Newest Member: girlangry89

Just Found Out :
Boundaries and Consequences 101 for all new BS

default

minusone ( Member #50175) posted at 11:38 AM on Thursday, May 26th, 2016

another bump

"I did then what I knew how to do. Now that I know better, I do better". Maya Angelou

posts: 8353   ·   registered: Nov. 2nd, 2015   ·   location: USA
id 7566208
default

minusone ( Member #50175) posted at 11:00 PM on Friday, June 3rd, 2016

bump

"I did then what I knew how to do. Now that I know better, I do better". Maya Angelou

posts: 8353   ·   registered: Nov. 2nd, 2015   ·   location: USA
id 7573463
default

Lyonesse ( Member #32943) posted at 2:33 AM on Wednesday, June 8th, 2016

bump

Me: BS, 40's.

posts: 1956   ·   registered: Jul. 29th, 2011   ·   location: West Coast
id 7576679
default

PinkFeelingBlue ( New Member #53091) posted at 4:15 AM on Wednesday, June 8th, 2016

I wish the ditching of friends who aren't friends of the marriage worked. WH's best friend has always hated me and is just now going through a divorce and living with a new girlfriend. He's in WH's ear all day, every day. There is no breaking those two up.Pretty sure he's been pushing WH on. If I understand the rules of this, it's up to WH to end the friendship. Not going to happen.

BS: 39 WH: 43
M: 17 together 21
D-day of EA: May 3, 2016
Heading for D or LS

posts: 35   ·   registered: May. 6th, 2016   ·   location: Henderson, NV
id 7576737
default

 lordhasaplan? (original poster Member #30079) posted at 4:58 AM on Wednesday, June 8th, 2016

Pink,

Tell him he can choose between the toxic friend or the marriage. If he chooses incorrectly, you know where his priorities are. Declare your value, if he balks you know he isn't willing to do what it takes to make the marriage a priority.

BS- Me (45)
D-day: 5/18/10, lies and TT till (11/26/10).
Currently in R.
Don't carry others crap. It's your job to fix yourself, not your spouse.

posts: 2104   ·   registered: Nov. 10th, 2010
id 7576763
default

sisoon ( Guide #31240) posted at 2:54 PM on Wednesday, June 15th, 2016

bump

fBH (me) - on d-day: 66, Married 43, together 45, same sex ap
DDay - 12/22/2010
Recover'd and R'ed
You don't have to like your boundaries. You just have to set and enforce them.

posts: 26010   ·   registered: Feb. 18th, 2011   ·   location: Illinois
id 7582695
default

minusone ( Member #50175) posted at 12:24 PM on Wednesday, June 22nd, 2016

bump

"I did then what I knew how to do. Now that I know better, I do better". Maya Angelou

posts: 8353   ·   registered: Nov. 2nd, 2015   ·   location: USA
id 7588369
default

Jpapageorge ( Member #31800) posted at 8:47 AM on Monday, July 4th, 2016

Bump.

"Either get busy livin' or get busy dyin'." (and I prefer to live)
"Shame on me for kissing you with my eyes closed."
Spectemur agendo.
Me: FBBF

posts: 2016   ·   registered: Apr. 8th, 2011   ·   location: California
id 7597930
default

mchercheur ( Member #37735) posted at 8:14 PM on Wednesday, July 6th, 2016

BUMP

Me: BW
Him: WH --Had 10 mo. EA/ PA with COW; Dday 5/2011
Married 31+ years/Together 32+ years/4 kids together
OW 20 years younger than us/divorced no kids
Trying to R; don't know what the final outcome will be

posts: 2685   ·   registered: Dec. 7th, 2012
id 7600363
default

minusone ( Member #50175) posted at 12:04 PM on Wednesday, July 13th, 2016

bump

"I did then what I knew how to do. Now that I know better, I do better". Maya Angelou

posts: 8353   ·   registered: Nov. 2nd, 2015   ·   location: USA
id 7606111
default

minusone ( Member #50175) posted at 10:07 PM on Monday, July 18th, 2016

bump

"I did then what I knew how to do. Now that I know better, I do better". Maya Angelou

posts: 8353   ·   registered: Nov. 2nd, 2015   ·   location: USA
id 7610694
default

minusone ( Member #50175) posted at 12:29 PM on Thursday, August 4th, 2016

bump

"I did then what I knew how to do. Now that I know better, I do better". Maya Angelou

posts: 8353   ·   registered: Nov. 2nd, 2015   ·   location: USA
id 7624793
default

minusone ( Member #50175) posted at 12:10 PM on Thursday, August 18th, 2016

Bump

"I did then what I knew how to do. Now that I know better, I do better". Maya Angelou

posts: 8353   ·   registered: Nov. 2nd, 2015   ·   location: USA
id 7637428
default

cantaccept ( Member #37451) posted at 1:23 AM on Monday, August 22nd, 2016

bump

"I'm still standing better than I ever did. Looking like a true survivor, feeling like a little kid" Elton John
I would now like to be known as Can!

dday October 21,2012
dday December 20, 2013
wh deleted
I attempted R, he was a lie

posts: 3505   ·   registered: Nov. 11th, 2012   ·   location: Connecticut
id 7640269
default

minusone ( Member #50175) posted at 12:37 PM on Thursday, September 8th, 2016

bump

"I did then what I knew how to do. Now that I know better, I do better". Maya Angelou

posts: 8353   ·   registered: Nov. 2nd, 2015   ·   location: USA
id 7655253
default

hard_yards ( Member #23549) posted at 12:37 PM on Sunday, September 11th, 2016

bump


I feel like I'm in a parallel universe... everything looks the same... but something's just not right...

posts: 1383   ·   registered: Apr. 8th, 2009
id 7657802
default

minusone ( Member #50175) posted at 2:39 AM on Thursday, September 22nd, 2016

Bump

"I did then what I knew how to do. Now that I know better, I do better". Maya Angelou

posts: 8353   ·   registered: Nov. 2nd, 2015   ·   location: USA
id 7667189
default

sisoon ( Guide #31240) posted at 4:50 PM on Wednesday, October 5th, 2016

bump

fBH (me) - on d-day: 66, Married 43, together 45, same sex ap
DDay - 12/22/2010
Recover'd and R'ed
You don't have to like your boundaries. You just have to set and enforce them.

posts: 26010   ·   registered: Feb. 18th, 2011   ·   location: Illinois
id 7678316
default

minusone ( Member #50175) posted at 2:00 AM on Wednesday, October 26th, 2016

bump

"I did then what I knew how to do. Now that I know better, I do better". Maya Angelou

posts: 8353   ·   registered: Nov. 2nd, 2015   ·   location: USA
id 7693367
default

heartbroken_kk ( Member #22722) posted at 2:53 AM on Thursday, December 1st, 2016

bumping. Boundaries are so important.

FBW then 46, XWHNPDPAFTG the destroyer of my entire life. D-Day 1 '99, D-Day 2,3,4,5,6... '09-'11, D '15. I fell apart. I put myself back together. Forgiveness isn't required. I'm happy and healthy now, and MY new life is good.

posts: 2540   ·   registered: Feb. 3rd, 2009   ·   location: California
id 7718416
Cookies on SurvivingInfidelity.com®

SurvivingInfidelity.com® uses cookies to enhance your visit to our website. This is a requirement for participants to login, post and use other features. Visitors may opt out, but the website will be less functional for you.

v.1.000.20210918 2002-2021 SurvivingInfidelity.com® All Rights Reserved. • Privacy Policy