we could shoot evil eye looks in his direction. Or point at him and giggle (silently, of course). 
 
 
	Hoping it's over with and that you're doing well. 
 
			 			BW, was 67; now 74; M 45 yrs., T 49 yrs.DDay#1, 1982; DDay#2, May, 2017. D July, 2017		
	 	 			
				    				 Shehawk (original poster  member #68741)		posted at 6:05 PM on Thursday, February 11th, 2021	
			 
	Thanks Josie. You made me laugh. 
 
			 			"It's a slow fade...when you give yourself away" so don't do it!		
	 	 			
				    				barcher144 ( member #54935)		posted at 7:05 PM on Thursday, February 11th, 2021	
			 
	Good luck.  Appear calm.  Be honest.  You'll do great!! 
 
			 			Me: Crap, I'm 50 years old.  D-Day: August 30, 2016.  Two years of false reconciliation.  Divorce final: Feb 1, 2021.  Re-married: December 3, 2022.		
	 	 			
				    				Shockedmom ( member #44708)		posted at 12:23 AM on Friday, February 12th, 2021	
			 
	Late to your post!  Hope it went well.  Please check in when you have a moment. 
 
			 	 			
				    				BigNoob ( member #75807)		posted at 12:33 AM on Friday, February 12th, 2021	
			 
	Send his ass to the Streets! 
 
			 	 			
				    				 Shehawk (original poster  member #68741)		posted at 5:11 AM on Friday, February 12th, 2021	
			 
	Thanks everyone! 
 
 
	It's been a rough day.  Some people use the courts to continue to be the same people they were while cheating. 
 
 
	Will write more later. 
 
			 			"It's a slow fade...when you give yourself away" so don't do it!		
	 	 			
				    				barcher144 ( member #54935)		posted at 2:52 PM on Friday, February 12th, 2021	
			 
	
It's been a rough day. Some people use the courts to continue to be the same people they were while cheating.
 
 
 
	Yep, the parable of the scorpion and the frog is one that comes to mind. 
 
 
	Take care of yourself.  This is not easy. 
 
			 			Me: Crap, I'm 50 years old.  D-Day: August 30, 2016.  Two years of false reconciliation.  Divorce final: Feb 1, 2021.  Re-married: December 3, 2022.		
	 	 			
				    				WhoTheBleep ( member #49504)		posted at 3:40 PM on Friday, February 12th, 2021	
			 
	Late to this thread as well. I'll be looking for your update. 
 
 
	(((Shehawk))) 
 
			 			I believe we have two lives: the one we learn with, and the one we live with after that.  --The Natural		
	 	 
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