Newest Member: Dazedandconfused1978

I Can Relate :
Betrayed Menz Thread - Part 34

default

Notthevictem ( member #44389) posted at 9:24 PM on Tuesday, September 29th, 2020

Been better, but haven't we all?

BH: Me 37
WW: Her 41
DDAY Mar 2014

posts: 13361   ·   registered: Aug. 5th, 2014   ·   location: Florida
id 8592607
default

LosferWords ( member #30369) posted at 7:11 PM on Wednesday, September 30th, 2020

Unexpected turn of events. My attorney and paralegal were trying to get an earlier court date for me. They emailed me last night. I guess the judge signed off and rubber stamped everything. I am officially divorced, as of yesterday, on my 20th anniversary.

posts: 31092   ·   registered: Dec. 11th, 2010
id 8593043
default

sisoon ( Guide #31240) posted at 7:56 PM on Wednesday, September 30th, 2020

How are you feeling? Are you ready for 'congratulations'?

I ask because I'm projecting: D being final on the 20th anniversary would be bittersweet for me.

I'm glad it didn't drag on. Once you know what you want, the quicker you get it, the better.

fBH (me) - on d-day: 66, Married 43, together 45, same sex ap
DDay - 12/22/2010
Recover'd and R'ed
You don't have to like your boundaries. You just have to set and enforce them.

posts: 26161   ·   registered: Feb. 18th, 2011   ·   location: Illinois
id 8593068
default

LosferWords ( member #30369) posted at 8:01 PM on Wednesday, September 30th, 2020

Thanks, sisoon. The fact that I moved out almost three years ago, and my d-days being almost 10 years ago means this has dragged on for a bit.

I will take congratulations in the context of moving forward. I do have mixed feelings, as I will always feel some form of love for her. I mean... I didn't marry her because I wanted to divorce her, right? And yes. A bittersweet moment for sure.

Looking forward to moving on and forging the rest of my life as a single guy. Going to be interesting!

posts: 31092   ·   registered: Dec. 11th, 2010
id 8593071
default

steadychevy ( member #42608) posted at 2:28 AM on Thursday, October 1st, 2020

Congratulations, Losfer, and I'm sorry. I understand what you're saying. Not something to celebrate really but new reality. I never wanted to be divorced but it was the only solution for me. Onward and upward from here.

BH(me)70; XWW 64; M 42 yrs
DDay1-01/09/13;DDay2-26/10/13;DDay3-19/12/13;DDay4-21/01/14
LTA-09/02-06/06? OM - COW
"dates" w/3 lovers post engagement;ONS w/stranger post commitment, lies, lies, lies
Separated 23/09/2017; D 16/03/2020

posts: 4679   ·   registered: Feb. 27th, 2014   ·   location: Canada
id 8593237
default

LosferWords ( member #30369) posted at 4:12 AM on Thursday, October 1st, 2020

Thanks, Steady. I do need to find some way to celebrate. Not out of vindication, but because I can move on. I'm glad you get it, and I appreciate your congrats. Thank you! Onward and upward for sure!

posts: 31092   ·   registered: Dec. 11th, 2010
id 8593272
default

william ( member #41986) posted at 5:30 AM on Friday, October 2nd, 2020

hi all,

back again after a break from the site. just needed time to get my mind straight, recover, and figure out a path forward.

me - bh
her - lara01

from 09/11 - 05/13
2 ONS, 10 sexting partners, 1 LT EA/PA

??/06/13 DD/1 - admits to LT EA, begin false R.
01/13/14 DD/2 - LTA was PA.
01/18/14 DD/3 - sexting 5 guys.
01/19/14 DD/4 - 2 ONS with different guys

posts: 2162   ·   registered: Jan. 9th, 2014
id 8593632
default

Notthevictem ( member #44389) posted at 6:27 AM on Friday, October 2nd, 2020

well, good thing covid is keeping everybody in doors, cause i don't think the single women in your state are properly prepared for a single losfer.

Shit is about to get real.

BH: Me 37
WW: Her 41
DDAY Mar 2014

posts: 13361   ·   registered: Aug. 5th, 2014   ·   location: Florida
id 8593642
default

Notthevictem ( member #44389) posted at 6:28 AM on Friday, October 2nd, 2020

got a path forward william?

BH: Me 37
WW: Her 41
DDAY Mar 2014

posts: 13361   ·   registered: Aug. 5th, 2014   ·   location: Florida
id 8593643
default

william ( member #41986) posted at 3:28 AM on Saturday, October 3rd, 2020

yeah I realized I wouldn't ever trust her again, I detached and did the 180, and had the divorce finalised in mid August.

whatever path I'm on I'm on it without her. it feels weird in some ways but is also a massive load off of me. I feel younger, I'm sleeping better, I'm eating healthier and better, and I'm happier.

me - bh
her - lara01

from 09/11 - 05/13
2 ONS, 10 sexting partners, 1 LT EA/PA

??/06/13 DD/1 - admits to LT EA, begin false R.
01/13/14 DD/2 - LTA was PA.
01/18/14 DD/3 - sexting 5 guys.
01/19/14 DD/4 - 2 ONS with different guys

posts: 2162   ·   registered: Jan. 9th, 2014
id 8594064
default

Incarnate ( member #46085) posted at 4:54 PM on Saturday, October 3rd, 2020

I could have sworn I typed up a reply here, but now I'm late getting up for work so I'm rushing my morning. I'll check in later, y'all. Hope you're all doing well.

