Newest Member: girlangry89

Just Found Out :
Boundaries and Consequences 101 for all new BS

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nekorb ( Member #40306) posted at 1:04 PM on Saturday, February 22nd, 2014

Great post.

Up thread someone asked for examples of consequences of boundaries. I could use some examples too.

Thanks.

Me: BS 44; Him: WH 47 M - 22 Years
D-day: 7/2013; D filed 7/2014; Divorced 7-27-16
...the WS affair starts off in a dreamland where everything is all Golly, Wow! and Meant To Be! and Soul Mates drop from the trees to frolic in the mist. -devotedman

posts: 5695   ·   registered: Aug. 13th, 2013
id 6696710
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 lordhasaplan? (original poster Member #30079) posted at 4:33 PM on Saturday, February 22nd, 2014

Neorb,

Consequences can range from deal breaker divorce. To additional IC, sleep on couch, separation, setting up MC, additional gives like chores, planning additional date nights, scheduling couples weekend, etc. not everything needs to none a deal breaker, but they should engage and give more. Hope that helps.

BS- Me (45)
D-day: 5/18/10, lies and TT till (11/26/10).
Currently in R.
Don't carry others crap. It's your job to fix yourself, not your spouse.

posts: 2104   ·   registered: Nov. 10th, 2010
id 6696951
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hard_yards ( Member #23549) posted at 6:15 PM on Tuesday, February 25th, 2014

bump


I feel like I'm in a parallel universe... everything looks the same... but something's just not right...

posts: 1383   ·   registered: Apr. 8th, 2009
id 6700751
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norabird ( Member #42092) posted at 4:36 PM on Thursday, March 6th, 2014

bump

Sit. Feast on your life.

posts: 4324   ·   registered: Jan. 16th, 2014   ·   location: NYC
id 6712812
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undonelife ( Member #38421) posted at 6:46 PM on Thursday, March 6th, 2014

Bump

Me: BS 59 Him: WH 57
M: 34 years
DDay 1 1986 EA Confessed,Rugswept
DDay 2 11/25/2012 EA/PA Caught
TT 9/9/13 Lies,Pictures
OW:20 yrs younger M-CwOW

posts: 228   ·   registered: Feb. 10th, 2013
id 6713020
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Lyonesse ( Member #32943) posted at 11:19 PM on Saturday, March 8th, 2014

bump

Me: BS, 40's.

posts: 1956   ·   registered: Jul. 29th, 2011   ·   location: West Coast
id 6716000
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Simple ( Member #18814) posted at 9:44 PM on Thursday, March 13th, 2014

bump

Love is a choice.

True love is harder to come by than soul mates. True love requires work.

Ignorance can be cured with knowledge. There is no cure for being an idiot.

-October 3, 2007-

posts: 942   ·   registered: Mar. 25th, 2008
id 6722030
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yearsofpain25 ( Member #42012) posted at 2:05 PM on Saturday, March 15th, 2014

Bump

"I remind myself of this. I am a survivor. I have taken all this world has dished out and am still here. So there is no reason to be afraid. Whatever happens, I will survive. So now onto living. It is time for me to thrive." - DrJekyll

posts: 4517   ·   registered: Jan. 11th, 2014   ·   location: Northeast US
id 6723915
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tushnurse ( Member #21101) posted at 9:11 PM on Wednesday, March 19th, 2014

bump

Me: FBS
Him: FWS
Kids: 21 &23
Married for 28 years now, was 16 at the time.
D-Day Sept 26 2008
R'd in about 2 years. Old Vet now.

posts: 18935   ·   registered: Oct. 1st, 2008   ·   location: St. Louis
id 6728969
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bluelightshine ( Member #37539) posted at 5:59 AM on Friday, March 21st, 2014

Bump

BS(Me) 32
SAWH (Beaker) 35
Married 11 Years
Dday Oct 06 2012
Dday 2 February 19 2014
Confessed to getting blow jobs from
prostitutes in 2006 and while living with OW
PA/EA 1 year
In r
2 children under 10
Working on faith everyday.


posts: 66   ·   registered: Nov. 18th, 2012
id 6730592
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tushnurse ( Member #21101) posted at 2:22 AM on Tuesday, March 25th, 2014

Bump

Me: FBS
Him: FWS
Kids: 21 &23
Married for 28 years now, was 16 at the time.
D-Day Sept 26 2008
R'd in about 2 years. Old Vet now.

posts: 18935   ·   registered: Oct. 1st, 2008   ·   location: St. Louis
id 6734825
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tushnurse ( Member #21101) posted at 4:45 PM on Thursday, March 27th, 2014

bump

Me: FBS
Him: FWS
Kids: 21 &23
Married for 28 years now, was 16 at the time.
D-Day Sept 26 2008
R'd in about 2 years. Old Vet now.

posts: 18935   ·   registered: Oct. 1st, 2008   ·   location: St. Louis
id 6738132
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Simple ( Member #18814) posted at 11:03 PM on Thursday, March 27th, 2014

bump

Love is a choice.

True love is harder to come by than soul mates. True love requires work.

Ignorance can be cured with knowledge. There is no cure for being an idiot.

-October 3, 2007-

posts: 942   ·   registered: Mar. 25th, 2008
id 6738655
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Simple ( Member #18814) posted at 10:09 PM on Friday, March 28th, 2014

bump

Love is a choice.

True love is harder to come by than soul mates. True love requires work.

Ignorance can be cured with knowledge. There is no cure for being an idiot.

-October 3, 2007-

posts: 942   ·   registered: Mar. 25th, 2008
id 6739925
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jjct ( Member #17484) posted at 3:52 PM on Sunday, March 30th, 2014

BOMP

posts: 7269   ·   registered: Dec. 24th, 2007   ·   location: texas
id 6741383
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tushnurse ( Member #21101) posted at 6:32 PM on Thursday, April 3rd, 2014

bump

Me: FBS
Him: FWS
Kids: 21 &23
Married for 28 years now, was 16 at the time.
D-Day Sept 26 2008
R'd in about 2 years. Old Vet now.

posts: 18935   ·   registered: Oct. 1st, 2008   ·   location: St. Louis
id 6746607
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thisissogross ( Member #30294) posted at 6:29 AM on Sunday, April 6th, 2014



i edit frequently because i have to

posts: 364   ·   registered: Dec. 3rd, 2010   ·   location: southern us
id 6749751
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tushnurse ( Member #21101) posted at 2:30 PM on Wednesday, April 9th, 2014

Me: FBS
Him: FWS
Kids: 21 &23
Married for 28 years now, was 16 at the time.
D-Day Sept 26 2008
R'd in about 2 years. Old Vet now.

posts: 18935   ·   registered: Oct. 1st, 2008   ·   location: St. Louis
id 6753462
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Simple ( Member #18814) posted at 12:27 AM on Saturday, April 12th, 2014

bump

Love is a choice.

True love is harder to come by than soul mates. True love requires work.

Ignorance can be cured with knowledge. There is no cure for being an idiot.

-October 3, 2007-

posts: 942   ·   registered: Mar. 25th, 2008
id 6756815
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kernel ( Member #27035) posted at 8:26 PM on Sunday, April 13th, 2014

bump

"On particularly rough days when I'm sure I can't possibly endure, I like to remind myself that my track record for getting through bad days so far is 100% and that's pretty good."

posts: 5379   ·   registered: Jan. 3rd, 2010   ·   location: Midwest
id 6758066
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