My son will be going to the county jail due to a second DUI. For 45 days. Or 2 months. I’m not sure.
He has told me that he has repeatedly asked the mother to see his daughter and she has said no. I told him that was totally not right, and that she couldn’t really do that. That he had a right to see his daughter. He said she had blamed it on me, because I am sick. It’s true, I’ve been sick since a day or two after Christmas with sinus infections etc. Just yesterday I found out I have the flu. And so I have called the babies mother and ask them not to come over because I don’t want either one of them to be sick. But I explain to my son that he doesn’t have to see his daughter at my home where he lives. He can take her to a movie, or take her to a playground.
I explained to him that if that persists, he should get an attorney and go to court to set up specific legal parameters. He told me that she has a high dollar lawyer, and he told her that if my son retains a lawyer, he will loose all parental rights. Because of his record.
There may be things on his record that I do not know about, but I do know that these 45-60 days he spends in jail will be the longest he has ever been in jail. Other times he has been arrested for DUI, or driving without a license he has been in jail for two or three nights maybe.
I can’t believe that what he is telling me is actually true.
… She is being a butt and trying to scare him, or…
… he is being dramatic because he’s so mad at her.
Anyway I tried to let him know that no one with two DUIs is going to have his custody removed. He kept interrupting me and telling me that I always took her side. Then he told me that "this conversation is over.". When I said "OK" he continued the conversation so I just left the room. As I was leaving the room he was of course hollering about how I always took her side, etc.
I love her a lot, but I know that she is not always upfront. But I also know that my son exaggerates situations. Throughout this past summer and fall, he has been unemployed. And the baby and her mother have come over many times, sometimes three and four times a week, and stayed a good bit of the day. And because he stays up all night watching TV, he’s asleep in his room while she’s here. He doesn’t come out of his room to spend time with her…we’ll, not very often. So I’m thinking that a good part of this is him wanting to manipulate her to be with him. I just don’t know.
I didn’t know that he loves the baby a great deal. He’s really troubled now. This past late summer is when he and my other son got into a fistfight. Most of the time he is very docile and agreeable. He helps me around the house, etc. Talks all the time about how great he and his brother are getting along now. Helped me set up his room the other day and told me that he was going to introduce him to non-alcoholic "beer" so that maybe he would cut down on his drinking.
But also, he just is so down. And I am concerned about him going to jail for a couple of months in that frame of mind. When he is having mood issues, he is very quick tempered. And I know that that is just not an option in jail if he is wantng to stay out of trouble. I can’t stand the thought of him getting hurt.
I guess I’m mostly wanting to know if any of you know under what circumstances he could have his rights to see his daughter taken away from him.
[This message edited by WhatsRight at 12:35 AM, Thursday, February 9th]