SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

Hi Chili, just checking in to see how you're doing.

skeeter, crazyblindsided, BB, WTB, LRose and Karmafan: Thank you all for your support in this. Sometimes it's just sucky to do something resembling "the right or kind thing." I have IC and friends as I've worked through this, but sitting alone ruminating, you sometimes start to second-guess or overthink things. (Bet that isn't at allll familiar to anyone around here).

newlife03: I'm doing pretty ok. Licking my wounds a little bit having sent those letters into the unknown. At the same time, excited to get going on my nnb in a "real world" way - unfortunately it seems the world isn't quite ready for all that just yet.

Glad to hear it, one day at a time right?

Minor hiccup that all of us D/S types can relate to...

...an anticipated moment has arrived and it makes me sad (and maybe more angry actually). Something XSO and I were looking forward to - had daydreamed about and planned to enjoy together in years to come. Sigh.

Ending a relationship and re-writing the future in pandemic times is extra challenging. Celebrating "now" moments is hard too.

Bitch bitch whine whine...

Big hugs, chili

So sorry you are struggling Chili.....I take it you haven’t heard back from XSO and children?

But you have been there before and know the score. You get spells of feeling fine, and even flickers of excitement about the future, and then the tiniest of triggers...makes the house of cards go down. But you also know that you do get back up again, and each time you feel that little steadier on your feet.

I know it’s hard with the pandemic, but as you said yourself, sometimes a leap of faith is all that is available to us. That and taking stock of what’s already there and matters. Fortifying our foundations so that, when the times comes, we can start building anew.

You’ll be fine Chili (( ))

[This message edited by Karmafan at 1:04 PM, February 16th (Tuesday)]

(((((Chili))))) You talk it through as much as you need to. If you start overthinking, PLEASE share your overthinking here so we can help you.

I mean this with utmost sincerity: that man is an idiot. He didn’t even fight for one of the most amazing women he will ever know? Damn, he’s either stubborn, stupid, selfish, or all three - but whatever the case, NOT your responsibility. You asked for what you needed, and he pretty much said to suck it up? That’s not loving at all. What a loser.

One thing I love about you, Chili, is how bone-deep your awesomeness is. I’ve never known a time when I didn’t admire you. So his departure, while undoubtedly painful, will not remove even an ounce of your awesomeness. He doesn’t have that kind of power. No one can take that from you, Chili. ((((Hugs))))

Jana, Karmafan, silver: thank you guys so much for the hugs - they were well received for sure.

Karmafan: Nope - haven't heard a thing. Didn't really expect to though. IC predicts one or more of the kids will reach out in the next year or so as they get older. But I'm not looking for it. I feel like I crossed a big healing hurdle sending those letters though.

silver: you are a sweet spirit. It's funny - we always talk about the roller coaster around here, but I've been imagining healing and new beginnings more like a circular spiral tower - but one that moves upwards. It's a slow spin on some of those circles, but then we make it up to the next ring. Ain't nothing linear.

If you start overthinking

Me? Overthink? Ha! I can take a thing and tear it down to its ittiest bittiest pieces, pick up each one with tweezers, hold it up to the light, flip it over and check the backside...

Thinking of you, Chili. February is a tough month for us single gals. Treat yourself to something special, even if it's just a simple thing like a pedicure. I did that on Valentine's day. Love ourselves. (((Chili)))