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Celebrate Divorce???

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Newlifeisgreat posted 9/23/2020 07:13 AM

It has been two years since my divorce was finalized. Iím not sure if anyone other that ex and maybe kids remembers.

My life is going very well right now, and seeing someone for a relatively short period of time. Have minimal contact with ex as kids are both college age, but living at home. She is still living with her parents and really just beginning to rebuild her professional life. I donít think she ever has had even a short term relationship with another person since separation. And she has asked/begged repeatedly for another chance whenever she knows that Iím not dating anyone, which is not going to happen.

I was just wondering, does anyone do anything to celebrate/commemorate the anniversary of their divorce being finalized? If so, what?

Thanks, and have a good day.

JanaGreen posted 9/23/2020 07:36 AM

I haven't but thats a great idea.

lieshurt posted 9/23/2020 07:42 AM

My divorce was finalized a day after my birthday, so I celebrated both at the same time. My friends and I went out of town and partied all weekend. It was fabulous

barcher144 posted 9/23/2020 08:26 AM

I was just wondering, does anyone do anything to celebrate/commemorate the anniversary of their divorce being finalized? If so, what?

I plan to have one hell of a divorce party whenever my never-ending divorce is final.

My first divorce was uncontested and in a state that had a 60-day waiting period after the paperwork was filed. I asked my lawyer to file on a certain date in December and he did so. Ergo, my official divorce date was February 14, so yeah... I tend to remember and celebrate that day.

Alonelyagain posted 9/23/2020 08:31 AM

Itís coming up on two years for me, the day after Christmas! It was a long overdue Christmas present for me! Last year, I celebrated by taking my kids away skiing ⛷. I donít have them that week this year, so Iíll have to make some plans!

twicefooled posted 9/23/2020 09:02 AM

I got a tattoo! It's 5 little butterflies on my thigh, to represent the other strong women in my family that had moved on from bad marriages and thrived in life :)

J707 posted 9/23/2020 14:20 PM

My D was on official on 7-11 (free slurpee day) of last year. Guess who gets a free slurpee Everyone but mine taste just a little bit better. I got a bottle of champagne on the one year anniversary. I toasted with a buddy to my new life, drama and infidelity free. My one time a year I drink champagne and slurpees!

Newlifeisgreat posted 9/24/2020 19:15 PM

Today is the actual anniversary of it. I invited 7 friends out to dinner tonight., because 8 is the max you can have in the restaurant. We had a great time laughing over the most foolish things. I was repeatedly asked why I had invited everyone out on such short notice. I just said that we had t gotten together in such a long time. And I picked up the tab despite their objections.

I went home in a fantastic mood. That was mood was quickly destroyed after walking in the door and getting the home messages. Yep, you guessed it. The ex left a message saying
- how I probably donít realize what today was
- how she has been absolutely miserable for last last 2 1/2 years. (Itís actually 2 years, 5 months since she was served. 2 years, 6 months ago she was still screwing pos)
- now she lost everything of any value in her life and her suicide attempts
- how we were great together and can be again if I just give it a chance.
- that she will do whatever it takes, wait however long until I have gotten everything out of my system (DO YOU BELIEVE THAT?!?!?!? ) so we can get back together!


I was tempted to delete it at multiple points, but it was like driving by an accident.... I had to look. I wanted to see just how much of a train wreck it was going to be!!

Well, Iím now ticked, but have a drink in my hand and decompressing!

SallyShrink81 posted 9/24/2020 21:14 PM

I don't think I've done anything official on the exact day it was finalized but I also didn't know the exact date because after we went to court the lawyers had to fix some typos in the decree and then it was finalized on June 6, 2016.... the last digit of the day month year was 666 the irony was not lost on me. I think I'm too busy being supermom to do anything but now I want to do something special next year because it'll be 5 years I'm officially divorced. I like the idea of going out and doing something special with loved ones.

Phoenix1 posted 9/25/2020 01:33 AM

Indifference is a great place to be. I just don't care about that date. Granted, it's been almost 7 years, but even in the direct aftermath it would come and go without even realizing it. The fact that it is the day after my youngest's birthday also means I have other, more important, things to think about.

Meh, it's just another date on the calendar. My kids don't care either. 🤷‍♀️

DevastatedDee posted 9/25/2020 07:42 AM

I went home in a fantastic mood. That was mood was quickly destroyed after walking in the door and getting the home messages. Yep, you guessed it. The ex left a message saying
- how I probably donít realize what today was
- how she has been absolutely miserable for last last 2 1/2 years. (Itís actually 2 years, 5 months since she was served. 2 years, 6 months ago she was still screwing pos)
- now she lost everything of any value in her life and her suicide attempts
- how we were great together and can be again if I just give it a chance.
- that she will do whatever it takes, wait however long until I have gotten everything out of my system (DO YOU BELIEVE THAT?!?!?!? ) so we can get back together!

