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Off Topic :
Trying to figure this out

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 WhatsRight (original poster member #35417) posted at 8:20 AM on Friday, July 8th, 2022

Yes, I always stay when he is in the hospital. It is tiring, but when he is really sick, I love having medical professionals around…mostly. Some seem to resent my presence, but some are happy for the input /help. After asking me some questions, one of the doctors asked me if I was in the health care field.

Once today he was vomiting and started choking. Just a simple roll to be more on his side did the trick, but no one was around but me. I need to be here.

He has had nausea and vomiting all day. Brownish in color. FINALLY took it to be tested for blood. Haven’t heard back yet.

He can’t take any oral meds. FINALLY got him IV nausea meds.

He has actually been resting / sleeping for a few hours now.

Knock on wood.

"Noone can make you feel inferior without your concent." Eleanor Roosevelt

I will not be vanquished. Rose Kennedy

posts: 7542   ·   registered: Apr. 23rd, 2012   ·   location: Southeast USA
id 8743772
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little turtle ( member #15584) posted at 3:01 PM on Saturday, July 9th, 2022

Hope things are getting better for your H and the vomiting has passed.

I'm happy to see that you're going back to teaching and getting together with your girl friends. I have a monthly dinner date with some friends and monthly lunch date with other friends. It's made a world of a difference for me! grin

Please keep us posted!

Failure is success if we learn from it.

posts: 5497   ·   registered: Aug. 1st, 2007   ·   location: michigan
id 8744011
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truthsetmefree ( member #7168) posted at 6:00 PM on Saturday, July 9th, 2022

I feel for you SO much, WR. It just seems like you have challenges after challenges…and I find myself asking Life, why? And it’s an especially hard question because you seem like such a nice, giving, genuinely caring person. I think it’s that reason why so many of us feel like we want to protect you…and often try to achieve that by encouraging you to protect yourself (which can subsequently feel like lack of empathy/understanding/support). I’m never tired of you posting; I’m tired of things hurting you. You deserve some peace.

All I can figure out through these experiences is that maybe Life is teaching you how to let go. Of what, I’m not entirely sure - so I have no advice there. And how that looks in action, I don’t know either. I certainly can’t tell you in good conscious that that is what you need to do. And I can certainly see how doing that is the physical realm is conflicting.

But if it gives you any consolation, I see through your posts that you are somehow figuring this out. You are being changed by these experiences…so if this IS all somehow a Life teaching moment then I have hope that you are close to mastery and perhaps will find a higher and unshakeable peace very soon. ❤️

Hope has two beautiful daughters; their names are Anger and Courage. Anger at the way things are, and Courage to see that they do not remain as they are. ~ Augustine of Hippo

posts: 8870   ·   registered: May. 18th, 2005
id 8744034
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 WhatsRight (original poster member #35417) posted at 8:16 PM on Saturday, July 9th, 2022

Wow,truth! Thx.

From your lips to God’s ears!

Update: My H is feeling much better today.

No pain meds since yesterday.

Drinking sprite and water.

Ate breakfast and is eating lunch now.

Hospitalist said the UTI was not resistant to antibiotics. He is supposed to be on antibiotics for 2 weeks. As soon as he is cleared to go home, he can finish the antibiotics with a pill at home.

I'm secretly hoping maybe he can go home tomorrow, but need to wait to see the infectious disease doc.

Thanks for your thoughts and prayers. You can’t know how much it means to me to get to vent / share here.

No way to predict the future, but we can be thankful for today!!!

I have told him that I had been worried that this time he might not make it home, and that however he wanted to spend the rest of his life, he should get after it when we get home.

Time will tell.

"Noone can make you feel inferior without your concent." Eleanor Roosevelt

I will not be vanquished. Rose Kennedy

posts: 7542   ·   registered: Apr. 23rd, 2012   ·   location: Southeast USA
id 8744053
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The1stWife ( member #58832) posted at 10:41 PM on Saturday, July 9th, 2022

You are such a blessing. I hope your H appreciates it even if he doesn’t verbalize it.

