To say that my xh affaired down was/is a nauseating understatement.
I think the only thing that tops knowing that my husband destroyed our almost 14 yrs marriage for his [then] equally married *AND* heavily pregnant (by MY husband) 9th grade dropout gf was getting to see, hold, read & get copies of several pages of court documents that spelled out in zero uncertain language that what I thought was xh & OW's shiny happy new life was, in fact, a disgusting shit show that ended *far worse* than our former marriage:
I let out an audible gasp & an expression of pure when & where I read that my husband literally abandoned me for an equally married young woman who happily stayed dating, living with *AND* non stop fucking her equally married bf through not just one or even two but three, yes, THREE separate FELONY charges of *INTENTIONAL* Child Abuse/Harm To A Child - all between October 1, 2012 & March/mid May 2013.
It was through the course of an otherwise "normal" checkup that medical staff noticed obvious signs of [physical] abuse on the 2-5 months old twins that they brought to the checkup visit.
Court documents told how whatever ex &or OW told medical personnel contradicted what they (doctors) were finding & being licensed healthcare professionals, they were mandated by law to notify law enforcement.
State child protective services staff accompanied by sheriff's deputies swiftly intervened & confiscated the twins & immediately placed them in emergency foster care.
My husband literally abandoned me for an approximately 12-15 yrs younger woman who freely & happily stayed "dating", living with & fucking her boyfriend.
I was abandoned for a young woman who had zero seeming qualms about destroying her own marriage (and likely others I still don't know about), in addition to OW selfishly, thoughtlessly, recklessly throwing an emotional hand grenade into the life & security of her then preteen child from her own marriage.
And instead of OW deciding & choosing to get off her lying ugly ass & either evicting her unemployed, shiftless abusive "soul mate" AND/OR grabbing her/their twin babies & making a rocket speed beeline for ANY number of their city's 24/7 crisis nurseries/domestic violence shelters...what, according to court documents, did OW instead freely choose to do? OW freely & happily decided & chose to stay involved with, continue living with AND fucking her [by then divorced] boyfriend though not one or even two but THREE SEPARATE medical AND criminal findings of INTENTIONAL child abuse!
I know little of the OCs beyond their names, who they were named after & that, according to these same court documents, both Xh AND ow BOTH had their parental rights suspended & ultimately TERMINATED within a matter of weeks.
I'm not entirely sure IF ow even had the opportunity or chance to fight for her/their twins.
It's my understanding that once CPS & police intervened & began investigating, legally losing her/their babies was a foregone conclusion.
I couldn't believe that OW miraculously managed to keep shared custody of her [now teen] child.
Last year, my PTSD therapist explained that OW was able to keep shared custody of her now 16/17 yr old daughter simply bc the teenager was NOT in OW's home when the abuse against her little half siblings occurred.
My therapist went on to say that, sadly, it's extremely common for a parent or parents to keep/maintain custody of a non abused child.
I will likely NEVER understand how ow very much INTENTIONALLY became pregnant by my then husband...and then turns around just a relative few short weeks later & knows or at least *suspects* that her [in the process of being divorced] boyfriend was alternately neglecting AND/OR [physically] abusing their 2-5 months old twin babies.
Apparently ow was sooo in lurve with her equally married bf & a nonstop supply of dick & likely drugs was so awesome...that OW couldn't help BUT decide & choose to stay involved, living with & fucking her [being divorced] boyfriend....through not just one or, hell, even two, but THREE separate FELONY child abuse charges.
In closing, it's worth sharing how Xh was found guilty of all 3 felony child abuse charges & ex was sentenced to 4 yrs work release.
Xh received 4 yrs WORK RELEASE - for 3 class H felony charges of INTENTIONAL Child Abuse/Harm To A Child.
What punishment did OW receive - other than losing custody of AND legal rights to the 2-5 months old twin babies that she deliberately became pregnant with - NOTHING, really.
Once Xh was in jail & was sentenced to work release, from all indications, OW jumped back up on a seemingly endless merry-go-round of new & different dicks. Job AND bed hopped. Changed locations AND career fields a couple times & settled a couple yrs ago into an area not far from where OW grew up.
Aside from the permanent legal loss of the babies that OW deliberately became pregnant with, by my then husband, OW has really hasn't suffered any real consequences.
OW's been "engaged" to yet another guy for at least a couple yrs now.
OW still shares custody with & of her now 16/17 yr old daughter.
OW even works in some behavioral health place!
OW is STILL very much on Facebook AND at least 8 different social media/pic sharing sites.
OW's social media is still very much PUBLIC - even after everything I've shared in this post!
As for Xh? Aside from a single not quite 13 minute late night phone call from xh around the time xh admitted to indeed being on work release, I haven't heard from xh since aprox May 2013.
Xh blocked me on social media around the time he literally ran away with OW & I've only seen xh once since that fateful morning he couldn't wait to run away with his equally married AND knocked up skank:
Somewhere around the middle of last September, after work, I literally had about a 2 second chance encounter with Xh in a chain supermarket's fairly large parking lot.
What struck me was how grossly overweight, sloppy & all around crummy Xh looked in those 2 or so seconds before I entered the store doors.
I couldn't believe seeing Xh much less encountering him in the parking lot of a supermarket just a few minutes drive from where I currently live.
I learned from a relative towards the end of September last yr that, unbeknownst to me, xh apparently lived in my city for a year or two, but the relative didn't elaborate & I didn't think to ask bc, by then, I stopped caring about xh a couple yrs after he abandoned our marriage & I stopped loving xh long before that chance parking lot encounter.
My xh didn't just affair down.
He happily helped destroy & rewrite 4 months shy of 14 yrs worth of good, bad & ugly relationship history.
All for an equally married 9th grade dropout scam artist druggie who now lives, from all discernible indications, a good & even charmed life. Even after everything that transpired between August 2011 & May 2013.
Xh didn't affair down.
My xh affaired somewhere under the dumpster & a sewer drain grate.
And thanks to their state's Freedom Of Information Access Act (FOIAA), I have irrefutable proof of their star crossed made for Maury shit show of a relationship & how everything ended.
Thank you to whoever got to reading this far!