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Newest Member: recoveringTTer

Off Topic :
SI Prayers/Mojo Request...Cancer


2oldforthis ( member #19825) posted at 10:45 PM on Tuesday, December 27th, 2016

I am so sorry for your loss, our loss. You are in my thoughts and prayers. I thank you both so much for all the years you have given to this site. May god be with you at this difficult time.

He did not see what he had in me, what I saw in him I did not have!

Love kills slowly.

posts: 1791   ·   registered: Jun. 10th, 2008
id 7739657

1492 ( member #44831) posted at 11:00 PM on Tuesday, December 27th, 2016

I am so terribly terribly sorry for your loss, SI has meant the world to me and has given me strength to carry-on every day I hope that you can find that same kind of strength to carry-on, you are in my prayers.

Dday June 2012
BW age 63 on d day
WH age 64 on d day
2020 it’s been a long road

posts: 1136   ·   registered: Sep. 10th, 2014
id 7739677

Neverwudaguessed ( member #41884) posted at 11:16 PM on Tuesday, December 27th, 2016

I am so sorry for your loss. It just seems like too much tragedy for one beautiful family to have had to endure in one lifetime. I wish I had words to share that would soothe you and bring you peace.

What a legacy she has left behind. I am moved by all the love, respect and gratitude that is evident from all the posts by everyone here for her, you and all that you have both done for those of us who were searching for some kind of answers or support as we were reeling from the devastation that had found our lives. What the two of you created here for the rest of us is priceless and has kept many of us surviving and putting one foot in front of the other where, without the support of this incredible community, we may not have been able to have done.

What you both did for all those who are touched by infidelity cannot be quantified. We can never repay the two of you for giving so much of yourselves in order to help the rest of us. I wish that there was something that we could do in turn to help you through this time. We have all been benefitted so greatly by her existence and if we feel her loss so greatly, I cannot imagine her impact on you and your family. I will be sending peace, strength, love and hope your way; you deserve so much more..... ((MH))

BW: 46 Me
DDay1 9-9-13 (18th Wedding Anniversary) 6 wk EA, 1 wk PA
DDay2: 10-25-13 EA/PA with same OW 14 1/2 years ago for 2 or 3 months
OW: XGF Predator who never stopped pursuing WH
DS 15
DD 13

posts: 1813   ·   registered: Jan. 2nd, 2014   ·   location: New York
id 7739688

really trying ( member #5311) posted at 11:41 PM on Tuesday, December 27th, 2016

It's hard to put in words the feelings of having lost DS. No way, too soon, please don't be real, fuck cancer, are a few words that come to mind but those describe the situation, not what she means to me or this community. The words that come to mind about knowing what little I did about DS from the boardsand PMs are: kind, compassionate, funny, loving, silly, people do change, loves MH to the ends of the earth, selfless to name a few. ((((MH))))

[This message edited by really trying at 5:42 PM, December 27th (Tuesday)]

Me: late 40's
XH: A parasite and that might be a compliment
My S-23, Our D-15
Married 5/93 D-Day: 11/18/03
Divorced 5/19/08

The future's so bright - I got to wear shades

Plant Seeds of Kindness

posts: 10425   ·   registered: Sep. 7th, 2004   ·   location: California
id 7739712

Sal1995 ( member #39099) posted at 12:20 AM on Wednesday, December 28th, 2016

MH, I'm so sorry for your loss. She was a beautiful soul.


posts: 1995   ·   registered: Apr. 26th, 2013   ·   location: Southwest
id 7739737

mom of 2 ( member #11214) posted at 1:09 AM on Wednesday, December 28th, 2016

Dear MH, friends and family,

I am also in shock and want to offer my most sincerest condolences. I have no words but the SI community has expressed my feelings better than I ever could.

mom of 2

Me: BW
Divorced after 23 years of M thanks to XH's truth trickle.
Status: Recovering and healing. It's going to be a long hard road.

