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Newest Member: Jesse123

Off Topic :
Funny Dad jokes

Topic is Sleeping.
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Tanner ( Guide #72235) posted at 6:34 AM on Saturday, January 7th, 2023

Tallgirl 馃ぃ馃ぃ馃ぃ

Dday Sept 7 2019 doing well in R BH M 32 years

posts: 3302   路   registered: Dec. 5th, 2019   路   location: Texas DFW
id 8772458
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 Tallgirl (original poster member #64088) posted at 3:16 AM on Monday, January 9th, 2023

I know eh, Some of them make me laugh out loud.

To be redefined

posts: 2205   路   registered: Jun. 11th, 2018
id 8772580
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leafields ( Guide #63517) posted at 3:12 PM on Wednesday, February 1st, 2023

What concert costs 45 cents?

50 Cent with Nickleback.

BW M 34years, Dday 1: March 2018, Dday 2: August 2019, D final 2/25/21

posts: 3126   路   registered: Apr. 21st, 2018   路   location: Washington State
id 8775646
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ThisIsSoLonely ( Guide #64418) posted at 5:55 PM on Wednesday, February 1st, 2023

Okay - I'm dumb. I thought this meant jokes about dads...and I was really mystified as to how any of them relate to being a dad. Duh. Carry on.

You are the only person you are guaranteed to spend the rest of your life with. Act accordingly.

Constantly editing posts: usually due to sticky keys on my laptop or additional thoughts

posts: 2260   路   registered: Jul. 11th, 2018
id 8775680
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Tanner ( Guide #72235) posted at 7:22 PM on Wednesday, February 1st, 2023

Okay - I'm dumb. I thought this meant jokes about dads...and I was really mystified as to how any of them relate to being a dad. Duh. Carry on.

No it鈥檚 just corny jokes that make teenagers say "Gawd Dad that was dumb" as they laugh.

Dday Sept 7 2019 doing well in R BH M 32 years

posts: 3302   路   registered: Dec. 5th, 2019   路   location: Texas DFW
id 8775690
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WhatsRight ( member #35417) posted at 8:41 PM on Wednesday, February 1st, 2023

At my house we called them Cub Scout jokes.

"Noone can make you feel inferior without your concent." Eleanor Roosevelt

I will not be vanquished. Rose Kennedy

posts: 8139   路   registered: Apr. 23rd, 2012   路   location: Southeast USA
id 8775708
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Tanner ( Guide #72235) posted at 4:11 PM on Thursday, February 2nd, 2023

I only know 25 letters of the alphabet, I don鈥檛 know "y"

Dday Sept 7 2019 doing well in R BH M 32 years

posts: 3302   路   registered: Dec. 5th, 2019   路   location: Texas DFW
id 8775815
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Sally24 ( new member #70794) posted at 4:39 PM on Thursday, February 2nd, 2023

What do you call a cow with no legs?


Ground beef

Never let your fear decide your fate

posts: 49   路   registered: Jun. 18th, 2019
id 8775820
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leafields ( Guide #63517) posted at 1:40 AM on Friday, February 3rd, 2023

What do you do with a dog that has no legs?

Take it for a drag.

BW M 34years, Dday 1: March 2018, Dday 2: August 2019, D final 2/25/21

posts: 3126   路   registered: Apr. 21st, 2018   路   location: Washington State
id 8775876
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Tanner ( Guide #72235) posted at 3:44 AM on Thursday, February 9th, 2023

Did you know nothing starts with N and ends with G?

[This message edited by Tanner at 10:21 AM, Thursday, February 9th]

Dday Sept 7 2019 doing well in R BH M 32 years

posts: 3302   路   registered: Dec. 5th, 2019   路   location: Texas DFW
id 8776718
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emergent8 ( Guide #58189) posted at 5:08 AM on Thursday, February 9th, 2023

My 4 year old鈥檚 favourite joke:

How do you make a tissue dance?