Survived two affairs and brink of Divorce. Happily reconciled.

posts: 12308   ·   registered: May. 19th, 2017
id 8744060
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Jeaniegirl ( member #6370) posted at 4:10 AM on Sunday, July 10th, 2022

So glad to hear there is improvement! I know you will rest much better at home! He will too.

I was talking with my sister recently and she was relaying to me that I was really MEAN when I had the cancer surgery last year. She spent some nights with me in the hospital. The second night after surgery, she said they had woke me up about 3 a.m. to do whatever they have to do in the middle of the night. She said the nurse finished and asked me if there was anything else he could do for me and she said I SNAPPED at him and said ...'ten minutes of uninterrupted sleep would be nice!" That isn't like me to be snappy to health care workers. She said even the nurse laughed. I don't remember it.

I hope you both get to go home soon.

"Because I deserve better"

posts: 3236   ·   registered: Feb. 1st, 2005
id 8744077
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 WhatsRight (original poster member #35417) posted at 5:37 PM on Sunday, July 10th, 2022

That is hysterical…and so TRUE!!!

The good thing about that is that everyone seems to give you a little bit of slack when you act that way in the hospital, because… you know… the hospital.

😊😊😊

[This message edited by WhatsRight at 5:40 PM, Sunday, July 10th]

"Noone can make you feel inferior without your concent." Eleanor Roosevelt

I will not be vanquished. Rose Kennedy

posts: 7542   ·   registered: Apr. 23rd, 2012   ·   location: Southeast USA
id 8744104
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 WhatsRight (original poster member #35417) posted at 11:04 PM on Wednesday, July 13th, 2022

Sooooooo…

Back in the ER.

He woke up this morning @ 1:30am with bad belly pain. FINALLY spoke with PCP dr at around 1:00 pm.

I’ll spare you the details, but PCP dr fears either intestinal infection, or more ulcerative esophagitis. Or both. So he told us to get back to the ER.

And, that he would be praying for us. 😳

Not shocked about him being one who prays, but made me nervous that he feels such a need for it at this time.

So we are here, waiting for the ER dr to come chat with us. In triage, we learned his BP was low again…80/50. So there’s that.

I have already had conversations with my boys re their dad’s situation. They understand it is impossible to know when they will lose him, but also understand that ‘sooner than later" may be what we are facing.

Also, I don’t think I have shared that my youngest son has been indicted by a federal grand jury. So he will be serving some time for sure.

So, rather than thinking it might be better for my H to not have to fight longer, I am willing him to stay as healthy as he can so there is a chance my son could see him again.

It’s my understanding that federal prisons allow for in person visits. If he could just be able to visit with his dad in person. 🙏🙏🙏

My PTSD is kicking in a bit. 🥲

[This message edited by WhatsRight at 11:12 PM, Wednesday, July 13th]

"Noone can make you feel inferior without your concent." Eleanor Roosevelt

I will not be vanquished. Rose Kennedy

posts: 7542   ·   registered: Apr. 23rd, 2012   ·   location: Southeast USA
id 8744579
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MIgander ( member #71285) posted at 11:59 PM on Wednesday, July 13th, 2022

Ok if I pray for you??

WW/BW Dday July 2019. BH/WH- multiple EA's. Back at it again- bantering w the younger woman. Lied about blocking phone calls and deleted texts. Carried on with her.

Nothing changes if nothing changes.

posts: 773   ·   registered: Aug. 15th, 2019   ·   location: Michigan
id 8744585
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 WhatsRight (original poster member #35417) posted at 12:54 AM on Thursday, July 14th, 2022

Oh, yes ma’am!

Thank you! ❤️

"Noone can make you feel inferior without your concent." Eleanor Roosevelt

I will not be vanquished. Rose Kennedy

posts: 7542   ·   registered: Apr. 23rd, 2012   ·   location: Southeast USA
id 8744594
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zebra25 ( member #29431) posted at 2:09 AM on Thursday, July 14th, 2022

Praying for you and your family.

