SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

My H may be losing his job. He has worked for the same company for 37 years. He is being blamed for something he did not do and accused of lying. The whole thing is so unbelievably ridiculous.

He has been a great employee, A very hard worker and not a complainer. This company is notoriously difficult yet he has enjoyed working there, not been one of the complainers and gotten along well with everyone.

I am suspicious that they want to get rid of him because he has been hurt too many times and is older. None of the injuries were his fault and more times than not he would not say anything and push through. He lived on ice and advil. He was always able to do the job.

He was going to hopefully retire in three years.

We are both so stressed and upset. This is the only job he has had since college. I can't believe they are doing this to him after all those years. He also worked every single day during the pandemic (being high risk) while many others were able to work from home.

This has been going on since last week. Today might be the day.

I'm sorry I'm rambling.

We don't live in an area with many good job options. I haven't been able to work do to my health. On a positive note we have zero debt.

I'm scared, angry and I feel horrible for him. I can't imagine being questioned about something and then told you are lying. He has self reported multiple things and told them on more than one occasion that they paid him for hours that he did not work.

People can really suck!!

Zebra

I can understand the fear of losing a job.
However… my experience is that once a door is slammed behind you it tends to open something ahead of you.
You two have the great benefit of being debt-free… That gives you so much leeway. I don’t know what your husband works at or what education or interest he has, but try as you can to see this as an opportunity rather than something negative.
This close to retirement then maybe this only speeds up some inevitable decisions. Like can you two loosen some cash by downsizing? Could you get along with only one vehicle? Can you cut down the subscriptions you don’t use, the insurance you don’t need and so on?
Your husband has been working hard for all these years, spending a month or two simply looking around, evaluating his options…

I’m debt free and have been for some years. My wife and I were discussing the other day that if I were to quit my job (a high-stress, high-end IT consultation scenario) I could go into renovating RV’s or becoming a guide for fly-fishing or personal finance consulting. Chances are I would do all three, make comparable money and have a blast of a time.

I understand what you're saying Bigger and thank you!!!

We have been debt free for years. We have been living very frugally for a very long time so there isn't much extra to cut.

He is only 57 so healthcare is a real concern. No fun jobs for pocket cash.

He has not worked in his field of study and I'm not sure if that is an option at this point.

The job he has done all these years has not qualified him for any other type of work.

He really has worked very very hard putting in very long weeks. He was never home for dinner.

I have crippling anxiety and this is very challenging for me..

Sorry to keep posting. I am losing my mind.

They have not decided yet if they are going to fire him which is actually bad news. That means they have taken it to a higher level and are waiting for approval to fire him.

This has been going on for almost a week. He has to once again get ready and go to work and anticipate being escorted out of the building. For doing absolutely nothing wrong!!! If that doesn't happen then he has to work another day under this stress.

IF he get’s fired then consult with an attorney.

Our state is a right to work state (I think that's what you call it) so I believe an employee can be fired for no reason unless it is discrimination or whistle blowing.

We can't prove that his injuries are why they want him gone.

This is a huge company that everyone has heard of and they have very deep pockets.

We had to get an attorney 7 years ago when he got hurt and they denied the claim. It was a long stressful process. He wasn't asking for surgery or excessive time off. He just wanted to go back to work when healed. They backed out after putting us through months of no pay, expenses, losing a percent of his compensation to an attorney and tons of stress.

[This message edited by zebra25 at 2:31 PM, June 13th (Monday)]

Talk to someone at EEOC in your state. It almost sounds like age discrimination could be involved.

This company does positively horrible things to their employees.

You would not believe how petty this charge is. What he will be fired for is lying about it. But he told the truth. He knows they fire for lying and would have nothing to gain by doing that.

He would have been better off lying and accepting responsibility for something he did not do. He would not be fired for that.

He is obviously not a perfect person but he is a very hard worker who has always represented his company with a positive attitude and cared about his job. He still will not talk badly about the company.

My H has been let go from more jobs than I can count b/c the company decided not to Pay him his earned commissions. Hundreds of thousands of dollars have been lost. The older you get the harder it can be to find work too.

Get the company handbook. See if the company is following the procedures as to a termination. Does he need a write up or warning? Does the company have OSHA mandates?

He needs to be prepared to have a response to the termination (if that happens). The fact that there were injuries and he needed an attorney years ago shows that this company is not playing by the rules.