Me: BH
She: EW
Divorce in progress
DD1: 11/29/14
DD2: 8/14/19

What a wicked game we play.

posts: 768   ·   registered: Dec. 26th, 2014   ·   location: Northern California
id 8594193
default

LosferWords ( member #30369) posted at 11:33 PM on Saturday, October 3rd, 2020

Good to see you, william. Looks like you are about a month ahead of me. Glad to see some weight has lifted off your shoulders!

posts: 31092   ·   registered: Dec. 11th, 2010
id 8594280
default

LosferWords ( member #30369) posted at 11:36 PM on Saturday, October 3rd, 2020

well, good thing covid is keeping everybody in doors, cause i don't think the single women in your state are properly prepared for a single losfer.

Slow down there, NTV!

My first weekend as a single man has so far consisted of a bucket of KFC, some beer, and my TV. Not moving too far from my recliner this weekend.

posts: 31092   ·   registered: Dec. 11th, 2010
id 8594281
default

william ( member #41986) posted at 3:54 AM on Sunday, October 4th, 2020

thanks.

nice to see you too.

just needed a break to get my mind sorted out and catch my breath. this site can get grim dark sometimes...

what do you have planned AFTER the divorce loafer? not like long term plans but going to go out and do anything just for yourself? take a hike, get that 'whatever', sleep in?

[This message edited by william at 10:14 PM, October 3rd (Saturday)]

me - bh
her - lara01

from 09/11 - 05/13
2 ONS, 10 sexting partners, 1 LT EA/PA

??/06/13 DD/1 - admits to LT EA, begin false R.
01/13/14 DD/2 - LTA was PA.
01/18/14 DD/3 - sexting 5 guys.
01/19/14 DD/4 - 2 ONS with different guys

posts: 2162   ·   registered: Jan. 9th, 2014
id 8594322
default

steadychevy ( member #42608) posted at 10:16 PM on Sunday, October 4th, 2020

It's been a while since you've been here, William. Nice to see you again. I wondered what had happened. I see now. Sorry about the outcome. My divorce was final in April. I wondered if this wouldn't be the result with you. Welcome back.

BH(me)70; XWW 64; M 42 yrs
DDay1-01/09/13;DDay2-26/10/13;DDay3-19/12/13;DDay4-21/01/14
LTA-09/02-06/06? OM - COW
"dates" w/3 lovers post engagement;ONS w/stranger post commitment, lies, lies, lies
Separated 23/09/2017; D 16/03/2020

posts: 4679   ·   registered: Feb. 27th, 2014   ·   location: Canada
id 8594454
default

Tred ( member #34086) posted at 12:24 AM on Monday, October 5th, 2020

My first weekend as a single man has so far consisted of a bucket of KFC, some beer, and my TV.

Los, I'm certain that checks a box for a lot of women somewhere. If your dating profile was just that you'd weed out a lot of riff raff that just ain't ready for that high life.

Married: 24 years (14 @JFO)
D-Day: 11/09/11
"Ohhhhh...shut up Tred!" - NOT the official SI motto (DS)

posts: 5788   ·   registered: Dec. 2nd, 2011
id 8594477
default

Unhinged ( member #47977) posted at 1:50 PM on Monday, October 5th, 2020

Losfer, whether your D calls for congratulations or commiserations, I'm wishing you the best, brother.

Heading towards divorce
D-Day April, 2015

"The Universe is not short on wake-up calls. We're just quick to hit the snooze button."
-Brene Brown

posts: 6362   ·   registered: May. 21st, 2015   ·   location: Colorado
id 8594562
default

LosferWords ( member #30369) posted at 8:22 PM on Monday, October 5th, 2020

Los, I'm certain that checks a box for a lot of women somewhere. If your dating profile was just that you'd weed out a lot of riff raff that just ain't ready for that high life.

Do you think if I were wearing coveralls that would round out the package? Going for high class here. Appreciate the advice, kind sir.

posts: 31092   ·   registered: Dec. 11th, 2010
id 8594685
default

LosferWords ( member #30369) posted at 8:24 PM on Monday, October 5th, 2020

Losfer, whether your D calls for congratulations or commiserations, I'm wishing you the best, brother.

I will take both, Hinged! Thank you. I appreciate the kind words. Gonna be alright. Gonna be more than alright!

posts: 31092   ·   registered: Dec. 11th, 2010
id 8594688
default

sisoon ( Guide #31240) posted at 4:26 PM on Tuesday, October 6th, 2020

I'll add my late congratulations and commiseration.

No honest person gets M to get D'ed, but when D is right, it gives you freedom and starts a new adventure, IMO. That's pretty good, also IMO.

Still, change is a PITA....

fBH (me) - on d-day: 66, Married 43, together 45, same sex ap
DDay - 12/22/2010
Recover'd and R'ed
You don't have to like your boundaries. You just have to set and enforce them.

posts: 26161   ·   registered: Feb. 18th, 2011   ·   location: Illinois
id 8594859
Cookies on SurvivingInfidelity.com®

SurvivingInfidelity.com® uses cookies to enhance your visit to our website. This is a requirement for participants to login, post and use other features. Visitors may opt out, but the website will be less functional for you.

v.1.000.20211022 2002-2021 SurvivingInfidelity.com® All Rights Reserved. • Privacy Policy