Shino (original poster new member #86472) posted at 7:45 PM on Thursday, January 1st, 2026
Based on a Reddit post, I've been wondering for quite some time which is worse.
What if she cheats on me but receives money or gifts in return?
Emotionally, I feel that this is worse, but
rationally, I think it's worse if she spread her legs "for free."
What do you think?
I'll edit: What if she jeopardized your relationship for free.
[This message edited by Shino at 6:10 AM, Friday, January 2nd]
torso1500 ( new member #83345) posted at 10:18 PM on Thursday, January 1st, 2026
might depend if the exchange was considered a quid pro quo vs they had sex and AP gave gifts without explicit exchange
nomudnolotus ( member #59431) posted at 11:50 PM on Thursday, January 1st, 2026
I find this post very offensive and misogynistic.
A man can be a prostitute.
Receiving gifts does not make one a prostitute.
cocoplus5nuts ( member #45796) posted at 12:09 AM on Friday, January 2nd, 2026
Pretty sure this is a troll just trying to stir the pot. Can we report it?
Me(BW): 1970WH(caveman): 1970Married June, 2000DDay#1 June 8, 2014 EADDay#2 12/05/14 confessed to sex before polygraphStatus: just living my life
StillLivin ( member #40229) posted at 12:48 AM on Friday, January 2nd, 2026
WTH kind of incel 💩 is this? Seriously!
"Bitch please a good man can't be stolen." ROFLMAO - SBB: 7/2/2014
Bigger ( Attaché #8354) posted at 10:41 AM on Friday, January 2nd, 2026
Let’s give this new poster the benefit of doubt on the goals for his question. So far no guideline has been broken – but Shino – your question could have been answered in a non-gender biased format. That’s also how I’m going to answer it, because both genders can become sex-workers and couples can be of the same gender.
As a favor – go check the introduction page for this site and the guidelines.
Infidelity is not "simply" your partner having sex with someone else. It’s betrayal, the going behind the back, the stepping out of expected boundaries and rules to a union. Of course, we might have different "levels" of betrayal causing various levels of issues and pain. For example – your self-confessed drunk kissing of someone other than your wife... that IS infidelity, and your partner would be terribly pained to witness or know of it. But it might be "less" than waling in on you having sex with someone else or discovering an ongoing long-term affair.
How pained? Well... we have couples here that have reconciled from multiple affairs, long-term affairs and all that. We also have posters here who have separated/divorced over emotional affairs, ONS, and one because her husband patted a random woman’s behind. Pain can be relative, and each person’s borders are their own.
Being a sex-worker without your partners knowledge... that IS stepping out of the expected boundaries of a union. Just like being a secret assassin or paying for your lifestyle by embezzling your place of work. Career choice, place and type of work... these are all basic factors in what couples should be aware of.
If your spouse came to you and suggested they do sex-work for a couple of years so you two can reach your financial goals quicker... that would be a mutual decision. Just like deciding whether to join a sex-club or having an open marriage. Once the decision is mutual... it’s no longer infidelity per se.
Discovering your partner is secretly working as a sex-worker behind your back... well... I don’t see how that would hurt any less than discovering any other form of infidelity.
Answer your own question: When you were making out with that woman – were you jeopardizing YOUR relationship for free?
"If, therefore, any be unhappy, let him remember that he is unhappy by reason of himself alone." Epictetus
