Homewrecked2017, thank you for the wise advice. It is VERY much needed and I am forever grateful. I am so sorry your experience will be to my benefit.
I am planning to not give my son any choice in the manner as far as custody goes, I am planning on letting him think what he wants to right now, but will do everything legally to get full custody. My son has moved from the "I want to live with Dad"---TO---"I want to live with Mom & his sister/my daughter who will NOT go with my WH"---TO---I want 50% with the both of you. He's smart enough to know what his neutral statnce will placate my WH and ME--so he's okay as far as being in the middle of a tug-of-war.
I will do my part legally to give my WH as little time as possible with the WH. I will not tell my son that is the case. They already know about some of the crazy things he's done, they're aware. They know he's lied about everything.
I have 3 OW that I have phone numbers to, I have ONE address, they are all out of state. So, I don't know if the mere threat from my attorney to have at least one give an affidavid will be enough for the post-nuptial. I am sure they can have her served, request her to go to the local court and appear and give written testimony. I want to save her in particular the least amount of stress as she has been my biggest ally in helping me in the proof department.
I have pictures of him kissing a woman, nudes in the shower of himself, lots of screen shots from the OW. He used a social media app--so I am guessing there is some tool I can have them use to get some of that history. He literally had 7 different profiles
I am planning on requesting in discovery getting his last 4 years of credit card statements for the hotel, rental car reciepts--I am afraid that he could possibly try or has called the credit card company and claimed those all as fraud, even though I'm 99% positive they check ID's with a credit card in a hotel, I am postive there will be more from a later date that he hasn't claimed as fraud and tried to have removed.( I'm also hoping there is a time limit on claiming them as fraud).
My post-nuptual says STANDARD OF PROOF-"An admission from a paramoreor unfaithful spouse is not neccesary to prove that a spouse has been unfaithful. Proof may be in the form of texts, emails, electronic and internet, or results of a private investigator, recorded conversations or ANY such document provide by a third party--the parties agree that the court should apply a preponderance of the evidence standard, meaning whether it is more likely than not that a spouse has violated the Fidelity Clause. So fingers crossed I should have plenty in my possession. WH pays my attorney fees so I'm still positive he'll fight it.
You are right, I am going to lean heavily on using the police as if he gets in trouble he will lose his contractors license, business insurance and livlihood.
On a side note, the last OW told him he was pregnant and she has since blocked him and became my ally, he really has no idea if she is or not. I had thought about sending a baby gift to him in the mail and having it show up on or door..haha. She has said she will NOT tell him any different. I have played with the idea--but he does know where she lives and I would NEVER put her or her kids at risk.
I am HOPING that I can get him eradicated from the house until it's over but I have no idea how I am going to accomplish that?!? He keeps his work equipment at the house & livestock so I am sure he will want to have that.
My state is a "one party-consent" law so I'm guessing that means if I record anything between the two of us, as long as I consent then its good. I have an older recording where he threatened to push me out of the bed and swore at me---not sure how useful that could be.
I can't scroll back to see if I covered all your points--than you for the expertise.