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Thankful Thursday

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Want2BHappyAgain posted 10/1/2020 10:25 AM

Hi there all you SI Reconcilers !! It is a GORGEOUS day in NOLA...and I am feeling pretty good today. Especially since I saw another AWESOME post in the "Positive Reconciliation Stories" thread which is pinned at the TOP of this Forum !! THANK YOU sunwillshine!!!

Maybe we can have a breather from thoughts of infidelity for a bit and come up with some things that bring us happiness in our reconciliation . I'll start!!!

The other night I told my H that he was my whole world. He responded by saying that I was his whole universe PLUS one planet . I asked WHICH planet...thinking that he was going to say VENUS...the planet of LUUUUUVE.

His response...with that cute grin of his...URANUS !!! We had a big laugh about that...laughter truly IS the best medicine isn't it ?!

So...maybe that book is wrong...men aren't from MARS...they have a whole different mindset !!!

Anyone else have a cute...funny...thankful...HAPPY story to tell??? I am looking forward to reading all about it !!

sunwillshine posted 10/1/2020 10:46 AM

I love it! Thankful Thursday. Maybe it needs to be a recurring thread like stupid picture friday. Afterall, regardless of what stage you are in after discovery, finding anything to be grateful for always helps. If you are in a really dark place as we all have been, start with listing something for each letter of the alphabet. it really does help.

So this Thursday I am grateful for cooler weather. And. Last weekend, I was going through my closet and found my country swing dancing outfit and it fits me, again. I asked my H if we could go dancing.
Later that evening we decided to go get a bite to eat at the restaurant our daughter works. She put us at a table in front of where the band was setting up. She told us it was a country rock band and if we wanted to stay we would probably enjoy them. We we stayed, watched the sunset over the lake and when the band started up, we danced! Not a planned evening. But we throughly enjoyed ourselves.
I am grateful the opportunity was put right in front of us. 💃 🩰 🕺 💃 🩰

Chicklette posted 10/1/2020 14:33 PM

Thank you for Thankful Thursday 😊 We have been in R for 18 months and I honestly think we have a better marriage than ever before. Itís been an eventful 18 months. Obviously all the trauma has been horrible. August 2019 fWH suffered multiple pulmonary emboli and it was all scary. But heís been doing really well. Until this August when he suffered a massive bleed on the brain. The hardest thing was that he was whisked away to a hospital 30+ miles away and not allowed any visitors due to Covid restrictions. I was in pieces the whole time as the hospital refused to contact me so I never knew how he was. Anyway, youíre probably wondering what there is to be thankful for? Well, despite his terrible illness heís doing remarkably well and is almost back to his normal self. I have found that the trauma of this has knocked the A trauma to the sidelines. So I have my H back home, heís not well but is kind and loving and I feel that weíre a couple who care for each other. Much there to be thankful for.

Notthevictem posted 10/1/2020 23:56 PM

...laughter truly IS the best medicine isn't it ?!

Want2BHappyAgain posted 10/2/2020 09:37 AM

sunwillshine...I agree...there are MANY things to be thankful for every day...and it is no different when we are in R . I LOVE your weekend dancing date...thanks so much for sharing!!

As with ANY trauma...there will be times we go into dark places. I am going to have to try that alphabet gratitude exercise when I go into that dark place . Thanks for that tip!!

Chicklette...I am happy to see you like this thread!! I have heard this is so hard for people who have their loved ones in the hospital...to not be able to be with them . Thank God your H is back HOME . I am sure he will get well faster now that you are by his side!

Notthevictem...HEY YOU !!!! I started to write some kind of fart phrase in your honor when I made my original thread...but I decided not to. Some of the newer members on here probably wouldn't understand because you have been on here sparingly . You are MISSED...along with your fart jokes !!! But I do understand why you take a break every now and then...I am the same way . THANKS though for honoring me by showing up on this thread!!!

Oldwounds posted 10/3/2020 15:05 PM

No cool anecdotes to add, but I do like to see folks living well and getting in some happy moments. Way to be W2BHA!

Tanner posted 10/4/2020 15:11 PM

Today is not Thursday, but Iím just seeing this. Let me preface by saying my W has been awesome in R. Once we got out of infidelity and TT we have had the best year of our M. We are both very funny and outgoing and really are a great couple.

My only frustration is that she wonít initiate conversations about how Iím doing or how her IC is going (I ask every Friday after IC). She is open to discussion but wonít initiate.

So last (Thankful) Thursday night she comes up hugs me tight and says ďIím so sorry for what Iíve done, Iím spending the rest of my life proving to be the W you deserve. I know you are hurting and Iím 100% here for youĒ.

This was huge because for the first time I believed her. Our R took a major turn for the better last Thursday. I feel like I can let go of some of my baggage and let her in a little more.

Thanks for starting this thread I needed it.

