Here we are 4 days past when our D should have been final, but nope, you turned in your papers at the last minute so we are delayed. For someone that really wanted the D you have done absolutely as little as possible to get it rolling (outside of the massive amounts of sex partners you have been with). You wanted the D, but I ended being that one that did the filing. At the end you had two responsibilities: Sign and File the Agreement Papers, take the court mandated class. You had 2 months to do so and you did neither.
On top of all of that, you were to set up the appointment with the SSA to change our boy's payee to me... that was our agreement. That was months ago and you still haven't set up the appointment despite me having to nag you repeatedly. But it means you don't have control of their money so you are dragging your feet. It doesn't benefit you so you don't care.
Our entire marriage has been about you. I treated you like a queen (you know, like your dating profile says you want to be treated) but you treated me like the fool (and I was). You say I was selfish and unmovable and inconsiderate of your opinion. Guess what? Its hard to empathize or be considerate of someone's opinion when they refuse to talk to you or state what their opinion is. Instead you either didn't talk at all or just agreed with me, so shame on me for thinking we were on the same page... by the way, I can't read minds. What's really funny is that your brother acts the exact same way.
I was selfish on a few things, but on many of the things you consider to be selfish was me trying to establish boundaries, not only for me but also our marriage. I used to have boundaries but you tore them down repeatedly, but I was finally starting to see that I needed them and was working on them... you hated that and your BBF agreed.
I was unmovable because I do my research into things. Prove me wrong and I will move... but then again that actually happened a lot, you just focus on the few times I was truly inconsiderate, upset, or selfish. I am human, it happens and I try to work on my faults. It doesn't matter to you, though. You can't remember a promise you made to me less than a week ago but you still resent me for something that happened 12 years ago. Figure that one out.
I was toxic for you because I was trying to grow and be true to myself which means I had my own opinions, likes, dislikes and had no problems talking about things that bothered me.
You were toxic for me because you couldn't stand that I wasn't 100% about you (I was only 98%), you hated that made mistakes, you hated that I couldn't provide you with everything your heart desires (good luck with that, by the way), you can never be happy, you are critical, you gossip, and you are an extremely negative person.
You have been through 9 guys (that I know of) in 4 months, still think you are loyal, honest and healthy. You may not be a narcissist, but you are one of the most vile, disgusting, disturbing, negative individuals I have never known. How I loved you... wait, I do know. I loved the image of you that you sold to me 16 years ago. I clung to that image and you used that love against me, saying I was smothering you and not allowing you to be the person you really are. You used me and tossed me aside, all while telling me you care, love and adore me.
You are disgusting. I am no angel nor blameless, I accept my faults and try to work on them. You embrace your faults and wear them as a badge of honor, something to be worshiped and adored for all time.
I can't wait for the D to be final.
In the words of Jayne Cobb, "I married me a powerful ugly creature."