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Newest Member: Hurtingstrong

Just Found Out :
My Wife is Cheating and I'm Glad

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gr8ful ( member #58180) posted at 10:59 PM on Tuesday, July 20th, 2021

Maybe wear one of those biohazard bunny suits? lol

posts: 497   ·   registered: Apr. 6th, 2017
id 8677125
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Marz ( member #60895) posted at 11:05 PM on Tuesday, July 20th, 2021

No way I’d touch that now. Sloppy seconds wouldn’t appeal to me.

Plus you can’t trust her at all.

She could say rape, etc. If her AP infected her with an STD she could blame you, etc.

Keep that text !

[This message edited by Marz at 5:11 PM, July 20th (Tuesday)]

posts: 6791   ·   registered: Oct. 3rd, 2017
id 8677129
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Justsomeguy ( member #65583) posted at 11:15 PM on Tuesday, July 20th, 2021

My STBXWW tried that shit with me after I had filed. It's like they are working from a limited toolbox, and revert to whatever worked last time. I guess I do the same thing when I fish. I always start with the fly I used last time, hoping it will work. Never does though...

I'm an oulier in my positions.

Me:57 STBXWW:55 DD#1: false confession of EA Dec. 2016. False R for a year.DD#2: confessed to year long PA Dec. 2 2017 (was about to be outed)Called it off and filed. Denied having an affair in court papers.

Divorced

posts: 1875   ·   registered: Jul. 25th, 2018   ·   location: Canada
id 8677131
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Jameson1977 ( member #54177) posted at 11:29 PM on Tuesday, July 20th, 2021

Agreed, she is starting to realize shit is getting real and she’s throwing up a hail mary pass with 4 seconds left on the scoreboard, I mean no disrespect, but it is quite pathetic.

posts: 833   ·   registered: Jul. 16th, 2016
id 8677133
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SnowToArmPits ( member #50943) posted at 11:33 PM on Tuesday, July 20th, 2021

Tell her yes if she gets an STD test and shows you the results.

posts: 531   ·   registered: Dec. 25th, 2015   ·   location: Canada
id 8677134
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Justaguy61 ( member #75431) posted at 11:45 PM on Tuesday, July 20th, 2021

Could be reasons both biological "horny" to devious such as trying to capture some narrative such as "he claims one thing but wants sex so he is deceptive"...

IOW, other than simply getting laid, what is your upside and what is your downside?

posts: 51   ·   registered: Sep. 14th, 2020
id 8677135
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Thumos ( member #69668) posted at 11:56 PM on Tuesday, July 20th, 2021

I think there are a lot of downsides and very few upsides. Stay frosty.

"True character is revealed in the choices a human being makes under pressure. The greater the pressure, the deeper the revelation, the truer the choice to the character's essential nature."

BH: 50, WW: 49 Wed: Feb.'96 DDAY1: 12.20.16 DDAY2: 12.23.19

posts: 4598   ·   registered: Feb. 5th, 2019   ·   location: UNITED STATES
id 8677141
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clouds777 ( member #72442) posted at 12:00 AM on Wednesday, July 21st, 2021

Ugh definitely do not have sex with her. Wtf is she thinking. She wants to offer you sloppy seconds??? Uh, no thanks.

posts: 309   ·   registered: Jan. 1st, 2020
id 8677142
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Buffer ( member #71664) posted at 12:06 AM on Wednesday, July 21st, 2021

I am a ex sailor so from that perspective the one you knock back is the one you miss out on. Haha!

However; why the offer now? Has she been tested for STDS?

She may just feel sorry and wants to make you feel better. Can’t she just get you another pizza?

Really don’t go there!!

Buffer

posts: 1318   ·   registered: Sep. 24th, 2019   ·   location: Australia
id 8677144
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This0is0Fine ( member #72277) posted at 12:34 AM on Wednesday, July 21st, 2021

Sex will scramble your brain and emotions. She is counting on that. Jerk off twice, and see if the offer is still tempting.

A simple "no" is the correct answer.

