SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

Your posts remind me of a person I know (not the AP). It's a lesser degree I guess b/c this person doesn't sleep with other people's husbands but she is pretty self centered. Not mean, but so focused on herself and largely oblivious to other people. She's super charming as well and I guess that's why she gets away with some selfish behavior.

She cannot stand to be called out on ANYTHING. If you do, she may eventually concede some minor point but she will come back, over and over if she has to, to get you to change your mind and admit she is awesome. In other words, her apology means "we will discuss this again until you take it back."

If she thinks you are angry with her, she will get pushy to the point of intrusive with texts and calls. And if you tell her why you're upset, well back to point one: she'll spend forever trying to convince you are wrong.

Reading about your Tri-whore sounds similar. She literally cannot handle being seen as anything less than perfect. She is pushing your boundaries until you concede that she is cool. At a minimum, when she pushes and you don't reaffirm the boundary, she considers it a victory. I don't think she will stop tho until you treat her as a friend and confirm her belief that she is awesome.

I hate her on your behalf.

I’d make a comment to her current BF.

That would be the last time she would sit near me.

Or come within a mile if me lol

[This message edited by The1stWife at 6:04 PM, Friday, June 17th]

Wow the best thing for her is for it not to bother you. Come here and vent but hold your head high, you are not in competition with her, she is nothing, she is trying to compete with you and you don’t even notice.

We have a young neighbor that had a GF living with him. He caught her cheating and told her to leave, she freaked out on him and busted the windows out of his truck. She then made a DV report with police and he agreed not to press charges if she would just leave him alone. She then got a NC order on him and has been driving by several times a week. She even came to the community pool with new guy, she has the code. She was kicked out and asked not to return.

The girl cannot stand it that she no longer consumes head space in our friend. She is dragging this new guy around with probably no idea what she’s up to.

Did you mean to say that you actually competed in a world championship? Wow.

If that goes to far in threatening your anonymity, please ignore the question, but ... competing in a world championship? Wow.

Yes on the World Championship….but mostly because I’m a middle aged woman. And, most woman my age are smart enough not to do this…lol. She HAD been my mentor. Every time I go a little faster than her, and she’s 15 yrs younger, I get a feeling of glee…:but I’m petty that way.

Woke up this morning fantasizing about telling the BF if they do it again….and just asking her what her f-ing problem might be.

Thanks for the support guys.

“Fareast......I actually received an emailed apology 9-10 months post DDay from her where she said roughly that....but wanted to be sure that I knew that H started it....and that she should have been the bigger person and not succumbed to his advances. Utter Bull$hit!”

Yes, you are absolutely correct, it is utter bullshit in my view. I hate to shatter your WH’s self image, and he is still responsible for his terrible decisions, but the OW did not pursue him, she pursued his “type”. There was nothing special about him, except he is a triathlete, and that was all she cared about. Think about it. Look at her pattern. She pursues triathletes. Triathletes fit her profile of someone worthy of pursuing. She considers herself to be this amazing high achiever, successful physician, and hard charging competitive athlete. She can’t settle for any good, faithful partner. The only persons she deems worthy of pursuing are similarly focused individuals competing in a very demanding endurance sport. If they happen to be married, well she would never let that stand in the way of pursuing what SHE wants! Totally self absorbed and entitled.

You mentioned she had a recent surgery. Let me guess: she obsesses about her training and pushes the boundaries her body can stand, and suffers overuse injuries as a result. Her body will self destruct eventually. I know the type. I was a serious long distance runner my whole life. Good luck. You are doing fine.

She considers herself to be this amazing high achiever, successful physician, and hard charging competitive athlete. She can’t settle for any good, faithful partner. The only persons she deems worthy of pursuing are similarly focused individuals competing in a very demanding endurance sport. If they happen to be married, well she would never let that stand in the way of pursuing what SHE wants! Totally self absorbed and entitled.

Fareast.......You've pegged her. OBS shared with me the evidence he had gathered in the form of notes she wrote my FWH.....where she basically details this and complains about her husband.

In a weird twist of fate......I've just tested positive for covid. Moral dilemma.......do I tell them? I mean, she's in medicine.....she probably gets exposed on the daily at work. Maybe karma??

Maybe she exposed you and not the other way around?

Naw.....I think I know when/how/who I was exposed. Several people I know came down with it after some local events last weekend.

Well, I hope you get better quickly in any event. I had omicron back in January, and while highly unpleasant, it didn't get down into my lungs so I exceedingly thankful for that. Hopefully, yours will be a mild case.