"Don't let anyone who hasn't been in your shoes tell you how to tie your laces."

D-day April 2010

posts: 2865   ·   registered: Aug. 25th, 2010
id 8744598
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 WhatsRight (original poster member #35417) posted at 2:17 AM on Thursday, July 14th, 2022

Thanks so much!!!!!

"Noone can make you feel inferior without your concent." Eleanor Roosevelt

I will not be vanquished. Rose Kennedy

posts: 7542   ·   registered: Apr. 23rd, 2012   ·   location: Southeast USA
id 8744599
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BearlyBreathing ( member #55075) posted at 2:39 AM on Thursday, July 14th, 2022

Well darn. I’m sending out all the good vibes I can —-

Me: BS 55 (49 on d-day)Him: WH. 64. D-Day 8/15/2016 LTA. Kinda liking my new life :-)

**horrible typist, lots of edits to correct. :-/ **

posts: 4886   ·   registered: Sep. 10th, 2016   ·   location: Northern CA
id 8744602
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 WhatsRight (original poster member #35417) posted at 2:48 PM on Thursday, July 14th, 2022

So…we stayed in the ER all night - still here. Not so much because of his condition but because there are no rooms available. Should get a room today.

CT showed no obstruction. I think that is what our PCP was most concerned about. BP was low when we came in, but is high now. (173/100)

I am really concerned about the vomiting and nausea /and testing + for blood when he was in the hospital 4 days ago. I am going to push for a scope to check on his esophagus and stomach for new ulcerations so we can treat that.

They are now concerned about cDiff. Have to get a sample to test. I guess that means a scope/probe of some kind. Scan showed there is nothing nearby to sample. 😏. There is no strong smell at this point, and I understand that there is a definite strong odor to cDiff. So maybe that is good news. 🙏

He is very sensitive re cDiff. His mom died of cDiff. He mentioned again this morning that they were focusing on testing for cDiff. I told him I was glad they are doing it now when it is early. That his mom had it really bad by the time they knew. But, of course, I’m scared.

Hopefully we will get some answers today. Thanks so much for all of your prayers / good thoughts. ❤️

"Noone can make you feel inferior without your concent." Eleanor Roosevelt

I will not be vanquished. Rose Kennedy

posts: 7542   ·   registered: Apr. 23rd, 2012   ·   location: Southeast USA
id 8744626
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wildbananas ( member #10552) posted at 3:43 PM on Thursday, July 14th, 2022

Thinking of you all, WR. (((WR)))

Travel light, live light, spread the light, be the light. ~ Yogi Bhajan

posts: 16555   ·   registered: May. 1st, 2006   ·   location: Somewhere
id 8744638
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Jeaniegirl ( member #6370) posted at 7:41 PM on Thursday, July 14th, 2022

Whatsright, at least I hope you have managed to get you and your H into a regular room by now. Cannot imagine trying to rest in ER. Fingers crossed about the C-dif, that is dangerous stuff. My aunt had that in the nursing home and it took a while to clear up. Catching it early should really help.

As usual, hang in there!

"Because I deserve better"

posts: 3236   ·   registered: Feb. 1st, 2005
id 8744668
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tushnurse ( member #21101) posted at 11:44 PM on Thursday, July 14th, 2022

Oh honey I'm so sorry you are going through it right now.

His BP was probably low this time from dehydration. If there's no gas in the tank there's no way to make the motor run.

I hope you get answers and treatment soon.

Me: FBS
Him: FWS
Kids: 22 & 25
Married for 30 years now, was 16 at the time.
D-Day Sept 26 2008
R'd in about 2 years. Old Vet now.

posts: 19420   ·   registered: Oct. 1st, 2008   ·   location: St. Louis
id 8744705
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 WhatsRight (original poster member #35417) posted at 12:42 AM on Friday, July 15th, 2022

We got an actual room, so that’s a plus

Still NPO. And had an enema.

BP is now high. 210/115. 🤷‍♀️

Saw the gastric guy and he said he will do an endoscopy tomorrow to check on his esophagus and stomach to try to get to the bottom of the pain.

