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silverhopes (original poster member #32753) posted at 5:45 AM on Wednesday, December 5th, 2018
OK, this is a kind of tongue-in-cheek topic for me, but I am curious...
1) Why do people hate millennials so much?
2) What can millennials do or not do to be less hateable?
Please be as honest as you want to. This particular millennial does not take offense easily. I'll listen... and I'll probably laugh my ass off.
Aut viam inveniam aut faciam.
thebighurt ( member #34722) posted at 7:49 AM on Wednesday, December 5th, 2018
I am retired but read and hear that people they work with say millennials feel entitled, such as they really don't want to do anything to earn their pay, think they deserve whatever time they want to take for lunch, breaks, etc., and should get top pay for not doing it.
From personal experience, I can say that two of my favorite people are millennials who are still paying for their own education, work very hard and take care of what they have. They know life isn't handing things out; that you have to earn it.
It's the same as other situations; it depends on whether you actually know someone or go with a generalization from what you have heard. And we know we can get flagged for that on SI!
Finding what life could have been....... Why didn't I see it?
HardenMyHeart ( member #15902) posted at 8:00 AM on Wednesday, December 5th, 2018
Personally, I don't know anyone that "hates" millennials. I think most people judge others based on their character, not the age group they belong to.
In my opinion, there is far too much generalization going on based on race, gender, religion, sexual orientation, to name a few areas. Just apply common sense, along with the golden rule, and the world be a much happier place. Treat everyone with respect, kindness and compassion. Be patient and have tolerance for those you disagree with. This applies to everyone, not just millenials.
Me: BH, Her: WW, Married 40 years, Reconciled
Lionne ( member #25560) posted at 11:35 AM on Wednesday, December 5th, 2018
Some of my best friends are millennials, lol. Others are elderly,in their 90s, some are my ageish.
I don't like racists, intolerant people, unremorseful cheaters, and mushrooms.
Millennials (and others) can't be generalized.
Me-BS-71 in May HIM-SAFWH-74 I just wanted a normal life.Normal trauma would have been appreciated.
Lionne ( member #25560) posted at 11:35 AM on Wednesday, December 5th, 2018
Some of my best friends are millennials, lol. Others are elderly,in their 90s, some are my ageish.
I don't like racists, intolerant people, unremorseful cheaters, and mushrooms.
Millennials (and others) can't be generalized.
Me-BS-71 in May HIM-SAFWH-74 I just wanted a normal life.Normal trauma would have been appreciated.
tushnurse ( member #21101) posted at 1:23 PM on Wednesday, December 5th, 2018
Well others are taking the high road and not generalizing.
I will throw out my personal experience with them, as I work with quite a few.
1. Entitlement - Many present as being entitled, and not knowing what hard work is and that it is required to get ahead in life. Often strolling into work sometime after 9 am. Taking more than an hour for lunch, and then leaving at 3:30 or 4pm. When traveling for work, not doing any of their normal required daily tasks, "Because I am traveling".
When given extra projects or being held accountable, doing anything and everything they can to get out of the work, or half assing it.
2. Butt Hurt - Many of these people also get their feelings hurt when constructive criticism is provided. Many feel that it is unfair, or hurtful to call people out for their actions.
These are the two things I struggle with some of the millennial individuals I work with. NOT all are like this, but lemme say it's a lot more common among them than it ever was in any other age group I have worked with.
Me: FBSHim: FWSKids: 23 & 27 Married for 32 years now, was 16 at the time.D-Day Sept 26 2008R'd in about 2 years. Old Vet now.
devotedman ( member #45441) posted at 2:24 PM on Wednesday, December 5th, 2018
I echo what tushnurse says. I work in the utility sector and some millennials do seem to be less productive.
On the other hand, many also step up and do their jobs.
Really, analyzing these social and societal impacts of parental attitudes and quality and way of life on our new generations is quite interesting.
Me: 2xBS b 1962 xWW after 2 decades, xWGF after almost 1.
Amelia Pond: Who are you?
The Doctor: I don't know yet. I'm still cooking.
ENFP-A. Huh.
DragnHeart ( member #32122) posted at 2:32 PM on Wednesday, December 5th, 2018
What is the millennial age group?
WH works in construction/manufacturing. The work is very physical but most construction is. Hours have finally been cut back from 60+/week down to just over 50 hrs.
