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ThisIsSoLonely ( Guide #64418) posted at 8:23 AM on Saturday, March 25th, 2023
I would say a 2 on a scale of 1 to 10. I wanted to "hurt" my WH as in "take him down" or "make him miserable'. Hurting the AP to the extent I could do it was just a. bonus. She made no commitment to me. She didn't lie to me on a daily basis for years. She was just - there.
You are the only person you are guaranteed to spend the rest of your life with. Act accordingly.
Constantly editing posts: usually due to sticky keys on my laptop or additional thoughts
LIYA13 ( member #62026) posted at 12:28 PM on Saturday, March 25th, 2023
It was a 11 for me but then I came face to face with her she was scared. The horror in her eyes and the continuous apologising made me see her for who she really was. A desperate lonely woman who really had nothing going for her in her life. She thought she could steal my happiness and Well she almost did. She wrote me an email on the day and again years later. Maybe she had some kind of epiphany.
My anger is definitely directed at my WH. He is the one that made the promises to me and we have a binding contract. It was a 11 on discovery day and since hes worked hard on R and our family for the last 6 years its come to a 4. Still angry but I have my days of ups and downs.
DebraVation ( member #51156) posted at 8:02 PM on Monday, March 27th, 2023
DDay1 - my anger and thoughts of revenge / violence were off the scale. I had dreams that were pretty disturbing. But now I am indifferent to her (8 years later) even when I see her which is most weeks. Though I would still laugh if some misfortune were to fall on her.
Day 2 this week - this one is apparently single. If she dare show up at my house I would drag her onto the railway line by the hair. I don't think I'm even joking. She can keep WH but she'd better not come anywhere near my home or my kids.
Dorothy123 (original poster member #53116) posted at 9:30 PM on Wednesday, March 29th, 2023
1st) I would like to say this thread has been on page one for 16 days now. Wow! Wow!
Not a lot of responses but on page one for 16 days.
2nd) I would to say that one of the reasons I started this thread because soon after Dday I began having very disturbing thoughts.
For years, I felt guilt for having such disturbing thoughts and I thought I was going crazy.
Again, I know the subject of violence is extremely triggering and sensitive subject.
I'm thankful that I did start this thread.
"I’ll get you my pretty, and your little dog too!" Wicked Witch of the West.
Summertime22 ( member #79796) posted at 10:32 PM on Thursday, March 30th, 2023
My anger was mostly directed at my cheating ex. We had so many plans for a family and home together. He snatched it away overnight while dropping the bomb of cheating on me.
I felt very angry towards her because he gave her what he had promised me. Now I almost, well actually I don’t, pity her. My emotions are mixed. But yes I am mostly angry. I hope she is suffering I like I did, I hope he is suffering too. I’m a spiritual person so those emotions don’t sit well with me. But it is what it is. I feel what I feel and I have acceptance about that. I no longer put pressure on myself to forgive. Hopefully in time I will. For me, not for them.
I’m a just over a year out and in a daily basis feel mostly on the road to recovery. But I dream about them both regularly, in my dreams I tell them what I think and call them out on what they did, how it devastated me. I get to say what I never did have the chance to say.
In hindsight I am grateful that I couldn’t find her on social media. That I stopped myself from knocking on the door of the house that we bought together that he moved her into a few weeks later.
They say that living a good life is the best revenge. I’m definitely getting there. But yes, if I’m honest I want them to be suffering. To feel that way is hard for me to accept as I have never felt that way before about anyone.
So glad to share my feelings here!
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