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'In case I don't see you . . . Good afternoon, good evening, and good night.' The Truman Show

For those of you who went through with divorce, what were those last moments that you had with your WS? Just before your divorce was final and immediately after? Was there a kiss, a hug, a wave, a moment that stays with you? Was it sad, happy, weird? If you could relive those moments, would you want to, would you change anything? Was that the last time you saw your WS?

[This message edited by icangetpastthis at 2:56 AM, Friday, March 28th]

I’m wondering this same thing,as I’m going through a divorce.We’re married 24 years and together for 37 years. I found out 2 years ago that my wife was cheating on me for 2 years and she blew up our lives and is now living with her boyfriend. I filed for divorce a year ago and she finally was forced to turn in her paperwork to start the process. I haven’t seen her in over a month ,she’s to ashamed to face me and look into my eyes and see what she’s done. I think about when it’s all over what will be the last thing she says to me,or will she say nothing at all. What ever happens I don’t think I will ever get closure.

Mine took the cowardly way out, and it was just fine by me because it avoided what you are talking about.

Ex was to move out the last weekend of the month.

I came home from work one day mid-month and all his stuff (and some of mine!) was gone. He had folks lined up to come do it while I was at work.

He never said a word about it (was doing ihs).

This was exactly in line with his character.

How did I feel? Relief and peace. Yes it was sad and I mourned the end of that chapter but I knew it was for the best.

I planned my out meticulously. We were IHS for a year he saw me packing, commented on how it hurt him and we were basically roommates until I left. I had my mom there the day I left in case he made things difficult. He told my mom that I was a difficult person to live with ha what a joke. We had a really weird stare right before I left. We both did have tears in our eyes, but there was nothing left. I had nothing to work with. He is a disordered person and I had to save myself.

While separated he harrassed me and lovebombed me. This pushed me even further down the road to D. I began to realize I loved being away from him. I loved the peace of mind. No more mind games or emotional abuse. I spent a year in a half working on myself then met my new partner. That's when xWS began stalking me and driving by my house threatening to confront my new partner. Said I was still his wife which technically on paper I was. That's when I decided to make it official and file for D. I no longer wanted to be HIS wife.

The last time I saw xWS was at my son's HS graduation but he didn't see me. We are no contact by my choice as he makes me feel uncomfortable and I really don't want to hear anymore manipulation, guilt trips or anything from him.

[This message edited by crazyblindsided at 4:27 PM, Friday, March 28th]

I'm in limbo and have no answers, but thought I'd pop in here to say I've wondered this too. Seeing this question hit me so hard, like a wall of unfathomable grief that I don't know if I'd survive it. The thought of those final moments feels like a death, but so very complicated because I don't HAVE to face. This is one of the reasons I stay in limbo, this thought alone.

For me, it was a nod and slight wave. I think I said have a nice life, but don't remember. Then I went to the car and cried when I knew he was gone. He had treated me so poorly for the last 10-15 years that the A stomped the last of the love out of my heart for him. Even though we each went to IC, he didn't change.

The last time I saw him was at H&R Block when we filed our last tax return together. Well, and I saw him from my window when he was walking over to go visit a relative.

No, I wouldn't change anything. There's no way I would want him to touch me, be it a kiss, a hug or a handshake.