They always seem to be short staffed despite new hires coming in at least twice a month. These new hires are usually in their twenties.
Many times Wh has said that the new hire walked out for lunch and never came back. Many never finish a full week.
One guy was on day three, walked up to the manager's office, told him he was quitting as this wasn't the work he wanted and then asked for his pay check...
Another, who was the bf of one of the other guys sister, quit, went home crying telling his mom that the work was just to much and he wanted to go back to McDonald's...
Even the guys who have worked there since WH started but again in this age group, seem to think texting on their phones while on the floor is ok. Taking 45min bathroom breaks. Everyone got their forklift tickets yet no one will go bring in lumber when they need it if the yard guy is loading a truck.
Entitlement yes.
Lazy, hell yes.
"Not my problem" attitude yes.
Of course there also a few 30+ yr olds like that too. There's also a few young guys who are working hogs and like WH just go go go. But they are fewer. And I'm not being sexist, there's no woman at this location so I can't judge from that standpoint.
There's been a shift from working hard to people not wanting to work at all.
Me: BS 46 WH: 37 (BrokenHeart911)Four little dragons. Met 2006. Married 2008. Dday of LTPA with co worker October 19th 2010. Knew about EA with ow1 before that. Now up to PA #5. Serial fucking Cheater.
silverhopes (original poster member #32753) posted at 2:40 PM on Wednesday, December 5th, 2018
What is the millennial age group?
From what I've read, it seems to be folks born between 1982 and 2000 - named such for the high school graduating class of 2000 (who would be born in 1982). But different sources have different ranges, and some folks at the beginning of that range vehemently insist that they're Xennials.
Thank you everyone! I am finding these responses very informative.
Aut viam inveniam aut faciam.
Catwoman ( member #1330) posted at 2:50 PM on Wednesday, December 5th, 2018
I mentored a millennial for close to two years.
Entitled? Very much so. Strolled in at 9:45 and left at 4:30 every day when I was in at 7:30 and often left after her.
She rarely asked for help with anything, which meant she made mistakes. Mistakes happen--I'm okay with that. I'm not okay with her not seeking guidance when she felt confused or had a question.
I made arrangements for her to spend a day in a manufacturing facility (we were manufacturing buyers) in hopes that it would help her understand the business better. She didn't ask one single question in the 6-7 hours she was there. Not one.
I never felt she wanted to master this skill set. My gut feeling was that she was content being a button puncher and not really wanting to learn the business and take her skills up the ladder.
Nice kid, but I never got the feeling she would push herself to work hard.
Seems I wasn't the only one that felt that way--we had a RIF about 1.5 years ago and she was affected. I feel if she had perhaps shown some spark and drive that she may have been retained.
I won't tar everyone with the same brush, but as a group I believe these people could be better. Some are, certainly. Many are not.
Cat
PS: A top of the line buyer in my profession makes really excellent money--I can't understand why someone wouldn't want to challenge themselves to master this skill set.
FBS: Married 20 years, 2 daughters 27 and 24. Divorced by the grace of GOD.
D-Days: 2/23/93; 10/11/97; 3/5/03
Ex & OW Broke up 12-10
"An erection does not count as personal growth."
wildbananas ( member #10552) posted at 3:42 PM on Wednesday, December 5th, 2018
I'm a team lead (basically assistant manager) and there are several millennials in my department. Every one of them is bright and a good worker. But I definitely see a mindset that I (Gen X, just as an FYI) don't have. They tend to want to be flexible with work time to fit their schedule, not the other way around. They don't think twice about announcing they're coming in late/making up time later/working at home because they have a headache... I was raised your hours are X. If you need some sort of accommodation, you ask your manager first. You don't just text in the AM and announce what you're doing.
I know it drives my boss crazy at times. But like I said, these guys are all bright and get their job done and I think that gives them a bit of leeway.
Travel light, live light, spread the light, be the light. ~ Yogi Bhajan
TheCaterpillar ( member #49827) posted at 3:54 PM on Wednesday, December 5th, 2018
I think a lot of it is lazy journalism. It's too easy to just apply the "Pfft Kids today" mentality. I suspect this has happened to other generations in the past and will happen to future generations too. I'm sure Gen Z-ers feel the same.
