SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

So glad that is Over. Best wishes.

Very happy for you!!!!

I’m not sure about your state, but can you ask your lawyer if your xw remarries or has someone move in,,will that stop the alimony!! In my state it does!

w00t!

I am extremely happy for you. 😁

Finally!!! Congrats!

OMG, CONGRATULATIONS!! 🙌🎉🍹

So when is the virtual par-tay?

Happy to hear you reached the end of the long saga and that you are happy with the outcome. Ultimately, that is all that really matters, as long as you are comfortable with the outcome. Good luck to you whichever path you choose!

Congratulations Barcher!

WooHOO!!! Congrats!!!!

Take a few days just to enjoy the fact that this is over, then consider what you want to do.

I am so happy that this is over for you finally. What long road. I also hope she lasso's some schmuck sooner than later to then put an end to her support altogether ASAP.

Just think about the person you were when you came here, and where you are now.

((((Barcher))))

Thank you everyone for the kind words.

It's a weird-good feeling, isn't it?

Yes, I am a little bit numb from it all.

My GF (we're back together) completely freaked out last night. The entirety of our relationship has involved this psychotically insane divorce and she had a lot of emotion about it being over. She then doubled-down in her emotion because I acted someone muted/numb/poker-faced to the news.

Also, thank you everyone for your opinions on whether I should pursue the appeal or not. I am currently very much undecided on that, so your opinions are VERY helpful. I sent my attorney an email this morning to get some issues clarified... the biggest one would be the refinancing of the marital home. That is, I could say "you refinance the house or I will appeal the judge's ruling."

I am so happy that this is over for you finally. What long road. I also hope she lasso's some schmuck sooner than later to then put an end to her support altogether ASAP.

She's a narcissist... she's been lassoing guys from before we separated. Based on phone records, she was having another affair before we even split. Also know that she was involved with three other guys (her current BF, a random dude from my kids' soccer league, and her friend's husband) from January 2019 until July 2019 (when she removed herself from my phone plan).

It's a good thing that blackmail is illegal because I sure as hell would threaten to reveal the phone records to her boyfriend if that was an option.

Just think about the person you were when you came here, and where you are now.

This is a solid point. I was a complete mess, both the usual D-day crap as well as the years of emotional abuse that I have been processing recently.

Thank you so much, Tushie. Your support (and 2x4's!) have helped as much as anything or anyone get through the past 4+ years.

CONGRATULATIONS!! I’m so relieved and happy for you!! Onwards. And champagne!!

Congratulations barcher144!

I’ve followed your story from day one and am so happy this ordeal is finished!!

Whoa!! The good news came early!!

So happy for you Barcher!

I sent my attorney an email this morning to get some issues clarified... the biggest one would be the refinancing of the marital home.

Was this not addressed in your orders? I assume she is living there. What if she decides to default on the note and your name is still on it?

I hope for your sake it was addressed in the settlement--she has much too much power over you if it is not.

You have time to consider an appeal, particularly since your attorney believes you have a very strong case.

Cat

It's a good thing that blackmail is illegal because I sure as hell would threaten to reveal the phone records to her boyfriend if that was an option.

I'ts only blackmail if you demand something in return for your silence, you could simply inform her current boyfriend, but why even bother, just move on and celebrate your new freedom.

Best. News. Ever!!!!

I am so happy for you!

Not sure what to do about the appeal.

Do what you feel is best.

Congratulations!

My lawyer told me that I could likely have taken my case to the state supreme court if we both were going to fight since we had rather unique circumstance. (No kids, I paid for his medical school and for nearly all expenses, making more than 95% of the money during our 11 year marriage, verbal agreement that once he's a doctor I no longer have to work a corporate job and about 6 months before he finishes fellowship and was about to make doctor money, he starts his affair)

But in my situation, I decided it wasn't worth it. I had just started a new job and wanted to focus my efforts on succeeding in my career and on my future, not mired in legal stuff from my past. For me, it was 100% the right decision. I can always make more money, but I can't make more time, and time stuck in the past was not going to help me.

Your circumstances may be different, but just because something seems to make sense mathematically doesn't necessarily mean it's the path you should take. Listen to your gut on this one, whatever it may tell you.

Congrats!!