Thissucks5678 posted 10/4/2020 18:59 PM

Today is my anniversary and we just had an amazing weekend away. It may not be Thursday anymore, but I am very thankful for the beautiful weekend we had. Thanks for posting:)

Want2BHappyAgain posted 10/5/2020 08:25 AM

Oldwounds...I LOVE seeing you back on again my friend !!!

Tanner...this is a WONDERFUL post...thanks so much for sharing ! When my H told me that he was making it his life mission to give me my "happily ever after"...I saw it in his eyes that he MEANT it...and he has done it very well . What an awesome STEP you have BOTH made on your journey together!!!

Thissucks5678...Happy late Anniversary !!! I sure do appreciate you writing about you having a beautiful weekend...no matter what day it is!!!

HigherSelfPeace posted 10/5/2020 11:41 AM

New here. I'll add to 'Thankful Thursday' with some positive encouragement from the universe... there's a little playground close to our house, we take our little kids there to play. A few weeks ago, not long after I discovered my husband's infidelity, we took the kids there to play. I was so sad. My husband said come here, he walked me over to a little brick and concrete thing that sort of looks like the base of a statue that's not there, and there to the side was a sundial and it had the inscription "Grow Old Along With Me, The Best Is Yet To Be"... just before the park we took our trash to the trash disposal station (we live way out in the country, lol) and there was a sign there we'd never noticed before, a wooden sign hanging just outside the payment window... "Let's Grow Old Together. You go first!" Even though this has been the hardest and most depressing period of my entire life there are constant glimmers of hope being provided to me, so many signs, literal and figurative. Trying to keep my heart open and keep up hope, I hope this little story helps you too.

Want2BHappyAgain posted 10/6/2020 09:49 AM

HigherSelfPeace...what a WONDERFUL story !! I truly believe in signs too...God is always pointing us to a better path...we just need to read the signs .

I was about 5 months past Dday...it was around Christmas...and I was so very sad...not knowing what to do. We were riding through town...and I saw a church sign that read, "Be still and know that I am God". So I prayed and told God I was being still...and then I asked Him to please let me know what I needed to do. Right after that prayer we came to another church. That church sign read, "Love one another" . I got MY sign...literally !!!

Triggers can be bad...but they can also be GOOD...so THANK YOU for triggering THAT memory!!

pureheartkit posted 10/6/2020 11:25 AM

Shine your light!

Ah yes, we all need to be glad we're here together and remember life should be good. I'm truly happy for everyone who passed through darkness and can smile again. Keep speaking the truth and sharing your much needed optimism.

Thankful Thursday should be a worldwide thing. I'm sure Thor was thankful for his hammer, his friends, forests and rivers... lots of things. I don't think he'd mind us using his day to reflect on what's good in this world.

Want2BHappyAgain posted 10/7/2020 09:42 AM

pureheartkit...you shine your light by posting . Every time I see your username it makes me smile!! Thank you for your sweet words...and I very much agree with you. Life is what we make it...and we should strive to make it GOOD !

I never thought about Thor before...very cool thoughts . I have often called it "Friday eve"...it sounds so much better than "Thursday" ...but maybe I need to give Thor his day back .

Want2BHappyAgain posted 10/8/2020 09:28 AM

Gooooooood Morrrrrrrning Reconcilers !!!

What a difference a week makes. Once again...my precious Louisiana is going to have ANOTHER hurricane hit us . The wonderful people in Lake Charles are still reeling from Hurricane Laura...and Hurricane Delta wants to knock them down even more. BITCH!!! But that is alright...Louisiana has been through some really rough times...and WILL come back stronger than ever...much like us BS's !!!

It is Thankful Thursday again...so today I was thinking of something that my H and I do NOW that he never wanted to do before. WE work in OUR garden together . I have always loved gardening...to a point of obsession. To ME...it is a very cathartic experience. My H would till the garden...but that was the extent of his gardening . After we started R...my H seemed to take an interest in gardening . I kind of figured he would do it for a little bit then get bored with it because he is more into seeing results quickly...and it takes time to reap what you sow. But he kept at it with me...and actually started planting some plants that HE was interested in harvesting!! We are ENJOYING the fruits of our labor for sure !! We even go out together to harvest our vegetables...and it pleasantly surprises me every day at this change in him . He nurtures these plants much like he is nurturing me now...and it makes me want to nurture him even more. Who knew that something so simple as planting a seed and watching it grow to fruition could be so profound in many other ways??!!

I am very thankful that I live in an area where I can plant almost year round...and I am even more thankful that I have a partner who loves doing this almost as much as I do !!!

So come on Reconcilers...lets keep this going ! What are YOU thankful for in your R experience??? I would LOVE to read what you have to write !!!

