Every morning a wife wakes up after having not slept well at all for the last 3 months.
She's lost 20 pounds because she doesn't have an appetite. She's feeling weak and has a headache again.... probably too much stress.
Next to her, her husband is asleep. This man is everything to her.
She gets up quietly as to not disturb her sleeping husband--- he works so hard and needs his rest more than her.... And yesterday he berated her for being too noisy at 5 am when she was tossing and turning, because of the nightmare of scenarios in her head. they won;t go away. she can't stop thinking. her mind races all day and all night.
She sits down on the toilet, but there's nothing. She's not had any food in 3 days. Last time she ate she vomitted. She opens facebook on her phone and sighs in despair..... Husband's phone is active with a green light.... he must have woken up when she left to the bathroom.
She finishes in the bathroom, and runs the sink a few extra seconds so her husband knows she's done. and returns to the bedroom.
Husband is still asleep=== but his phone is tucked under him now out of reach again-- he must have moved it from the charger. She wishes she knew the password to his phone, but he changed it.... and accused her of being absuive when she meekly asked about it.
She stares longingly at the love of her life, and wonders what changed. Was it her fault? She tries to be pleasant, and even started working out, but her husband seems to have lost all interest in her. Nothing she does seems to help, it only makes things worse.... he nags at her constantly... it's been 6 months since they had sex. She got a UTI, and he had accused her of cheating on him... but that of course wasn't true.
They don't go on dates anymore... Husband is always working late. She tries calling him after work, but he always sends her to voicemail.
She heads downstairs to make her husband breakfast and pack a lunch. Yesterday, she made his favorite (meatloaf) and packed a note that said "thinking of you" She finds his lunchbox and empties it. He didn;t eat any of it yesterday... the note is still folded up. Probably he was too busy and he didn't see it. She writes a new small note to slip into his lunch. it just says "I miss us. <3"
Her husband comes downstairs, and complains that the coffee isn't made. I guess he didn't notice the haircut that she got yesterday for him... or the new pajamas. He didn;t even look at her... He's on his phone again, texting someone. He smiles and laughs. She asks him what was funny, and he bites at her that she's always invading his privacy.
Who is he texting? Is there another woman? Why is he so distant? Why doesn't he text me anymore? When did this all change? Where was he last night? Why was there condoms under the seat of his car? Who can I turn to for answers? I'm so lost. I'm so hurt. But i love him. He'd never do this to me right? we're special! How am i going to make it through this day. God, please help me.
She makes a decision that today she will try even harder to be a good wife..... today will be different. He'll come back, you'll see.
you might think OBS is living in true ignorant bliss a happy and fulfilled life full of contentment.... but I VERY VERY much doubt it. It's much more likely she's been locked in her own personal hell with no escape and no one to help her. And YOU are content keeping her there. As far as I am concerned, this is an EVIL choice you've made.
And this is on top of the reasons we've given you all over how this will HELP YOU.
[This message edited by swoned at 7:03 PM, Thursday, May 25th]