You put a little boogie in it!

Me: BS. Him: WS. Together 16 years.
D-Day: Feb 2017 (8 m PA with married COW).
6+ years (and two kids) into R. Happy.

posts: 1891   路   registered: Apr. 7th, 2017
id 8776725
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Tred ( member #34086) posted at 9:51 PM on Friday, February 10th, 2023

What do you call a dog with no legs?

Nothing. He aint coming.

Married: 26 years (14 @JFO)D-Day: 11/09/11"Ohhhhh...shut up Tred!" - NOT the official SI motto (DS)

posts: 5866   路   registered: Dec. 2nd, 2011
id 8777181
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EvenKeel ( member #24210) posted at 9:12 PM on Monday, February 13th, 2023

How do farmers party?

They turnip the beets.....

posts: 6860   路   registered: May. 31st, 2009   路   location: Pennsylvania
id 8777532
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Jeaniegirl ( member #6370) posted at 2:18 AM on Tuesday, February 14th, 2023

This was my Grandpa's favorite as he liked to scare my sister and me --- especially ghost stories.

"Do you KNOW if you take a fork, at midnight, to the graveyard and stick it in a grave and say .."whatcha' doing down there?" ... and they will say .."Nuthin' at all."

Took both of us a while to figure it out.

"Because I deserve better"

posts: 3667   路   registered: Feb. 1st, 2005
id 8777567
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Tanner ( Guide #72235) posted at 8:33 PM on Saturday, February 25th, 2023

I would like to share with everyone the benefits of dried grapes.

It鈥檚 about raisin awareness.

Dday Sept 7 2019 doing well in R BH M 32 years

posts: 3302   路   registered: Dec. 5th, 2019   路   location: Texas DFW
id 8779401
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WhatsRight ( member #35417) posted at 12:21 PM on Saturday, March 4th, 2023

OK, I鈥檓 an idiot. I don鈥檛 get the thing with the fork in the grave.

Someone have pity, and help me!

"Noone can make you feel inferior without your concent." Eleanor Roosevelt

I will not be vanquished. Rose Kennedy

posts: 8139   路   registered: Apr. 23rd, 2012   路   location: Southeast USA
id 8780740
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leafields ( Guide #63517) posted at 4:55 AM on Wednesday, March 15th, 2023

Why do ducks have tail feathers?

To cover their butt quacks.

BW M 34years, Dday 1: March 2018, Dday 2: August 2019, D final 2/25/21

posts: 3126   路   registered: Apr. 21st, 2018   路   location: Washington State
id 8782287
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Tanner ( Guide #72235) posted at 8:26 PM on Monday, July 3rd, 2023

I saw a T-shirt today

Dad Jokes
It's how eye roll

Dday Sept 7 2019 doing well in R BH M 32 years

posts: 3302   路   registered: Dec. 5th, 2019   路   location: Texas DFW
id 8798019
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Bulcy ( member #74034) posted at 10:31 PM on Sunday, July 9th, 2023

What do you call a magician who has lost his magic?


Ian

WH (50's)

Multiple sexual, emotional and online affairs. Financial infidelity and emotional abuse. Physical abuse and intimidation.

D-days 2003, 2017, multiple d-days and TT through 2018 to 2023. 28 years of destructive and health damaging choice

posts: 357   路   registered: Mar. 12th, 2020   路   location: UK
id 8798822
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Bulcy ( member #74034) posted at 10:35 PM on Sunday, July 9th, 2023

What do you call a magician who has lost his magic?


Ian

WH (50's)

Multiple sexual, emotional and online affairs. Financial infidelity and emotional abuse. Physical abuse and intimidation.

D-days 2003, 2017, multiple d-days and TT through 2018 to 2023. 28 years of destructive and health damaging choice

posts: 357   路   registered: Mar. 12th, 2020   路   location: UK
id 8798823
Topic is Sleeping.
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