Update November 2013: It only took seven years but I finally turned a corner. :)

posts: 13400   ·   registered: Jul. 6th, 2006   ·   location: The suburbs of hell
id 7739773

bbee ( member #17840) posted at 1:30 AM on Wednesday, December 28th, 2016

Oh, MH, I am so sorry for your loss. DS was an amazing person. You both are in my heart always.

This above all: to thine ownself be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.

Hamlet, Act I, Scene 3

Love all, trust a few, do wrong to none.

All's Well That Ends Well, Act I, Scene 1

posts: 6681   ·   registered: Jan. 21st, 2008   ·   location: SE US
id 7739781

fraeuken ( member #30742) posted at 1:47 AM on Wednesday, December 28th, 2016

I am so very sorry to read this. DS was always a force to be reckoned with, always there to support. MH, my deepest condolences. It is sad yet wonderful to see all the "old" faces DS is bringing together on this thread. She was very much loved and cherished.

Temporarily independent with the whole world at my feet.

posts: 1333   ·   registered: Jan. 10th, 2011   ·   location: California
id 7739791

JustWow ( member #19636) posted at 2:04 AM on Wednesday, December 28th, 2016

I am so, so sorry for your loss. You and your family will be in my prayers, as will DS - prayers of thanksgiving for the beautiful gift to all of us that she was and will continue to be.

BW - Reconciling

edited for typos (I always have to!)

posts: 3889   ·   registered: May. 22nd, 2008   ·   location: Midwest
id 7739805

still2suspicious ( member #31722) posted at 3:55 AM on Wednesday, December 28th, 2016


Words cannot adequately convey my sorrow for your loss of your beloved DS. I am so, so sorry.

I never met her IRL but whenever she posted, her calm, sincere love always came thru.

Sending hugs to you and your family.

Fly high, DS, fly high.

Me: BS
Him: WH
Every storm runs out of rain - Gary Allen

posts: 1733   ·   registered: Apr. 1st, 2011   ·   location:
id 7739893

Emotionalhell ( member #39902) posted at 4:12 AM on Wednesday, December 28th, 2016

So sorry... my heart goes out to the family.

Me BS x2. 50Divorced WH #1Currently in limbo (with wayward #2)Dday #1 Oct. 2014Dday # 2 August 2018

posts: 1736   ·   registered: Jul. 22nd, 2013
id 7739904

rambler ( member #43747) posted at 4:25 AM on Wednesday, December 28th, 2016


i never looked at this section before. my loss.

Sorry for your loss.

DS is truely an inspiration to all. I read this thread for the first time today. What a person, what empathy.

I can tell she loved you and most certainly see why.

Again sorry for your loss and she will be truely missed. she made the world a better place.

making it through

posts: 1323   ·   registered: Jun. 17th, 2014   ·   location: Chicago
id 7739913

Tearsoflove ( member #8271) posted at 9:18 AM on Wednesday, December 28th, 2016

I am so very sorry for your loss, Mangled Heart. What you and Deeply Scared have given to the community is a legacy that will live on. She is immortal here but I am sure that is small comfort. I hope that your wonderful memories of her one day help to ease the pain you feel now. My thoughts are with you.

"Just because I don't care doesn't mean I don't understand." ~Homer Simpson

posts: 6078   ·   registered: Sep. 20th, 2005   ·   location: Southeast
id 7740018

Tawnee1969 ( member #12358) posted at 9:20 AM on Wednesday, December 28th, 2016

I am so sorry. Your contribution and loss are both immeasurable.

Is the f*cking you're getting, worth the f*cking you're getting?

posts: 722   ·   registered: Oct. 17th, 2006
id 7740019

watersofavalon ( member #37984) posted at 3:36 PM on Wednesday, December 28th, 2016

So very sorry x

Me - BW 50
H - 53
T 32 years
M 21 years

3 children from 11 to 17.

EA with coworker for 6m maybe longer. She was 25!!
Dday 26/6/2012.

Reconciling. Hard work isn't it?

