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crazyblindsided (original poster member #35215) posted at 5:41 PM on Tuesday, October 20th, 2020
Omg this guy infuriates me 
My son is struggling in school and I asked STBX to talk with my son about it since he has the kids this week. Instead he starts blaming me for his relationship with our son stating that he has no respect for him and won't talk to his dad. I simply told him that he needs to foster his relationship with him that he is his dad.
STBX goes on to say that it's happened since "All this went down" meaning since the separation. Narcs are a special kind of stoopid.
fBS/fWS(me):52 Mad-hattered after DD (2008)
XWS:55 Serial Cheater, Diagnosed NPD
DD(22) DS(19)
XWS cheated the entire M spanning 19 years
Discovered D-Days 2006,2008,2012, False R 2014
Separated 9/2019; Divorced 8/2024
twicefooled ( member #42976) posted at 6:05 PM on Tuesday, October 20th, 2020
Yep.
My exh is mostly absent from the kiddos life (due to his choices, nothing to do with us. He's always had "liberal visitation" where he can pretty much see them whenever he feels like it).
The kiddos don't want to see him much since he's never made them a priority. And now it's totally my fault that all this has happened.
What-the-fuck-ever dude. It's NEVER their fault. Ever.
May 29 2021 ***reclaimed myself and decided to delete my story with my ex because I'm now 7 years free from him and mentally healthier than I've been in years.
*********When you know better, you can do better*************
Poppy704 ( member #62532) posted at 6:08 PM on Tuesday, October 20th, 2020
I have learned that it is best to communicate directly with my teenager about school work, rather than trying to get my Ex to convey information, and that’s also what the law firm I work for recommends. I prefer sending a text to my son, so it’s in writing for us both to refer back to, and then following up with a phone call. Co-parenting of course would be ideal because parents SHOULD be a united front in regards to academics but in the case of contentious divorces, the less communication with the ex, the better.
crazyblindsided (original poster member #35215) posted at 6:18 PM on Tuesday, October 20th, 2020
I have learned that it is best to communicate directly with my teenager about school work
I agree and I usually do this, but my son's iphone is broken and my STBX has him this week. Wanted to make sure it was addressed, but yeah agree the less communication the better. That is what works for me.
fBS/fWS(me):52 Mad-hattered after DD (2008)
XWS:55 Serial Cheater, Diagnosed NPD
DD(22) DS(19)
XWS cheated the entire M spanning 19 years
Discovered D-Days 2006,2008,2012, False R 2014
Separated 9/2019; Divorced 8/2024
Anna123 ( member #70908) posted at 10:40 PM on Tuesday, October 20th, 2020
STBX goes on to say that it's happened since "All this went down"
What an ass. Geeze-- things just "went down". He is a little boy that never grew up. Poor baby - you are such a meany. All he did was lie a lot and cheat and cause a divorce, come on! :-)
Adlham ( member #53358) posted at 6:00 AM on Wednesday, October 21st, 2020
I can totally relate.
My ex never bothered to foster a relationship with my daughter. In 20 years time, he saw her twice- his sister's wedding & her 7yo cousin's funeral.
The few times he emailed her, all he could do was talk trash about me, so she cut him off.
But I'm the asshole.
Anywho, it took me a long time to realize & embrace the fact that my daughter knows the truth and that is all I care about.
His thoughts on the subject are irrelevant.
I know how hard it is to let go of that. Just remember that your son knows the truth. That is truly all that matters.
There is NO need to have that “one last conversation” with a toxic individual in your life.” The closure will come when you look deeper inside yourself. It’s not your job to fix someone when they are unwilling to fix themselves.
LittleRussian ( member #36658) posted at 1:10 PM on Wednesday, October 21st, 2020
Yes, I've got one of them too. 2 out of the 3 have nothing to do with him. The fact that he spent about 3 years ignoring them before we split and this is the result of it doesn't seem to have registered with him.
Me - firmly middle aged
Him XH - slightly younger (but not much!)
3 young adult children
The1stWife ( Guide #58832) posted at 6:03 PM on Wednesday, October 21st, 2020
Of course it’s your fault 
Tell the X you also started the COVID-19 epidemic too.
Survived two affairs and brink of Divorce. Happily reconciled. 12 years out from Dday. Reconciliation takes two committed people to be successful.
StillLivin ( member #40229) posted at 8:28 AM on Thursday, October 22nd, 2020
After getting worked up every time xhole blamed me for stupid shit that was entirely his fault, my give a fuck finally broke. I think it took about a year after Dday. He was such low hanging fruit that I couldn't remember anymore why I cared what he thought. I will keep my fingers crossed that the same will soon happen to you. Now, he could scream, cuss, and blow a gasket and i would probably just laugh in his face and hang up...oh wait, he's blocked now.
"Bitch please a good man can't be stolen." ROFLMAO - SBB: 7/2/2014
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