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Postive New Beginning Stories!

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golden girl posted 7/23/2018 05:41 AM

I stayed with my H after his affair, but I have a new beginning. My H died after a long illness and I am living alone for the first time in my 83 year life. I'm lonely sometimes, but on the whole, I'm OK. The only time I miss my H is when I want to share some news---like a classmate's death or a new greatgrandchild on the way. Somedays he doesn't cross my mind.

sobbinginfla posted 8/23/2018 08:06 AM

It has been a long time since I have visited this site. I remember when I found this site and reading all the stories. The hurt and pain was at times unbearable. Fast forward to today. THE LIGHT AT THE END OF THE TUNNEL IS UNBELIEVABLY BRIGHT!

I just want to let all people know who are suffering and hurting right now, you will be fine. Is it easy, no. Will you live the same as you have for years, no. Financially, will you be in a pinch, yes. Will you come through, yes! It will all be fine, because for the first time in many years YOU will be in control of ALL aspects of your life. And it will feel absolutely AMAZING!!!!

So hang in there. Be tough. Work on you. Baby steps. You will be happier and healthier in the end. But you will be free from that particular stress. And you will ENJOY your life! Oh yes, I am not sobbing in Florida anymore!

FYI.....I was in court 9 days from my 40th wedding anniversary. And I was happy after 8 years of total bullshit to be in this court. Freedom is wonderful. Enjoy your lives! Much luv to all.

[This message edited by sobbinginfla at 8:09 AM, August 23rd (Thursday)]

Lb3putt posted 9/5/2018 23:33 PM

I have been married 54 years and my husband decides he wants a girly...heís 80...whaaaaat...yep 80. Iím 79 years young and now what I suppose to do....men do not want a 79 year old woman....but Iím not really old....no divorce is going to happen....he has a business and heís afraid I will half of it....I do t. Are about a divorce and I DO NOT WANT HIM BACK!!!!

Lovingmyselfmore posted 9/30/2018 00:48 AM

Another one:
https://www.survivinginfidelity.com/forums.asp?tid=628749

TrustGone posted 10/9/2018 12:49 PM

I just wanted to share my positive story for those who are still unsure and hurting. So here goes....


I met XWH#2 while in a divorce from XWH#1. I thought he was the sweetest man I had ever met. He called me Princess and treated me like one. I had never heard about love bombing, but that's exactly what it was. I thought we had a great marriage, we never fought, were OK financially, and told each other we loved each other daily. I was crushed when I found out about his LTA. We spent 3yrs in false R before I finally kicked him to the curb. I was sick with a failing liver through no fault of my own when the final DDay happened and he assaulted me. I had to sell my house/land after being there for 18yrs. We had built a house on my land and tied it all together. I was forced to sell it all and move into a tiny apartment due to my disability. XWH#2 was never there for me when I was sick due to my failing liver and lied to his family about why I was sick and what caused the failing liver.

Now for the positive new beginning story.... I was able to purchase some land and a house in another town after a year living in the apartment. Right before I moved, I met a man on OLD. He was nice, but not a love bomber. After dating for 2yrs, we got married. He has a wonderful job and was my rock during my recent liver transplant. He likes that I am now a SAHM to our two fur babies and doesn't want me to go back to work. This was what I always dreamed my life to be while married to two different WH's. I am now happy again and feel that I have been blessed after so much pain from my past.

It does get easier. You can find a new person who is authentic and loving if you look hard enough. You can be happy again. I am proof of "what doesn't kill you, will make you stronger". I hope that someday you can also find a new positive beginning. (((HUGS)))

99problems posted 7/25/2020 11:28 AM

I look forward to the day when I can post a real positive story. But I'll put a few positive things here.
1. I am allowed to have friends again. And after disappearing for 13 years I'm pleasantly surprised that I still have friends. They have given me support that I didn't believe I would receive. I am grateful and humbled by them.
2. I no longer have to live in a marriage with no sex. I'm not actually having sex, but I don't have to live with the person who shunned me and degraded me any more.
3. I don't have to live in a house with annoying, trite signs saying stupid shit like "love" and "home is where the heart is" anymore. I don't want to live in a bed bath and beyond.
4. I get to have a dog.
5. I'm not the "go get me my coke/booze/prescription/whatever I suddenly crave" slave anymore.
6. My laundry is clean, folded, and put away. Not thrown into a giant pile of clothes. I also don't have to live in a outfit hoarders den any more. The woman bought an outfit from the goodwill that she had donated!!! Not making this up. Every closet in the house was packed with her clothes.
6. I don't have to live her lies anymore. She lives a lie 24 hours a day. The most inane shit.
7. I never have to spend a perfectly good Saturday at the mother in law's house ever again.
8. Don't have to listen to her snore while I try to sleep. Don't have to worry if she's gonna fall down the stairs while she's blacked out nightly on Ambien and rum. Not my problem.
9. Don't have to listen to her whine about her life constantly, always a victim. Always.
I can't wait to add to this list. 😀

BoardPearl posted 9/11/2020 16:48 PM

This is an update:

I've been living with SO for a year, and life has been treating me well. All is good. We have been together for almost 10 years, but didn't move in together until last year.

11 years ago I was at my lowest point ever. But ever since then, life has become better and better. My sons are adults and are doing well. They suffered as teenagers through the divorce.

When life becomes difficult, you should see it as an opportunity to keep going strong! You are special and need to know this. It will get better.

[This message edited by BoardPearl at 4:53 PM, September 11th (Friday)]

Gemini71 posted 11/8/2020 10:22 AM

It's been 7 years since D-Day, 6 years since D was final. I finally feel like I've come out the other side. I love/hated XWH for a long time and resented his NW. But now, he finally just somebody that I used to know! If you're going through the pain of infidelity, you know how big that is.

I'm finally free. There is no SO in my life. I'm not looking for one, but I wouldn't object to an SO showing up. But for now I'm looking forward to being a crazy cat lady.

demolishedinside posted 12/30/2020 08:25 AM

It feels surreal to say that after all Iíve been through, I now feel joy. I know of at least three affairs, but Iím sure there were more. The last was after Iíd quit my job and moved states away. I had no job. No insurance. No way to support myself or my kids if I left him. I was destroyed. Then , things got worst. I wrecked my car. No job means I canít get another car. I felt trapped and literally wanted to die.

Somehow, I dig deep. I got angry. I did things I had to do to bring my kids home. I got a new job...and yes, I had to live with him for a year so I could save for the D.

Hereís the thing, I now am the happiest I remember being. I have peace. Iím in control of my life. My kids are adjusting. Iíve met a man who makes me smile and I trust him. Wow. Never ever thought Iíd say that. Life is good again and Iíd never go back.

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