The1stWife ( Guide #58832) posted at 3:39 PM on Saturday, November 15th, 2025
Hoping these past few days have brought some peace into your life.
Even eliminating the back and forth with Mr Cheater hopefully brings a good deal of calmness in your day to day.
Survived two affairs and brink of Divorce. Happily reconciled. 12 years out from Dday. Reconciliation takes two committed people to be successful.
nrtd ( new member #86627) posted at 6:12 AM on Sunday, November 16th, 2025
Big hugs, stay strong. This is the worst but you're doing great!
Missmee (original poster member #86349) posted at 6:50 AM on Tuesday, November 18th, 2025
Still in the same position unfortunately. So he begged for forgiveness said all the right things etc… he has a new job lined up and has took a few weeks leave until the new one starts. BUT he will not block and delete her number and won’t allow me access to the phone.
So here is my new plan, I’m going to save as much money as I can to come out of the property and start a fresh. I’m focusing on the children and not falling into anything he says. Legal advice basically was I can apply to court to have the house just in my name but will take weeks maybe months because of backlogs and no immediate danger. I have started this process getting all the evidence entered but am yet to finish, I didn’t realise I had so much. I’m certain he’s having some kind of mid life crisis. I’m certain he will still end up back with the OW it’s just a matter of time.
But I’m riding it all out and feeling really positive, that’s both if I end up staying in the house or getting a new place. I know exactly where the path leads to just unsure which one it is yet and I’m happy either way that 
The1stWife ( Guide #58832) posted at 11:41 AM on Tuesday, November 18th, 2025
I’m hopeful that you have a plan that will give you some financial stability for your future.
The only thing that is troublesome is that you have to live with him (because he’s so unpredictable) at this point.
Please read up on the 180. That is where you emotionally separate yourself from him so that if the OW is still in the picture you are not bothered or upset or crying on the floor. If you see he’s still texting her, it only has a small impact on you.
If he becomes abusive to you on a continued basis, how will you manage that? No one wants to see you being treated badly as that will make you feel worse about yourself. And you deserve better than that.
Do you have a time limit if he continues to lie and cheat as to how long you will remain in this situation?
Hoping for the best for you.
Survived two affairs and brink of Divorce. Happily reconciled. 12 years out from Dday. Reconciliation takes two committed people to be successful.