You need to outsmart them. If he can report the incident to a regulatory agency, he should. Like EEOC or state agencies or federal government etc.

Be prepared. Get your ducks in a row.

My H got 80% of his commission paid from his last company - just by threatening a lawsuit. And he would have won b/c there are 3 other lawsuits pending against the company for the same reason.

So sorry for you.

[This message edited by The1stWife at 1:14 AM, Tuesday, June 14th]

The company you describe doesn’t sound like a nice place to work. Life is too short for toxic employers.
One of the few quotes I remember from my business degree is something like "you start to work because of the company, you leave because of management".
Having been on this site for some time you probably know I can be direct: So far you have been rather passive about all suggestions – you have what to me sounds like a victim mentality… an inevitable sort-of "he will get fired anyways and there isn’t anything we can do about it" mentality…
Well… possibly true. If they have decided to fire him then maybe that’s inevitable. But you can follow the advice offered (talk to an attorney, get the company-policy manual, check OSHA, EEOC, is he in a union… It probably won’t change the end-result – your husband might still be just as fired. But it might impact his severance package and how he holds his head up when talking about them.

I'm sorry. My posting is all over the place. My emotions are all over the place. I am not being passive. I went on the EEOC website as Jeannie suggested. I did a Google search of lawsuits against this company, I researched firing laws in our state, I helped my H come up with examples of things he has done to show that he is honest, I helped him have an argument ready.

I have also been crying, angry, anxious and having trouble sleeping.

I sincerely apologize if I do not seem appreciative of suggestions. I am extremely appreciative, I am just very, very stressed.

I'm not sure what more I can do. They haven't fired him yet. Once he is fired there will be a hearing. He wants to leave on his own terms. He has given 35 years to this company. I don't see anything wrong with that.

Find a lawyer that only represents employees. Got a consultation now - they may be able to help you navigate the exit.

Sorry this is happening.

Thank you BB!!

Dumb question. What type of lawyer represents employees and do the work with union representatives? The union had an attorney for women's comp but I don't think they do for being discharged. I could be wrong about that.

Thank you 1stwife!! How did you survive multiple firings? This is so stressful!!! It wouldn't be as bad if I had a job and benefits. This company is HUGE. They know what they are doing and do nothing without legal backing them up. My H and the union will make sure they are doing things by the book.

[This message edited by zebra25 at 10:08 PM, June 13th (Monday)]

Zebra – you don’t need to apologize to anyone – least of all ME!

We get it your emotions are all over, and we get it that this forum can be a great place to vent.
We also get it that this forum can be a great tool to get options and even solutions. I guess most posters have the same attitude I do: you might grab someone by the shoulders and try to shake some sense into them, but then you just hold them close and support.

Zebra - please don’t apologize. I understand your position having been through two of these in the last 2 years.

One was Covid related and a large part of the company was basically let go.

This last one I was prepared for - we saw it coming for months. Luckily we have savings lol.

But being able to threaten a lawsuit for wrongful termination and other causes, my H got 80% of his bonus $ as a settlement not to sue.

The company fired no less than 6 others before my H for the same reason - don’t pay the owed commission. Plus other lawsuits are pending for the same issues. It was smarter for them to pay than add another lawsuit to their list.

Your H should consult an attorney. They may be able to prevent the termination.

From there your H needs an exit plan from this company. If he’s union he should have some nice retirement $ saved. He might also find another job that would be better for him - and get himself out if this toxic environment.

Z — I just googled in my area and found one whose website said she only represented the employees. I don’t recall any special name or title or anything. Since he is union, I would look for someone with union experience too, if possible.

Good luck — this sucks.

The general category is employment law. Attorney's in that class generally work with both sides of it. If he's a union member that helps because the union is supposed to work for the employees. Not always because the reps are human. There are also likely arbritation clauses in the contracts.

Thank you everyone!!!

It is most definitely happening tonight when he goes to work.

The union will appeal the discharge.

He is planning his exit either way.

There are so many things coming at us like a freight train.

Thanks for the advice and letting me vent.

He got fired.

The manager mentioned his multiple workers comp injuries. I do believe that is the real reason they are throwing him out like a used piece of trash.

He will speak to the union rep to see if he feels there is any way to prove it.

So we will have no income and no health insurance until we get things figured out.

That is grounds for wrongful termination.

His union rep needs to step up and address this.

If not, get an attorney.