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General :
Post infidelity stress disorder

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 Emotionalhell (original poster member #39902) posted at 3:06 PM on Sunday, November 20th, 2022

POST INFIDELITY STRES

I was lied to by my employer to get me hired and I feel all the emotions coming back just Ike dday. I’m surprised that a non infidelity situation is having this affect on me.
Has anyone else experienced this? I guess I am just very intolerant of any lie now. I do not trust my employer at all because of this. Like how do I work for an employer that lies amoug other little lies..to get ppl hired. Of course I’m not the only one that told that same lie in the interview.(told we would not have to travel, and I have had to travel many times, an hour away)

Me BS x2. 50Divorced WH #1Currently in limbo (with wayward #2)Dday #1 Oct. 2014Dday # 2 August 2018

posts: 1744   ·   registered: Jul. 22nd, 2013
id 8766060
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hurtbs ( member #10866) posted at 3:46 PM on Sunday, November 20th, 2022

I don't think it's the lying that is triggering you, I think it's the manipulation. Telling you what you want to hear to lure you in and then, once you're "trapped" (e.g. in a job with a salary you need), they pull the rug.

And yes, post infidelity I've had the same response to this type of behavior

Me - 40 something.
WXH DDay 2006, tried to R. Divorced 2012
WBF DDay #1 9/2022 #2 11/2022
Single

posts: 15711   ·   registered: Jun. 1st, 2006   ·   location: So Cal
id 8766061
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Tanner ( member #72235) posted at 1:33 AM on Monday, November 21st, 2022

Yes any lie post Dday triggers the hell out of me. We had former friends tell lies and it was awful. It was that kick in the gut feeling, that I wouldn’t have felt before Dday.

Dday Sept 7 2019 doing well in R
BH M 31 years

posts: 2007   ·   registered: Dec. 5th, 2019   ·   location: Texas DFW
id 8766113
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pureheartkit ( member #62345) posted at 3:43 AM on Tuesday, November 22nd, 2022

I'm more aware and looking out for lies now. I question more. Someone who deceives isn't watching out for you. I would use caution with such a person.

Thank you everyone for your wisdom and healing.

posts: 2507   ·   registered: Jan. 19th, 2018
id 8766237
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BearlyBreathing ( member #55075) posted at 5:01 AM on Tuesday, November 22nd, 2022

Yeah, I have zero tolerance for any bullsh*t these days. It’s like I was way too far over on the doormat side before, and now I have overcorrected. But I think it is my fight/flight system engaging immediately — it feels the anxiety start up and just self-escalates.

What does HR say?

Me: BS 55 (49 on d-day)Him: WH. 64. D-Day 8/15/2016 LTA. Kinda liking my new life :-)

**horrible typist, lots of edits to correct. :-/ **

posts: 5101   ·   registered: Sep. 10th, 2016   ·   location: Northern CA
id 8766244
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