As some of the few females who are part of this oh-so-exclusive exit A club, I feel like we've got to give each other some tips. Not sure if this would work for you, but it helped to have a few songs I could scream at the top of my lungs while I was driving.
I spend a significant amount of time in the car, and that was really hard on me because it left me with way too much time to think. The regular radio was too much of a trigger - not knowing what was going to come on, and all of a sudden I would break down in tears because of some love song, or the song we listened to on a vacation, or for our daughter's birthday, or even just something that reminded me of a meal we had one time.
Think things with angry or sassy lyrics, nothing sappy unless you need to cry it out. I know it can be hard to tap into our anger when we're so sad, but that's the beauty of the songs. It's much harder to cry when you're yelling angry lyrics, or getting really sassy, and if you just have a few songs you know will do the trick, you don't have to wait for the radio to put something on that's useful.
Here are a few of my favs for different moods... some moods are very specific haha.
Angry songs - these ones are for when you really need to yell:
You Oughta Know - Alanis Morissette
I Hate Everything About You - Three Days Grace
Still angry, but a little easier on the vocal cords, in case you've blown your voice out a bit too much with the other angrier ones:
Cry Me A River - Justin Timberlake
Fuck You - Eamon
Fuck You - Lily Allen (this one is obviously more sing-songy, but the lyrics are just too good)
Are You Happy Now? - Michelle Branch
Sassy songs - trust me, being abandoned like this does NOT make you feel sassy at all, but singing these can get you there if you really get into it
Truth Hurts - Lizzo
Good As Hell - Lizzo
Sorry Not Sorry - Demi Lovato
No Scrubs - TLC
Thank U Next - Ariana Grande (I really don't like her, but this song just works)
You Make Me Sick - Pink
Before He Cheats - Carrie Underwood
For when you need a good cry, but also something upbeat. The lyrics are so completely poignant to our situation, so you have to be sure you're ready for it:
Dancing On My Own - Robyn
For when you're kinda wistful, but just on the cusp of being in a good mood and need a lift:
Dogs Days - Florence and the Machine
For when you need an angry cry:
Rolling In The Deep - Adele
Foolish Games - Jewel
Damn, even just typing that was triggery as hell. XH and I used to send each other songs to listen to.
But anyway, hope that helps!