SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

I don't know about the subpoena. Legal minds can advise.

FORENSIC ACCOUNTANT. Your lawyer probably knows one and can advise.

Thread is posting in Divorce/Separation now

Gosh, did anyone else feel like the cheating spouse is getting away with everything and you got screwed?

I really feel for you Von. When I first talked to my divorce attorney, I immediately felt it was completely ridiculous that my wife could cheat, get half, likely win majority custody, get alimony, get child support, etc.

Like, WTF even is that?

Vonbock it is normal for the attorneys to ask high and haggle down. Don't let the first offers freak you out.

OK thanks you all. My gosh she was asking for the moon with the petition. Hopefully my lawyers will haggle down.

Thisisfine - yea, that was what she was asking and more.

Tell your attorney you want to file on grounds of adultery. Let it get back to her. She how she reacts.

AND GET THAT FORENSIC ACCOUNTANT.

I remember she said I was a bad husband for 10 years. I am going to wonder if she is going to use it in court. 3 years into into we had kids. Now I am thinking, if I was such a bad husband for 10 years. Why did she stay with me? WHy didn't she divorce me 6 months into it. Why did she want to stay with me despite being a bad husband?

You earlier mentioned about her shady investments. If you are sure about it, hire a forensic accountant.

I am going to wait on my lawyer to see if they still need the forensic account. If my bulldog lawyer threatens her and and she gives me everything in settlement then I might not need the forensic accountant.

Wrong, you need the forensic accountant in your case b/c she was hiding marital assets thru her Optometry business. Additionally, those monies were probably spent, used to invest in properties when you said no. The only way you get that half of it is to hire a forensic accountant.

The other reason to hire a forensic accountant is so that you can have the shady stuff she was doing in your back pocket. When you have that information, you will have leverage in the negotiations. Listen, you keep saying how shady your wife is. Why would you not hire a forensic accountant if you know she is shady. It may cost you a few grand, but in the grand scheme of things, it will be well worth your money. Any sort of tax fraud or impropriety and I"m sure they will find some, you use that to your advantage. When your wife goes on the stand, she will have to answer to those shady dealings, and the Judge will view her as the liar, and you much more favorable. You are already going to owe her support, you don't want to over pay

If my bulldog lawyer threatens her and and she gives me everything in settlement then I might not need the forensic accountant.

In order to truly know what everything is, I'd use the forensic accountant no matter what. You might be surprised what's uncovered.

she just skipped the temprorary orders in front of judge and wants to go straight to mediation. Is that a sign of anything while working on settlement ?

She is probably trying to avoid you looking to much at what she is doing and has going on. I would still push for the forensic accountant to get involved. I would also put it upfront in her nothing will be really negotiated until there is full disclosure on the financial front.

Yes, she wants to go to mediation because she is hiding something. Listen, if you were being shady and hiding things, would you want to go thru a judge? By having to go thru the divorce process of detailed disclosures, you are putting her on the spot to say, is this all? If you hire a forensic accountant, she is going to shit her pants.

Vonblock, she is your enemy, and has been for some time. Why would you trust an enemy during mediation and negotiations. you know you already have to pay, your play is trying now to pay as little as the law allows, and if you can catch her being shady, the law will allow for even less.

Again what the accountant and the lawyer says. She has a plan and your best interests are NOT part of her plan.

One day at a time.

My lawyers say they will try to reach settlement before mediation. My lawyers know all the details.

[This message edited by Vonbock at 6:52 PM, September 16th (Wednesday)]

Here's why you want a forensic accountant:

1. Her sister is running a pills for money medical practice. She has to be careful because the Feds are really cracking down on this.

2. They are using your wife's clinic to launder some of the money.

3. Your wife has been taking that money and buying properties with it, either through her clinic, an LLC or personally.

4. They then rent those properties out to create a legal stream of income.

5. Here are her two main problems: First, her clinic which is now mostly dead, is raking in a shit ton of cash. There's no way she can explain this. An accountant will figure out this is all criminal pretty quickly and could report her. Second: Everything she has purchased, with her money, your money, her sisters money, is a marital asset, which means as her husband, you are entitled to your fair share.

6. Get an accountant. Get your fair share

Vonbock,

I think you can have your lawyer mention possibly getting a forensic accountant to your wife’s lawyer. If she is up to things she doesn’t want disclosed, this should be enough to get her to settle with what you are hoping to get. I think that’s what your lawyer is trying to tell you.

My understanding from my own situation is that forensic accountants are very expensive. My ex didn’t want his finances and business scrutinized, so the concern over a possible accounting audit was enough to get me a decent settlement and I didn’t have to go to court or pay additional lawyer and forensic accounting fees. I suspect that all your wife’s complaints about using lawyers is that she has a fear of exposure, so if you can use that fear without the extra expense, you’re coming out ahead.

[This message edited by Vonbock at 9:33 PM, March 11th (Thursday)]