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Newest Member: Nbbb

Wayward Side :
Admitting it vs. Getting it vs. Owning it vs. Living it

Topic is Sleeping.
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Niceguy25 ( member #70801) posted at 3:56 PM on Tuesday, January 9th, 2024

I stayed with my WS to preserve a life for my children free from the hurt, shame and pain of divorce. I sealed my pride up inside, swallowed my self esteem and my masculinity while she carried on her PA the first year long distance, and then her EA for 3 more years. Blinders can cover the pain and eventually you just get numb. It took 27 years for her to finally come clean, admit to the affair, the sex, the plans for a future with him and all the deceit that goes with it. She finally acknowledged she allowed herself to be used and tossed aside. She finally felt the pain of her betrayal in our marriage. She finally realized she, In her words,"whored" herself for something false and only my commitment to this marriage and my vows kept it together. We are reconciled but it took many years and a second crisis for it to happen. She is remorseful, ridden with guilt and empathic to my journey, but still doesn’t want to talk about it. She did say to me, "it’s been 30 years, will you ever get over it?" To which I replied, "well, it’s been 35 years since our last of 5 miscarriages and to this day you talk about feeling cheated by only having 2 children. Will you ever get over it?" That question has never come up again. The pain does diminish, but it, the memories, the emotions experience are for ever imprinted upon our souls. Time does heal us but none of us who were betrayed ever get amnesia.

Her: WS, 35 at the time of the AMe: BS, 40 at the time if the A, 2 kids 7&9. Him: OM, 50, colonel in the AF, married, two grown kids, and a compulsive cheatNow, WS 65, Me 70, Him 79WS attempted to contact him and I found the card

posts: 280   ·   registered: May. 19th, 2019   ·   location: Midwest
id 8820730
Topic is Sleeping.
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