That is the stupid shit that just kills me. You only seem to get that sort of nonsense from people who treated you like garbage when you were together, lol. They make it sound like you had the most amazing love story and you broke their heart by walking away and they will now pine for eternity over this terrible loss that you have handed them. Can you IMAGINE cheating on someone and then playing victim like this at them for years after?? Been there on this foolishness. I'm sorry she just had to taint your celebration.

Thumos posted 9/25/2020 09:30 AM

She just confirmed for you why the celebration was in order!

She obviously hasnít changed a bit. Everything she said was a pity party and all about her. Also her need for validation externally. And finally her entitlement and low morals in saying sheíd ďletĒ you play the field (ďhey sugar, I didnít ask for your permissionĒ).

Thumos posted 9/25/2020 09:30 AM

They make it sound like you had the most amazing love story and you broke their heart by walking away and they will now pine for eternity over this terrible loss that you have handed them. Can you IMAGINE cheating on someone and then playing victim like this at them for years after??

BINGO!!

Iíve noticed that part of the sickness that *seems* more prevalent among WWís is this idea of writing the infidelity into the plot as part of the amazing love story and journey you were on. What an adventure it has been!

Yeah, no thanks.

[This message edited by Thumos at 9:32 AM, September 25th (Friday)]

DevastatedDee posted 9/25/2020 10:25 AM

That was pretty prevalent with my XWH too, lol. What a great love story it would be if I could just get over everything he did to wreck the marriage. Crack and prostitutes. Just a little bump in the road, ha ha ha.

[This message edited by DevastatedDee at 10:28 AM, September 25th (Friday)]

thebighurt posted 9/26/2020 20:40 PM

Definitely celebrate! my case, xpos walked in one day and told me that he was leaving to live with one of the women he had been sleeping with. Total blindside.

I have a friend whose very public D was on the same timeline and for the same reason. We both thought that it would be very emotional when the time came to sign the D papers, but both of them had pulled so many dirty tricks during the Ds that we were both actually happy to sign to put them behind us.

Mine was official almost the same day as a family occasion we celebrate each year. No one else knows the exact date so I can privately celebrate my occasion while we are together making merry. They haven't seemed to notice I am especially happy!

ThisIsSoLonely posted 9/28/2020 10:17 AM

I had a friend a few years ago who had a "divorce party" followed a year later by a "coming out" party (the "coming out" was a bit of a play on words as her daughter is a lesbian and they had a coming out party for her when she finally told them what they had suspected for years). The divorce party I think was more for support and was a low-key meeting at a bar/restaurant with her closer friends. The coming out party was a housewarming party celebrating her new life and her return to the dating world/the world of being single and was a raging day/well into the night party at her house she bought post-divorce, complete with a bartender, food, and music and LOTS of people were there which were not just her closest friends but more like a house party where friends and acquaintances alike were invited. She seemed relieved, still bitter and a bit nervous at the divorce party. At the coming out party she seemed happy and the cloud of divorce was behind her, and aside from the fact it was 1 year post-divorce, her ex husband and the reason behind the new house itself weren't mentioned but in passing.

As you might imagine, the coming out party was a blast. The divorce party was much needed support. Both seemed totally appropriate, and now, in hindsight, seemed like fantastic ideas.

[This message edited by ThisIsSoLonely at 10:21 AM, September 28th (Monday)]

Hedwig posted 10/3/2020 02:12 AM

I love these ideas, will definitely celebrate once my 1 year post-breakup hits.

GraceLove posted 10/7/2020 13:56 PM

I had not one, but TWO divorce parties! One was an afternoon tea kind of party with friends, and the other was going out to a funky, small, hole-in-the-wall dancing bar with my girlfriends. We danced and had a blast into the wee hours of the night. I remember it still.
I now remember the date of divorce much more, as the date of marriage sluffs off. I like keeping my divorce date in mind (going into year 2 of divorce) because it's such a celebration. Such a successful thing that happened to me. It was and is my freedom day. The day I got my second chance at life. I thank GOd every day for this thing called divorce. I'm so so very thankful that I got out. Am in a new relationship with a man who is trustworthy, hilarious, and deep. Almost 1 year in and we can talk for hours.

Newlifeisgreat posted 10/12/2020 18:17 PM

Love the responses! Glad I started this thread

Bleu posted 10/12/2020 19:43 PM

Yessssssssssss!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am hoping my celebration will be before the end of the year.

I really cannot wait. It will be low-key due to COVID but it will be!

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