There are some rubbishy traits I've seen in millennial but a lot of the complaints levied in the media are nonsense. My dad said the reason a lot of millennial can't afford houses is because they waste money on luxuries like phones/avo toast etc. My parents married at 22 when they graduated their FREE university courses. On a NQT and apprentice engineer salary they could afford a deposit on a house so were able to pay a mortgage each month instead of rent because property prices were cheaper in proportion to earnings. WRT to waste on luxuries....they used wedding money to buy "good china" and "good silverware". Each generation probably spends money on things that other age groups might not understand.
The work entitlement lunchbreak thing probably varies massively between sectors. Most of the jobs I've worked have been timecarded so lunchbreaks are kept to minimum (Half an hour mandated) to maximise earnings. My first 2 jobs out of uni both firms were havign a crack down on smoking breaks. HR saying nicotine is addictive, workers have a right to smoke. Again, this is just my experience, but in my last 3 jobs the people my age were much less likely to be smokers. The ones taking the piss with smoke breaks tended to be the "old boys" who'd worked with the same firm for 30 years and were entitled to take more smoke breaks because they used to be able to smoke at their desk until these "stoooopin 'elf and safety rules" prevented them from doing so. But that's only one small sample on one small issue.
I graduated in 2008 (hi financial crisis and most of the businesses in my hometown either closing or downsizing). I was fortunate to get an entry level job with a large engineering firm but many of my friends were all expected to take unpaid internships because they didn't have experience for an entry level job (though the point of entry is that you're entering the job market so don't have much experience). As a result many had to move back in with parent/grandparents as they weren't earning. It's very demoralising, I can see how people in that situation who were not fortunate to ahve family support or have access to university education it may have been harder. That said, I'm only describing the experience of some of my friends. I believe I'm considered "an old millennial" by some of the rules (born 1987) but honestly when someone says millennial I think of people younger than me. I was always a bit unclear of the definition of a millennial and it's never used in a positive light (headlines have included Millennials are ruining marriage, divorce, paper towel industry, eating too many avocados, not buying enough diamonds....the list goes on) so you can't blame me for not using it for myself!
Lionne - Don't be such a fungus-facist! You shouldn't generalise. Mushrooms are amazingly versatile, you just haven't found the right variety/type of mushroom yet.
silverhopes (original poster member #32753) posted at 3:54 PM on Wednesday, December 5th, 2018
I'm curious to know, what sort of flexibility do millennials expect? WB, you said headaches as a good example... What are some others? Is it childcare related? Health appointment related? Mental health days? etc.
Are more millennials having or citing mental illness diagnoses than previous generations?
Also, on the subject of childcare: are you guys seeing differences in how millennials raise their children in terms of how they balance their professions? Has it changed? Are there ways you think millennials could balance childcare and work more effectively? How did generations before do it (did one parent stay at home? Or work part-time hours that fit in with childcare, and if so what sorts of professions were those?), and would those same ways work now?
Thank you all for your patience in answering my questions.
Aut viam inveniam aut faciam.
silverhopes (original poster member #32753) posted at 4:17 PM on Wednesday, December 5th, 2018
My parents married at 22 when they graduated their FREE university courses.
This is true. Costs have changed.
I wonder, just how much the costs of college have increased since the previous generation... Not to mention the cost of food, the cost of apartments and houses, the cost of land (if there's any left that isn't already bought). And I wonder how the average pay stacks up to that.
Like you, Caterpillar, I graduated college in 2008. I had a BA in environmental studies and went on to become a Park Ranger - this was after about 9 years of doing different work, both professionally and voluntarily, in the National Park I became a Ranger for. I was considered to have the experience and background they were looking for.
Then I learned that having a BA wasn't enough. In order to attain a permanent position with benefits, I would need a master's degree in something. The only way I was permitted to continue working at my seasonal Ranger position (I would have to reapply each season) would be if I were carrying 10 credits per semester while being employed full-time as a Ranger. So, 2 classes plus a full-time job, with no foreseeable end in sight, until and unless I got a master's.
Then, unfortunately, about a year after I began doing my work - and by the way, being a Ranger had been my dream job for years, and even with the extra hooks in it, I didn't want to leave! - my mental illness caught up with me. I'd been fighting through it since I was 10 years old, and I finally got overwhelmed by it. I have been disabled ever since.
