KingRat posted 10/31/2019 14:27 PM

Please help me to help him heal from this. I don't know what to do?????

I am going to accept everything you said as being true. In doing that, it still does not really make a bit of difference regarding the outcome.

Through the body of your post, it seems like you are asking us how to convince him that your intentions were innocent and that he should not feel the way he feels. The thing is, there is no standard governing feelings. They just are. It doesn't matter if we say he is right or wrong. His boundaries are his boundaries. He is entitled to feel what you did is inappropriate and worthy of divorce despite your belief to the contrary. It doesn't make a lick of difference to his feelings what some anonymous strangers say over the internet.

One thing I will point out: A public nude beach and sending a private nude text are not equivalent. I'm assuming you threw the nude beach part out there to demonstrate your nonchalant feelings about nudity. But the difference is that a nude beach is out in the open with members of both sexes. This was sent in private and not meant to be shared or known by anyone, hence your instruction to immediately delete. If you were ok with it, why did you instruct him to delete? The only logically explanation is you had reason to believe that others, especially your husband would not be ok with it. You must at least acknowledge that you "honestly didn't think at all" is disingenuous at best.