Also, they are wanting to do some type of scope to get a sample to test for cDiff.

The pain medicine has finally kicked in and he is resting peacefully. Fingers crossed that he will get a good nights rest. He is so sad that he can’t have any water. He is a water freak.

He will also maybe have the endoscopy tomorrow as well. He hopes they will be on the same day because he hates to go without water and food for more than one day. 🤣

He told me today that he was so very tired of hurting. I told him that I understand completely why he would feel that way. But I told him if he wants to move forward with his life, he needs to understand that he has a new normal now. It will be no more businesses to start and no more gold medals to win. His challenges will be getting up in the morning and having meals with, and spending time with family. Maybe having friends over. Getting back to church. That sort of thing. And if at this point in his life, with the health issues he is facing, he can accomplish those kind of things… That should be very rewarding for him.

He didn’t really answer, but I could tell he was listening.

Came back from grabbing a sandwich from nearby and got an amazing parking spot! That will keep me happy for the evening!

I know, I’m easy.😊😊😊

"Noone can make you feel inferior without your concent." Eleanor Roosevelt

I will not be vanquished. Rose Kennedy

posts: 7542   ·   registered: Apr. 23rd, 2012   ·   location: Southeast USA
id 8744713
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 WhatsRight (original poster member #35417) posted at 10:50 AM on Friday, July 15th, 2022

Well, now my H is in isolation. And, by proximity, so am I. They sent a sample to be tested off site for cDiff. No idea how long that will take.

In the middle of the night I was turning H and the bed alarm went off. So they came to the door and ask him if he was trying to get up. 🙄. Yeah, c 5-6 quad "getting up". Anyway, the nurse stood at the door and talked me through resetting the bed alarm.

I asked if I could leave the room, considering the isolation, and she said yes, if I washed my hands and had a mask on.

But they wear gowns and gloves when they come in here. And I don’t. Hmmmm.

So I was going to sit with a friend and her PREGNANT daughter today while her H is having brain surgery. Again, they say I can leave the room with a mask and washed hands. But I am concerned about being ANYWHERE near her daughter. Or even the mom, because she will go back to the room with her H - post BRAIN surgery.

Any medical peeps here to advise me???

At the very least, I will tell them so they can make their own decision, but I think I may not get anywhere near them no matter what they tell me.

Well, this is not boring. There’s that.

"Noone can make you feel inferior without your concent." Eleanor Roosevelt

I will not be vanquished. Rose Kennedy

posts: 7542   ·   registered: Apr. 23rd, 2012   ·   location: Southeast USA
id 8744775
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tushnurse ( member #21101) posted at 1:27 PM on Friday, July 15th, 2022

You are fine.
They gown and glove because they go from his room to some other poor soul that has not immunes system's, so they are protecting the other patients more so than themselves.
He also is on what it sounds like is preventative, or presumptive isolation, if the C dif is negative they will most likely stop it. But policy now is to start isolation until you know you don't have the suspected germ.

Everyone, you, me, your kids, your grand kid, have C Dif, it is a NORMAL bacteria in the gut. HOWEVER when it turns into an infection is usually after more than one type of antibiotic treatment, where the antibiotics not only kill the germs of the initial cause of infection but other good bacteria that are in your gut. That allows the C Dif bacteria to overgrow, and take over. There are very specific antibiotics used to treat it as well. Vancomycin orally being the gold standard.

So yes, wash your hands, make sure you don't get any stool on you if you change him, and you will be fine. It is not airborne, it is a contact to contact transmission, but if you are weak, sick, or have a compromised immune system it can ramp up, especially if you have had it before. So that is why the hospitals use isolation measures.

Me: FBS
Him: FWS
Kids: 22 & 25
Married for 30 years now, was 16 at the time.
D-Day Sept 26 2008
R'd in about 2 years. Old Vet now.

posts: 19420   ·   registered: Oct. 1st, 2008   ·   location: St. Louis
id 8744812
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