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I don't see that GW is focusing on the OM, he has a WW that is still deep in the fog, so OM is still a factor in getting him out of infidelity. He has made sure that the OM will have consequences, but I don't see GW overly focused on him any longer.

GW

Have the friends and families received the A exposing letters you sent? Have you heard from any of them? Are you getting IRL support?

Don't dwell on posom.

Nevertheless, fuck his world up.

Not dwelling on him. He is just on the list

And the idea of NC with him now that the seeds have been planted is out fucking standing! Psychological warfare. The financials and other priorities are in the workflow and moving along, but nothing will happen immediately. Inn the interim radio silence towards both will prove to be golden as bombs start to fall. The letters that were mailed should be striking any day now so I'll get a BDA soon.

...."The 180 is my best friend, the 180 is my best friend"...repeat after me...

Even when she speaks to you the 180 keeps you detached:

"Gw, if you report soulmate OM I'll hate you forever"

"WW, Sorry you feel that way"

"Gw, the stress is affected me and OM"

"WW, sorry to hear that"

Conversations about the care and welfare of the kids? No 180 but still business like.

I'll get a BDA soon.

Love it! Yeah, "forward compartment is flooding", "we no longer have sonar", "we've lost all steering"...."We are up shit creek".

I salute you, commander.

Your enemy has indeed met his match.

Ok I'm a few years down the road from where you are, successfully divorced with physical custody of my two children. That, I feel, gives me the position to share my perspective with you in a manner a little more bluntly than I have previously. Actually three repetitions with 2x4 force.

You don't appear to have your eye on the right ball.

You are leaving your ass bare exposed in the breeze while you are indulging in the OM.

Again, the only reason why you are not getting fucked over right now in the things that actually matter, (i.e. your KIDS and your MONEY) is because your WW is more distracted and disorganized than you.

You've sent the nuclear warheads on their way. They will get there. Congratulations and well done . Now. Get your head out of your ass and protect yourself and your children. Seriously.

You want to know how to proceed? FILE!

He doesn't have his head in his ass.

The divorce, finances, custody--all have been teed up.

And, he's an attentive, loving dad whose priority is his kids.

In GW's.case, timing is everything.

Pulling the trigger in one area too soon might undermine his mission.

He's doing everything right for the moment.

Strategy is key.

[This message edited by MidnightRun at 7:54 PM, September 12th (Tuesday)]

Is the divorce legally in process? My understanding is "No."

Are they legally separated? My understanding is "No."

Can his increasingly unstable wife still take the kids out of state to visit the increasingly unstable POSOM? "Yes"

Can his wife still legally take out lines of credit, life insurance policies in GW's name? "Yes"

Can his wife still file DV against him with no legal history of divorce/separation that would give him a legal leg to stand on (i.e. her filing DV as retaliation)? "Yes"

Correct me if my understanding is incorrect.

If it is not, then my apologies.

If it is correct, then my words stand.

[This message edited by antlered at 8:04 PM, September 12th (Tuesday)]

Neither WW nor possom have a pot to piss in, or a window to throw it out.

Hell, she can't even afford a lawyer.

And, I can imagine the expression on Navy boy's face if WW showed up at his door with two kids in tow--that's if the kids were willing to go.

GW, stay the course.

[This message edited by MidnightRun at 8:36 PM, September 12th (Tuesday)]

However, I would nullify WW's attempt to collect on life insurance by informing her that authorities are well aware of the situation, and her ass would be sent up the river for life if anything would 'befall' him.

And, he can put a freeze on his credit reports--that's if his credit needs freezing after a c13.

My comments stand.

OP, my question is this: "In matters of vital importance to you, do you prepare for what is likely or for what is possible."

I'm not asking for you to give OM a pass. Far from it. You've checked that box and he is so very fucked My purpose is to make absolutely sure that your primary focus right now is on what will be important to you 5,10,50 years hence.

I'm guessing It will be your kids and your means to care for them, and not OM's career.

For me, three years out, OM is a turd kicked off my shoe. Not in the same universe as my concern for my kids..

GW, stay the course.

I have everything set to fill, in a specific order. The bankruptcy is priority 1 followed by the D. There is nothing at stake since I have nothing left after her little fiasco. The house is it and she's signed a quit claim. Other than that here's nothing. As of now I'm boarding up windows and readying sand bags for hurricane WW when the military moves on OM. I believe that will be the impetus for her to either exit the fog or exit my life. One or the other. Based on her earlier statements she will likely explode the minute she learns that the MOAB has hit OM square in the poo hole. How long that will last or the damage done is anybody's guess. I have to prepare for it now. Bankruptcy will be filed by the end of the month and the D lawyer has me set up to come in and finalize prep with him on the 25th. Mean while I'll set up IC for the kiddos to make sure they are ok and to help them thru the coming storm.

My credit is fried now as is . She couldn't get a burger at White Castle in credit.. as far as life insurance, anybody can get a policy on anybody at any time. Just watch late night tv. She will not make that type move because to her right now I'm life support. She won't do a DV because that would threaten my job and her life support. I'm saying this because I've already thought ahead of that and planned accordingly. She will jeopardize a paycheck. It would affect her in the long run as well. So monworry about that happening. She will be mad as hell and won't talk to me for a good while, but my personal professional and financial safety are secure as of now.

You're expecting her to be intelligent and self-preserving? Seriously?

The woman is on self-destruct and could easily try to blow your world up the rest of the way, with no thought for her consequences. She's already proven she's stupid enough to do that with expecting to live there while pining for sea-biscuit.

Thanks for your reply.

I was concerned that you weren't checking all the needed legal boxes and felt it was a disservice to you to be cheerleading OM related distractions while you and your kids were exposed.

From what you've said a lot of that is a moot point although your strategy still depends on her being rational. I'll still feel better once you've filed but will get off your case about it now.

Best of luck!

[This message edited by antlered at 10:42 PM, September 12th (Tuesday)]