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Newest Member: Hurtingstrong

Just Found Out :
My Wife is Cheating and I'm Glad

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KingofNothing ( member #71775) posted at 8:43 PM on Friday, July 16th, 2021

I have also been getting a lot of attention from women. There is a particularly cute receptionist who works for an architect I deal with who has overtly expressed interest in me. I may just see where that path leads.

To quote Jason Mamoa's Aquaman, "Muh MAN!!"

I'm happy for you, TWO. You've approached this whole journey with integrity and being grounded in a moral center that your wife was (is?) lacking. You deserve a little happiness. I'd hold off on the dating until the ink is dry on your settlement, because your STBX seems like the type to look for something to fuck with you over. You're the man on the ground and can make your own choices there.

Just a few here: How's your son doing? He was pretty broken up about everything. Any chance of there being a relationship there between his mom and him in the future? I know you have indicated you won't tell the OBS (other betrayed spouse). Do you know if she has found out yet? Does the AP and his wife go to the same church as you used to? I don't recall. From what you are saying on here it sounds like there some serious gossips in that congregation.

Rex Nihilo, the King of Nothing
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“If you’re going through hell, keep going. Just please stop screaming, it’s not good for morale.”
— Winston Churchill

BS 3 DDays/Attempted R, it failed. In a better place

posts: 799   ·   registered: Oct. 7th, 2019   ·   location: East Coast USA
id 8676220
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AnOminousMan ( member #79091) posted at 8:52 PM on Friday, July 16th, 2021

Glad to hear it. I pray that your journey to finding inner peace is a short one.

If you love me, you will keep my commandments. (John 14:15)
My story doesn't really matter. I had it way easier than most.
The only thing that matters is can you stare into the mirror and like what you see.

posts: 104   ·   registered: Jul. 8th, 2021
id 8676224
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balbichi ( new member #78736) posted at 9:07 PM on Friday, July 16th, 2021

Great Update. when is she moving out? Once divorce is done, go complete NC with her and her family. Total indifference hurts most. Also, I am sure there are plenty of betrayed wonderful divorced ladies out there. Find a mnice lady for yourself.

posts: 13   ·   registered: May. 2nd, 2021
id 8676231
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 TheWrongOne (original poster member #78753) posted at 9:17 PM on Friday, July 16th, 2021

Thank you all for asking about my son. He's doing fine and has accepted his mom and I are going our separate ways. He and I are tight. He says that he has been talking to his mom and that she has apologized profusely to him. I think they will mend fences. I honestly don't want him to hate her. They need to have a functional relationship.

I don't plan on exposing her affairs any more than I have done. No need to. I have what I want and I am content going forwards. I burned through my anger against her long, long ago. Even this latest affair really didn't make me angry. On the contrary it was quite liberating knowing I was soon going to be free. The only time I got mad was when we argued about the divorce settlement. But that too has been solved. Actually I am happy as a clam. Very content and looking forward to the rest of my life.

posts: 190   ·   registered: May. 6th, 2021
id 8676238
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 TheWrongOne (original poster member #78753) posted at 9:17 PM on Friday, July 16th, 2021

She wants to be in her own place by September. I hope it happens sooner.

posts: 190   ·   registered: May. 6th, 2021
id 8676239
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J0ck ( member #47763) posted at 10:29 PM on Friday, July 16th, 2021

mate thanks for the update.

so glad things are working out for you,

posts: 78   ·   registered: May. 4th, 2015   ·   location: United Kingdom
id 8676265
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Jameson1977 ( member #54177) posted at 10:42 PM on Friday, July 16th, 2021

So glad to hear you got what you were looking for in terms of the D settlement. Good for you, enjoy the freedom!!

posts: 833   ·   registered: Jul. 16th, 2016
id 8676269
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scaredwoman ( member #78680) posted at 10:49 PM on Friday, July 16th, 2021

So happy it all worked in your favor and that your son is doing well. I applaud your demeanor throughout the last few months and wish I'd had the same courage when I needed it most. Best of luck to you!

posts: 202   ·   registered: Apr. 20th, 2021
id 8676271
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jb3199 ( member #27673) posted at 11:44 PM on Friday, July 16th, 2021

I have what I want and I am content going forwards.

That's all that matters.

BH-50s
WW-50s
2 boys
Married over 30yrs.

