X

Cookies on SurvivingInfidelity.com®

SurvivingInfidelity.com® uses cookies to enhance your visit to our website. This is a requirement for participants to login, post and use other features. Visitors may opt out, but the website will be less functional for you.

more information about cookies...

Return to Forum List

Return to New Beginnings

SurvivingInfidelity.com® > New Beginnings

You are not logged in. Login here or register.

Can a Man Come On Too Strong?

Pages: 1 · 2 · 3

HalfTime2017 posted 8/26/2020 16:50 PM

Not saying he's a Narc, but they tend to come across that way very early on. Promising the world and eager to move the relationship onto the next stages quickly. Keep in mind, as a man, we typically don't move on that pace into a relationship.

Cheatee posted 8/26/2020 16:52 PM

In lifeguard training, youíre taught that a drowning personís instinct is to pull you under as well.

Hawke posted 8/26/2020 17:15 PM

Wow! That would be a hard no to seeing him again. He is either mister psycho love bomber, lacking in self-esteem and thus utterly desperate or in love with being in love. Regardless, not someone I want to get into a relationship with.

devotedman posted 8/26/2020 17:27 PM

itsa(bad)dream said:

I donít really know anyone to call that may be still in touch with him or his reputation

You know his reputation. Remember the SI line, "When someone shows you who they really are, believe them!" ?

He's showing you who he is. We're all saying, "Run! Do not look back, just run!"

And you're commenting about how you don't know anybody to call to vet him. The question that cries to be answered is, "Why?"

cantaccept posted 8/26/2020 19:02 PM

Run. Now.

itsa(bad)dream posted 8/26/2020 19:32 PM

I was just being polite and answering a couple people who asked if I could get info on him. I had already decided to run and actually sent him a text a few hours ago saying I donít think weíre a good match and good luck in his search.
I just got a reply - he sends the emoji that means ďI donít get itĒ.. then adds ďso disappointed. I thought you were special and was looking forward to being with youĒ.

?? He was going to be with me??
Got my Nikes on. Running.

Thank you all for reinforcing in me that this was a weird man. I just needed to see it.

Adlham posted 8/26/2020 21:03 PM

Good for you.

On a scale of 1-10, he hits 11 on my Freak-O-Meter.

Stay safe.

twicefooled posted 8/27/2020 08:30 AM

Good job pulling the plug. He predictably turned this into a "you" problem, which should reinforce your decision to break it off. Almost like he's baiting you to answer.

Mel61 posted 8/27/2020 09:18 AM

Maybe now block his number.

Chaos posted 8/27/2020 09:21 AM

Oh geez. He sounds like a middle school kid that had someone check "no" on the note he passed in class. In fact, the middle school kid probably handled it better.

You did good and handled yourself well.

Don't engage and lose his contact. Any response is just feeding the bears.

Treat yourself to something nice for having to deal with that. Sadly, it probably works for him most of the time.

itsa(bad)dream posted 8/27/2020 09:42 AM

I won't reply at all. No need.
It's funny how much I keep learning at my age.

My daughter used to ask me why I still go on this site when it's been so many years since I was in a marriage with a serial cheater. This is why.
We can still learn from everyone's situation.

Have a great day ...

Lalagirl posted 8/27/2020 13:52 PM

Got my Nikes on. Running.

Thank God; you dodged yourself a whackadoodle there!

Onward!

Phantasmagoria posted 8/27/2020 16:01 PM

I believe most guys over pursue which is not a good way to go, as demonstrated!

People generally prefer a bit of mystery and some level of unobtainability, both of which create curiosity, and frankly a guy thatís a true catch will know his worth, and while acting confidently and politely, will also tread slowly to assess you!

You did the right thing, that guys attitude and approach is not uncommon, and therefore heís not that special!

newlife03 posted 8/27/2020 16:29 PM

I'm glad you broke free from him; he went from sweetie to honey...yuck!

Stay strong if he reaches out again; sounds like he's the type that just might...

99problems posted 8/29/2020 19:55 PM

You may have dodged a narc bullet here, congratulations.
I will never look kindly on being "love bombed" ever again, that is a major red flag and straight up scary.

Ichthus posted 8/30/2020 00:29 AM

so disappointed. I thought you were special and was looking forward to being with you


Is he trying to guilt you?? This is some subtle manipulation IMO.


I mean, you guys met once. What gave him the idea that you were special? other than that is what he wanted to think. This guy will have some lofty expectations of whoever he is with, which means he will be super pissed because no one is going to meet those expectations.

You dont know its superman until you see him use his powers right?

[This message edited by Ichthus at 12:32 AM, August 30th (Sunday)]

Tallgirl posted 8/30/2020 06:54 AM

Good job, remember you owe him nothing. I hope you only feel relief.

I donít respond when they want to meet that quickly. Ugh.

itsa(bad)dream posted 8/30/2020 09:59 AM

I do feel relief. I had a nagging feeling that first moment we met that he was too enthusiastic to meet me. It's funny but when I woke up this morning I wasn't afraid to look at my phone to find the dreaded text. Now I just hope I don't run into him anywhere... but it's been silent on his end so he got the message.

I've met men before that on the first meeting, my thoughts were "wow - he's great ", but I'd never say it out loud to them. This guy was already acting like we were an item. To be honest, I wonder if he has some kind of disorder and he needs meds to keep him calm...

Anyway - not my problem. Once again, thanks to all of you for your input. Sometimes when I talk to my friends or family about things like this - they just say - "oh, you just don't give these guys a chance". Believe me, if there's a gut feeling that something isn't right, you just have to follow it.

I dodged a bullet....

Tallgirl posted 9/11/2020 08:38 AM

Do you know the hardest thing in dating is to find your voice and make sure that youíre doing what is right for you. In fact thatís hard enough in any marriage or any relationship. But in dating itís to be able to do that. Good job again

Tallgirl posted 9/11/2020 08:38 AM

Do you know the hardest thing in dating is to find your voice and make sure that youíre doing what is right for you. In fact thatís hard enough in any marriage or any relationship. But in dating itís to be able to do that. Good job again

Pages: 1 · 2 · 3

Return to Forum List

Return to New Beginnings

© 2002-2021 SurvivingInfidelity.com ®. All Rights Reserved.     Privacy Policy