Tanner posted 10/8/2020 17:43 PM

Iím thankful that W has given so much to this process. We have enjoyed fitness together, small background, Aug 1, 2016, my W was depressed SAHM with special needs kids, weighing 240 lbs. She got rid of all (the good) food in the house and said Iím cleaning my diet. She lost 115 lbs in a little over 9 months. She then started studying nutrition and fitness and became a certified trainer in October 2018. Last summer she decided to prep for a bikini competition, we hired a nutrition, posing, and competition coach. She worked her ass off and competed in 3 competitions in 2019, she is a 46 year old grandmother and came in 4th out of 12 ladies in her group.

All of that to say, her passion is to help women who feel they are too far gone, too over weight to bother. Also, helping other moms with special needs kids, itís a very isolating and depressing life for these moms. I hear her on the phone crying with these ladies and passionately encouraging them. She has helped me get in great shape and in 2021 I will prep for a menís physique competition and her another bikini competition.

Iím thankful for her dedication to our R and health journey.

outofsorts posted 10/8/2020 20:37 PM

One small thing from me.... Several months after d-day our MC suggested we try to build something together. So we decided to start taking ballroom dance lessons and it is so much fun!!

We both (obviously) thought we'd like the ballroom dancing, but both ended up enjoying it more than expected. And we've just started learning Hustle dancing which is one of the main dances I've wanted to learn since we started.

So anyway, I'm thankful that we now have such a fun new hobby!

sunwillshine posted 10/8/2020 22:56 PM

yay, I'm so glad to see Thankful Thursday come back around. Last night my H stayed up late to help me look at Mars through the telescope he recently purchased for me. He is not a late night guy. I'm very grateful.

The telescope story. I had my old 8mm tapes converted to digital. We were all having so much fun watching the recordings of past Christmases. Then the trigger. It was a doosey. Years ago he gave me a telescope for Christmas. Then I remembered what happened to that telescope. Several years after getting the telescope and ours lives too busy to pull it out, he asked if we could give the telescope to the son of one of the ow. Of course, at the time, i didn't know she was an ow and he was trying to impress her so I agreed. Ugg.
Ugh.

After seeing the Christmas video, I talked with him about my trigger and told him he owed me a telescope. I did not expect him to purchase a new one immediately. Within the week, a really nice telescope was delivered to me. I love it! I not only look at the moon and planets, I love bird watching with it. We have beautiful white pelicans on the lake behind the house. I'm so grateful that my H has worked so hard to show me he loves me.
I love this thread.

sunwillshine posted 10/8/2020 23:13 PM

Also - sending love and hope to East Texas and Louisiana. 🙏 Praying Delta will weaken before making landfall.

GTeamReboot posted 10/9/2020 09:18 AM

I started to post here yesterday (Thursday) as an act of gratitude. I noticed this morning that I didn't finish the post before getting sleepy! I've had a craze week, see separate post I just made.

This week... Thursday was DDay... It was hard to be thankful on that Thursday! But I am trying to see the value of the struggle, the opportunity for us to be better. I see that potential more clearly than he does, and that's hard at times. But I was always the Pollyanna in the relationship, and he the Debbie Downer. LOL! But we will keep at it!!

Today I'm thankful for some fun family plans we have later.

[This message edited by GTeamReboot at 9:19 AM, October 9th (Friday)]

Want2BHappyAgain posted 10/9/2020 10:39 AM

Tanner...very nice post for this thread...thank you for sharing !!! That is AWESOME that your W has been able to overcome her issues and then HELP others! I could sure use someone like her with my weight loss issues...but I might pull them back to the other side...so I better not attempt it !!

I LOVE what she did for you . It is often said on here ACTIONS over WORDS...but to me...words MATTER. Her words to you...along with her action of hugging you...show her HEART .

outofsorts...how WONDERFUL to find a new hobby that is not only FUN...but good in many ways !! My H and I have two left feet...but we can sure enjoy watching others dance!!! Thanks for posting your story on here...it made me smile !!!

sunwillshine...thank YOU for encouraging me to keep this up !! There are so many things I am grateful for about our R...and I know I'm not the only one. Having a thread to put our little posts on is FUN...and hopefully it will show that R can be very POSITIVE .

Wow...that would definitely be a hard trigger to remember about the telescope . Yet you didn't let that keep you from finding a way to OWN that trigger...kudos to you! Your H should have a star named after him because he sure SHINED with that gift !

Thank you for your thoughts about Delta. We are having family come over to stay because they are more in the path than we are...although we may lose our electricity from this. Delta is starting to weaken...so the prayers are helping . Thank you for the prayers and PLEASE everyone...keep the prayers up!

GTeamReboot...you really have had a weird week!!! I hope your tests come back just fine...whichever route your doctor decides to go on (((HUGS))).

If you look on page 13 of the "Positive Reconciliation Stories" thread...you will see a post I made about my 2nd Dday antiversary. It shows how my perspective changed from it being a negative date in my mind...to a positive one . I still see that date as POSITIVE !! BTW...people call me "Pollyanna" because of my upbeat attitude...so I sure relate to what you are saying about yourself!!

ENJOY your family plans !!!

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