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Marz ( member #60895) posted at 9:52 PM on Tuesday, October 5th, 2021
I’d stay out of the mother/son issue and let them work it out.
Aletheia ( member #79172) posted at 9:58 PM on Tuesday, October 5th, 2021
TWO -
Phew. But did she tell you why she said nothing to you if she knew?
Bigger ( Attaché #8354) posted at 12:34 PM on Wednesday, October 6th, 2021
Be careful.
The goal is to get out of infidelity. The goal isn’t divorce – that’s just a tool to help you get out of infidelity.
If your actions and thoughts are controlled or majorly impacted by actions your wife could or could not be doing… you are still in infidelity. Divorce is not really an alternative form of relationship with your wife. It’s more of a non-relationship.
Granted you have your son in common and that creates a need for some interaction, but that should/could be minimal.
Work at detaching. You don’t want (or need) to feel hate or sorry or sympathy or resentment for your ex wife. You want to feel indifferent.
"If, therefore, any be unhappy, let him remember that he is unhappy by reason of himself alone." Epictetus
TheWrongOne (original poster member #78753) posted at 5:56 PM on Wednesday, October 13th, 2021
So I wanted to update and say that I did take that receptionist out for coffee over the weekend and it went really well. We talked for a couple of hours and I am taking her on a real date again this weekend. She is sweet and sexy and I can't wait. I'm as giddy as a schoolboy.
The XWW did reach out to me via a text from someone else's phone over the weekend. "Telling M...'s wife about what we did was not right. Now his marriage is ruined. Hope you feel good about yourself."
I just answered back "Aw poor petunia. The chickens are coming home to roost and shitting all over your head huh?" " and left it at that.
[This message edited by TheWrongOne at 5:57 PM, Wednesday, October 13th]
Happenedtome2 ( member #68906) posted at 6:11 PM on Wednesday, October 13th, 2021
Have a great time with the new lady and...well....petunia can go scratch
BH DDay August 2018 :https://www.survivinginfidelity.com/forums.asp?tid=633451
asc1226 ( member #75363) posted at 6:29 PM on Wednesday, October 13th, 2021
"Telling M...'s wife about what we did was not right. Now his marriage is ruined. Hope you feel good about yourself."
Accountability is definitely not her strong point. For the sake of of her future partners, maybe she could confine herself to men in open relationships. Like wide open. The fewer the rules the better.
I make edits, words is hard
BlueRaspberry ( member #76065) posted at 7:08 PM on Wednesday, October 13th, 2021
TheWrongOne,
The XWW did reach out to me via a text from someone else's phone over the weekend. "Telling M...'s wife about what we did was not right. Now his marriage is ruined. Hope you feel good about yourself."
Your XW is a real piece of work. She voluntarily destroyed two marriages but you simply telling the truth is "not right". Wow. Just wow. By the way, his marriage was ruined anyway since the OBS was aware of multiple infidelities with other partners. Perhaps you XW should get an STD test since she was one of many side pieces for Romeo. The fact that she is a preacher's daughter is unbelievable. What a paragon of morality...
Thumos ( member #69668) posted at 7:29 PM on Wednesday, October 13th, 2021
Blaming you for the marriage she actually wrecked. That's rich. Some classic wayward logic there, and yet more confirmation you are on the right path getting free and clear from her.
She sent you that text more than likely bc her AP is probably running away from her and telling her he is going to try to salvage his marriage. So her options suddenly have dried up.
"True character is revealed in the choices a human being makes under pressure. The greater the pressure, the deeper the revelation, the truer the choice to the character's essential nature."
BH: 50, WW: 49 Wed: Feb.'96 DDAY1: 12.20.16 DDAY2: 12.23.19
Marz ( member #60895) posted at 7:32 PM on Wednesday, October 13th, 2021
The truth getting out will probably get you some closure. You did the right thing in informing the other spouse. Now that’s done it should help you move on.
Let poor muffin deal with her choices.
Sounds like you’ve got her blocked. Your son is an adult so there’s no need for any interaction going forward.
guvensiz ( member #75858) posted at 8:58 PM on Wednesday, October 13th, 2021
Hope you feel good about yourself.
Did she have any doubts about it?
Of course, this is something that will make you feel amazing.
Good luck with new lady.
src9043 ( member #75367) posted at 9:08 PM on Wednesday, October 13th, 2021
M1965 ( member #57009) posted at 9:27 PM on Wednesday, October 13th, 2021
As somebody here wrote recently, "No-one is the villain in their own story". Your wife cheated on you twice. Her latest AP cheated on his wife with more women than just your wife. And now your ex-WW feels qualified to scold you in matters of conscience? It is mind-boggling. And to ask you to feel bad because her AP's marriage is 'ruined'? Unbelievable. How troubled do she and the AP feel about blowing your marriage out of the water?
You couldn't make this stuff up. You did the right thing, and the cheaters are p*ssed about facing the consequences of their actions.
[This message edited by M1965 at 9:28 PM, Wednesday, October 13th]
SnowToArmPits ( member #50943) posted at 11:07 PM on Wednesday, October 13th, 2021
I just answered back "Aw poor petunia. The chickens are coming home to roost and shitting all over your head huh?"
Buffer ( member #71664) posted at 11:17 PM on Wednesday, October 13th, 2021
Good comeback to ex w
[This message edited by Buffer at 11:27 PM, Wednesday, October 13th]
HalfTime2017 ( member #64366) posted at 11:57 PM on Wednesday, October 13th, 2021
Awesome update.
Karma is best served with Petunias
Amazing how you ruined their marriage, when your WW chose to spread her legs.
Marz ( member #60895) posted at 12:08 AM on Thursday, October 14th, 2021
Petunia was just doing Gods will. I bet daddy is beside him as muffins world implodes.
[This message edited by Marz at 12:09 AM, Thursday, October 14th]
TheWrongOne (original poster member #78753) posted at 1:03 AM on Thursday, October 14th, 2021
Sickens me that this woman goes to church nd acts all godly. Blech!
LostInHisFog ( member #78503) posted at 1:20 AM on Thursday, October 14th, 2021
The XWW did reach out to me via a text from someone else's phone over the weekend. "Telling M...'s wife about what we did was not right. Now his marriage is ruined. Hope you feel good about yourself."
If we had a dollar for every time a wayward blames the destruction of APs marriage on us (BS) when we contact the OBS we would have enough money to not only not be scared of starting a new life but to help all the other BS legal fees moving forward.
Goodness, I can't even, truly head firmly in the clouds your WW.
[This message edited by LostInHisFog at 1:21 AM, Thursday, October 14th]
They can make as many promises as they want, but if they don't put action behind it, it doesn't mean anything.
I edit because I'm fluent in typo & autocorrect hates me.
ramius ( member #44750) posted at 7:34 AM on Thursday, October 14th, 2021
Cheaters, nothing if not predictable.
How dare they suffer consequences for acting in such a horrid way.
How many scars have you rationalized because you loved the person who was holding the knife?
Their actions reveal their intentions. Their words conceal them.
OrdinaryDude ( member #55676) posted at 11:49 AM on Thursday, October 14th, 2021
Sickens me that this woman goes to church nd acts all godly. Blech!
Exactly why I no longer have anything to do with church.
Other than a wedding or funeral, I’ll have nothing to do with it.
I was young and dumb and stayed with a cheater.
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