Do I feel ashamed? You bet. I value work ethic. I feel terrible that I'm not contributing to society. Many friends and family members have judged me for this, and I feel they're right to do so. For right now, I am doing volunteer work, again at that National Park I love so dearly, and also teaching a small garden class for a local preschool. Sometimes I have to remember that mental illness isn't the same thing as being lazy or a slacker. But it helps to know the standards others expect so that I can hope to reach them someday, if I train myself to do so little by little. I do eventually hope to return to work, once I have a handle on my health, so it would be good to remain caught up with the times.
My situation is a bit unusual, but I am very interested to know how society sees millennials, what society's expectations of us are, and how we can get there. Also, what challenges we might be facing to do so, and how we can fix those.
[This message edited by silverhopes at 10:18 AM, December 5th (Wednesday)]
Aut viam inveniam aut faciam.
DragnHeart ( member #32122) posted at 4:26 PM on Wednesday, December 5th, 2018
and would those same ways work now?
IMO no. I don't think the ways of the past can or do work now. The cost of living exceeds the wages so for most families both parents have to work.
That said I am a firm believer in that one parent should be home to raise the kids. My mother was home with us up until I was of age to care for my siblings home alone. She went to work because of a plant closure that left my father out of work for four years.
So again he was home. But the wages she made were less than what he had made so the issues were the same.
I am a Sahm and we have struggled greatly as all of you know. Now calculating childcare for four kids, an extra vehicle, insurance, gas, I would have to make well over minimum wage to work and have any benefit from it. We live in an area where work is scarce. The chances of finding work within my training or even outside of it that would exceed minimum wage is slim to none.
Some have said we should move into a city. Have public transportation etc. Well places are crowded. Housing is limited. Prices for housing is ridiculous. Right now we own our home with property. The kids can play outside.
I do know a few people who just have to have the latest tech thing that's out. Instead of saving money for a downpayment for a house they live with mom and dad and buy $900+ phone and a $200+ watch.
While i know it's really damn hard to get started after going to school and then coming into the work force with hundreds of thousands of dollars in debt unable to find work in the field you trained for, don't complain to me when you give up your Pris (car) for a 8 cylinder truck and have to pay $600/ month for it.
Me: BS 46 WH: 37 (BrokenHeart911)Four little dragons. Met 2006. Married 2008. Dday of LTPA with co worker October 19th 2010. Knew about EA with ow1 before that. Now up to PA #5. Serial fucking Cheater.
Zamboni ( member #65496) posted at 5:15 PM on Wednesday, December 5th, 2018
My STBXWH' s office is chock full of millennials and I was around them many times ... It's my understanding that a millennial is someone between the ages of 25 - 30ish.
Ditto to everything Tush said ... entitled, incredibly immature, selfish, self-absorbed ... diva-like behavior most days.
The ones at the office would make ridiculous demands ... complain about everything, hyper-sensitive, and easily offended ... eat organic and do yoga, yet smoke, drink excessively, and tan ...
Many of them still act like they are on Spring Break or still living in the frat house ... at 30. A lot of them need to grow up already.
Me: BW
Him: WH Serial Cheater / NPD
Multiple affairs
Almost Divorced
nscale56 ( member #60270) posted at 5:33 PM on Wednesday, December 5th, 2018
Because of the Man Bun and skinny jeans.
"If it ain't broke you're not tryin'"
The mans prayer--"I'm a man, but I can change, if I have to, I guess"
nscale56 ( member #60270) posted at 5:36 PM on Wednesday, December 5th, 2018
Oh and the hipster look. Cut down the beard people.
"If it ain't broke you're not tryin'"
The mans prayer--"I'm a man, but I can change, if I have to, I guess"
BeingNaive ( member #30652) posted at 5:43 PM on Wednesday, December 5th, 2018
I work in a field where I must interact with millennials on a daily basis and for me, here are a couple of things that bother me.
They are entitled and demanding. Their go-to is calling mommy/daddy because they heard the answer "no" or didn't like what they were told. Their need for a "safe place" and an emotional support animal is ridiculous.
Obviously, this is not for all millennials. Unfortunately, it does apply to a vast majority of them.
Zamboni ( member #65496) posted at 5:51 PM on Wednesday, December 5th, 2018
Don't forget the thick, black framed non-prescription glasses to accompany the skinny jeans, beard, and man bun.
Me: BW
Him: WH Serial Cheater / NPD
Multiple affairs
Almost Divorced
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