I guess we are there now. Things are good, very good, but we ha

posts: 218   ·   registered: Jan. 2nd, 2013   ·   location: UK
id 7740196

dotterofTheKing ( member #45223) posted at 5:33 PM on Wednesday, December 28th, 2016

MH, I'm so very sorry about the loss of your dear DS. I'm grateful for all that you both have done for us when we were at our lowest and happened to find this wonderful and safe place. SI has been such a comfort to me and all the others. My prayers are for you at this difficult time.


I was BW (48), He was WH (47) at D-day
Together 27 years, married for 24
D-day was August 4, 2014
We have 3 beautiful children. (Two sons 19 and 20, one daughter 14.)
Affair with HS sweetheart.
Divorced January 26, 2016

posts: 603   ·   registered: Oct. 14th, 2014
id 7740307

Cally60 ( member #23437) posted at 7:10 PM on Wednesday, December 28th, 2016

MangledHeart, I can say little that hasn't already been said by earlier posters, but I, too, want to share my sadness at the news of Deeply Scared's death and to offer my condolences.

Life is often cruelly unfair. I am so very sorry that you have been separated from your true "other half" so prematurely, and so quickly, by this cruel illness. It was clear from Deeply Scared's most recent posts that you could not have done more to show your love for her, as you supported, protected and cared for her during her illness and did everything you could think of to to make her happy and comfortable. And Deeply Scared's own love for you shone through her posts. I'm glad that her wish to be with you again on her favourite holiday was granted, though I'm sure that it has made your own grief no less difficult to bear. I am sure that it was very hard for you to come here and post a message yourself, in order to share the news that all of us here had dreaded but would obviously want to know. Thank you so much for doing so - your act of kindness is greatly appreciated.

My heart goes out to you and, like everyone else on SI, I'm sure, I shall be thinking of you during the weeks and months to come and will never forget Deeply Scared, her courage during her illness and all the good that the two of you have I achieved through this site.

As for so many others, SI was instrumental in helping me through the dark days when life no longer seemed worth living and in saving my marriage. Even though my own Dday was almost eight years ago, I've stayed around herje, reading and occasionally posting, and intend to remain a paying member for as long as I can afford it. It's the only thing I can do to "give back"in some small way. It's so little, in comparison to what SI has done for me. (In my opinion, SI did a lot more for my marriage than did all those couples counseling sessions we had.) My heartfelt thanks. I am so very sorry that you and your wife have not been granted the very long joint life and happiness together that you so richly deserved and that your work will afford to so many others. Like so many other members, past and present, I shall be eternally grateful to you and to Deeply Scared. And I mourn her untimely passing.

With gratitude and in sadness,


[This message edited by Cally60 at 5:52 PM, December 28th (Wednesday)]

posts: 2478   ·   registered: Mar. 30th, 2009
id 7740385

imagoodwitch ( member #23375) posted at 7:56 PM on Wednesday, December 28th, 2016

I have tried for 2 days to come up with the words to convey my feelings, I can't find any.

MH, I'm so sorry for your loss.

DS was awesome. I always felt honored when she would answer my pm's. Even though I usually felt like I was inconveniencing her and my issue was trivial, she never made me feel that way. She always made me feel like my issue was the most important issue.

MH, let us know if you need anything, no matter how small of a need you think it is.

Ordinary average everyday sane psycho super goddess

posts: 6906   ·   registered: Mar. 25th, 2009   ·   location: Munchkinland
id 7740426

Didact ( member #42867) posted at 7:57 PM on Wednesday, December 28th, 2016

I am so sorry for your loss MH.

The work you and your wife did on this site has saved so much suffering, including mine.

No matter how painful, life either adapts or it dies.

BH (Me) 49
WW 48
Married 1985
D-Day Mar 19, 2014
1 year passionate EA/PA, ended by me on d-day.
Attempting to R

posts: 446   ·   registered: Mar. 24th, 2014   ·   location: PNW
id 7740427

intheblinkofaney ( member #45537) posted at 8:06 PM on Wednesday, December 28th, 2016

So sorry to hear

You and me, we made a vow
For better or for worse
I can't believe you let me down
But the proof is in the way it hurts
10-12-14 D-Day
3-24-15 Giving R a chance

posts: 727   ·   registered: Nov. 7th, 2014
id 7740438
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