All work and no play has just cost me my wife--Gary PuckettD-Day(s): EnoughAccepting that I can/may end this marriage 7/2/14

posts: 4362   ·   registered: Feb. 21st, 2010   ·   location: northeast
id 8676292
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beb252 ( member #78948) posted at 12:38 AM on Saturday, July 17th, 2021

Since you won't be receiving alimony, why not try to contact the OBS and send her all your evidences about their affair? Either way, you won't be impacted by it. So at least burn AP.

Just my 2 cents...

So excited about the receptionist though... hoping for a great news next time.

posts: 404   ·   registered: Jun. 14th, 2021
id 8676303
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Buffer ( member #71664) posted at 2:19 AM on Saturday, July 17th, 2021

Well hope that is acceptable to you.

Will you tell the OBS now?

Time to tell the employer as well, due to their activities. She may have let her lust for him cloud her ability to get the best contractor for the job. May have to also audit any contracts she sent his way due to sexual favours? All of her dealings have to be legally above board and needs to pass the pub test.

One day at a time.

[This message edited by Buffer at 12:29 AM, July 19th (Monday)]

Buffer

posts: 1318   ·   registered: Sep. 24th, 2019   ·   location: Australia
id 8676320
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J0ck ( member #47763) posted at 10:02 AM on Saturday, July 17th, 2021

Must admit the OBS does deserve to know the truth.

posts: 78   ·   registered: May. 4th, 2015   ·   location: United Kingdom
id 8676363
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Happenedtome2 ( member #68906) posted at 2:07 PM on Saturday, July 17th, 2021

Excellent update. I hope this continues as smoothly as you have handled it and hopefully your son keeps going the way he's going.

BH DDay August 2018 :https://www.survivinginfidelity.com/forums.asp?tid=633451

posts: 509   ·   registered: Nov. 23rd, 2018
id 8676376
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 TheWrongOne (original poster member #78753) posted at 10:01 PM on Monday, July 19th, 2021

beb252

Since you won't be receiving alimony, why not try to contact the OBS and send her all your evidences about their affair? Either way, you won't be impacted by it. So at least burn AP.

Just my 2 cents...

Not until that divorce decree is in my sweaty hands.

posts: 190   ·   registered: May. 6th, 2021
id 8676817
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BlueRaspberry ( member #76065) posted at 10:08 PM on Monday, July 19th, 2021

Not until that divorce decree is in my sweaty hands.

Totally agree. Keep your head down until the divorce is finalized, then blow up the affair between the AP and your wife. Both the AP and your wife should NOT be allowed to keep their betrayal, deceit and contempt for you hidden...

posts: 244   ·   registered: Dec. 29th, 2020
id 8676823
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beb252 ( member #78948) posted at 10:29 PM on Monday, July 19th, 2021

Not until that divorce decree is in my sweaty hands.

That is good to know.
All the best!

posts: 404   ·   registered: Jun. 14th, 2021
id 8676837
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J0ck ( member #47763) posted at 7:33 AM on Tuesday, July 20th, 2021

Fair point

posts: 78   ·   registered: May. 4th, 2015   ·   location: United Kingdom
id 8676940
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KingofNothing ( member #71775) posted at 7:38 AM on Tuesday, July 20th, 2021

Always, always wait for the ink to be dry on the divorce decree. Smart thinking, TWO.

Rex Nihilo, the King of Nothing
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“If you’re going through hell, keep going. Just please stop screaming, it’s not good for morale.”
— Winston Churchill

BS 3 DDays/Attempted R, it failed. In a better place

posts: 799   ·   registered: Oct. 7th, 2019   ·   location: East Coast USA
id 8676941
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 TheWrongOne (original poster member #78753) posted at 10:42 PM on Tuesday, July 20th, 2021

Okay, this just came out of nowhere: she sent me a text asking me if I wanted to have sex tonight. Like, what?

Why? I'm fixed, so I can't get her pregnant. Does she want to lure me back in? Does she have an STD and want to pass a me a bug? I have to say it is tempting. Even though our marriage has been a farce the last few years, the sex was, up until last year, plentiful and mutually satisfying. I know I shouldn't, but damn! Why would she do this? She followed that up with "I know we are getting divorced and that your mind is made up, but we can have sex if you want, until I move out."

posts: 190   ·   registered: May. 6th, 2021
id 8677120
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beb252 ( member #78948) posted at 10:53 PM on Tuesday, July 20th, 2021

It's a trap!

You never know who she's been with and you might catch up something.

posts: 404   ·   registered: Jun. 14th, 2021
id 8677124
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