HB, I agree, keeping busy is good! And you're probably right about his shortness, poor baby expects you to answer every time he calls don't you know?
This weekend I'm keeping busy too. I started out triggered as hell because of those texts from XH, almost didn't leave the house, but I'm resolved not to let this stop me!
Got to hang out with my best friend from college and his girlfriend yesterday who were throwing a party. And today I get to meet my best friend's baby!
I was supposed to meet her about a week after she was born, but I had a terrible cold and didn't want her to catch it. So today is the day!!
Coco, I LOVE your new stitch marker. I want a t-shirt that says that. And your bumper sticker idea is amazing!
Ellie, I have a shirt that says "Namastay in bed," but I think I like yours better. I have another shirt that reads "NOPE. Not Today." I used to wear it to work and then when people would come ask me stupid questions I would just point at it. Now I feel like I need to wear it every damn day. I thought I had a low tolerance for dumbasses BEFORE DDay, now it's pretty much non existent
Any of you ladies remember a while back - 90s or early 2000s maybe - when there was this whole campaign for the "right hand ring." It was supposed to be empowering to women, basically saying, hey, you don't need to wait for a man to give you a ring, you can buy one for yourself! And I believe the tagline was "Women of the world, raise your right hand."
Now I don't necessarily agree with the message of the ad - I get that they were trying to be empowering, but in my mind it pretty much just reinforced male entitlement/ownership over a women's body via marriage, because you know, she could buy herself a right hand ring, but she mustn't dare wear that same ring on her left hand!
Well, I did something to kind of go along with that, but also to throw it on it's ear. I bought myself a new ring for my LEFT hand.
I've been feeling really strange without a ring on that finger. I got so used to wearing one that it feels naked, and I found myself touching my thumb to the underside of my ring finger and rubbing it, oftentimes unconsciously. Once I would wake up to the fact that I was doing it, it would kind of send me into a spin out of sadness over everything.
Sooo, I decided to reclaim it! It sounds stupid, to reclaim your own damn finger. But I've been thinking a lot about it. That ring on my left hand was supposed to have all of this meaning. Love, commitment, fidelity, loyalty, a lifetime of working on our marriage, together. But my XH still fucked other women while I was wearing that ring that he gave me. He still betrayed me on the deepest level. He still decided that a lifetime was too hard, he would rather call it quits at a little over 2 years. So essentially, that ring meant nothing.
So now I'm giving myself a new ring. I know I'm not perfect, and I may let myself down from time to time, but I will never betray myself the way he did. This ring is a reminder of that.
I ordered it from Etsy, and it serendipitously came yesterday right before I was leaving for my friend's party. I had had a rough morning, crying on and off, and had gone back and forth with whether or not to even go. I finally resolved to go, packed up all of my things, and prepared to make the 2.5 hour drive to his house. Then I realized I had left something back in my apartment, and lo and behold, right as I turned the corner to walk up my steps, there was the mailman scanning my package!
First pic is from the listing, second pic is on my hand right after I ripped open the package yesterday!
The lighting is terrible, but the rose gold is gorgeous, and the herkimer diamond (white quartz) is so clear! And of course when I'm excited like this I just have to share it with someone, and who better than all of our womenz
So, raise your left hand, or your right hand, or both! Raise whatever, whenever, because we can do whatever we want. It's my hand, my life, I will wear this ring on whatever hand I damn well please! And now every morning when I put it on, I will remind myself that I am a badass!