Love is not a measure of capacity for pain you are willing to endure for your partner.

posts: 2841   ·   registered: Dec. 11th, 2019
id 8677149
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nekonamida ( member #42956) posted at 12:35 AM on Wednesday, July 21st, 2021

Sounds like there might be trouble in paradise between her and OM. He may no longer be available or willing to meet her needs so she's hoping you will stand in for him until the D is over. You're much better off letting her find another chump to take care of that for her.

posts: 5232   ·   registered: Mar. 31st, 2014   ·   location: United States
id 8677151
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guvensiz ( member #75858) posted at 12:42 AM on Wednesday, July 21st, 2021

You can't know what tricks she's been up to and you have no benefit in it other than having sex. Definitely not worth it.

posts: 637   ·   registered: Nov. 14th, 2020
id 8677152
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beb252 ( member #78948) posted at 1:12 AM on Wednesday, July 21st, 2021

I think it's all coming back to her now that's why she's trying to be 'friends' with you. Her life is going through drastic changes. She has a soon to be ex-husband who's been loyal to her but repeatedly cheated on multiple times. Maybe her affair is starting to fall off too, maybe words starting to spread in her company and questions are starting to arise.

She's got a child who barely talks to her and knows what she has done all those years. Moving out from her marital home after in which she stayed for a long time. Moving out of her religion which in part encourages that women who's into affairs are their husband's fault.

Her life is starting to fall apart and she's realizing that now.

posts: 404   ·   registered: Jun. 14th, 2021
id 8677156
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asc1226 ( member #75363) posted at 2:40 AM on Wednesday, July 21st, 2021

I know we are getting divorced and that your mind is made up, but we can have sex if you want, until I move out."

Why complicate a perfectly good divorce process?

I make edits, words is hard

posts: 633   ·   registered: Sep. 7th, 2020
id 8677162
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Jameson1977 ( member #54177) posted at 3:31 AM on Wednesday, July 21st, 2021

Take This0is0Fine‘s advice!! Amazing how much clearer your mind is after!

I think beb252 nailed what your WW is going through. A little sex on the side doesn’t seem worth it now. She did this once, you moved passed it, she likely felt that you would never leave. You have been decisive and fair through this whole mess, hold your head high and don’t stoop to her level.

posts: 833   ·   registered: Jul. 16th, 2016
id 8677169
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Stevesn ( member #58312) posted at 5:21 AM on Wednesday, July 21st, 2021

No thanks. That’s a full sentence.

After your D do what you want with whomever you want.

But I’d recommend not doing this until than.

fBBF. Just before proposing, broke it off after her 2nd confirmed PA in 2 yrs. 9 mo later I met the wonderful woman I have spent the next 30 years with.

posts: 3664   ·   registered: Apr. 17th, 2017
id 8677180
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BindassBP ( member #75283) posted at 8:31 AM on Wednesday, July 21st, 2021

There may be a list of reasons:

1. trying to absolve some of her guilt.

2. to prove others you are ending on good terms.

3. Steer you away from your current path (if she fears you will out the OM).

4. Sync with your current headspace.

5. NSA sex.

6. Trying to relive the past seeing you getting better with everything(looks, dress, life etc)

And none of them is going to do any good for you. So, stay away and keep yourself busy. Better yet, go for the cute receptionist.

[This message edited by BindassBP at 2:35 AM, July 21st (Wednesday)]

posts: 77   ·   registered: Aug. 29th, 2020
id 8677192
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beb252 ( member #78948) posted at 8:39 AM on Wednesday, July 21st, 2021

I'm also rooting for the cute receptionist... smile

posts: 404   ·   registered: Jun. 14th, 2021
id 8677193
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J0ck ( member #47763) posted at 9:10 AM on Wednesday, July 21st, 2021

everyone here agrees

DON'T DO IT

Whatever the reason it's still all about HER.

Full steam ahead, divorce - new life.

Don't make it complicated.

posts: 78   ·   registered: May. 4th, 2015   ·   location: United Kingdom
id 8677196
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Butforthegrace ( member #63264) posted at 11:59 AM on Wednesday, July 21st, 2021

The odd thing about your story is that I really do think your WW is polyamorous. She likes/enjoys sex with you, but she just doesn't want to be monogamous. My ex was/is like that. She's slept with tons of men since we separated. She also hinted about sex with me, but she was so prolific and unsafe that I said "no" mainly to avoid catching any cooties up in there. Plus I was getting plenty myself at the time, and then later I remarried and was committed to my new wife.

If you do it, don't do it until after the D is final, and then be sure to use protection.

Edited later: Ignore the above. I was confusing your thread with another thread. I do NOT think your WW is legitimately polyamorous. Rather, I think she's offering sex for nefarious purpose, to trap you into some logical corner or some such.

[This message edited by Butforthegrace at 11:08 AM, July 21st (Wednesday)]

"The wicked man flees when no one chases."

posts: 4180   ·   registered: Mar. 31st, 2018   ·   location: Midwest
id 8677205
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