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Newest Member: DCS72

Just Found Out :
New to the community of the broken hearted

Topic is Sleeping.
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fareast ( Moderator #61555) posted at 11:04 AM on Tuesday, November 7th, 2023

Feeling relief is normal as you take control and realize the weight of her betrayal and behavior you were carrying. I would advise not to engage with her.
Follow your attorneys advice. Has she been served D papers yet? Besides the D you may also have legitimate legal claims against her for damaging your business and misappropriating funds. Become a gray rock in your dealings with her. Good luck.

Never bother with things in your rearview mirror. Your best days are on the road in front of you.

posts: 3951   路   registered: Nov. 24th, 2017
id 8814248
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 faithfulache (original poster new member #84049) posted at 7:39 AM on Sunday, November 12th, 2023

Sorry everyone for not providing an update. I've been pretty bummed. My STD results came back and all were negative, except one, which was inconclusive. Now I have to go for even more tests. The doctor said that I have a 50/50 chance of testing positive/negative, but the test was not negative because antibodies were detected.

I feel like the clich茅 of worst case scenarios. At this point, I feel like forgetting everything and becoming a monk. Has anyone dealt with positive STD results and what ended up happening? Public health is going to get involved but she's in another state, so not sure if they are going to find her.

This really pisses me off too because now I am going to be "damaged goods." Am sure no one is going to want a relationship that starts off with a whole spiel about how I have a STD. PS, it's not one of those take a course of anti-biotic STDs either. It's a keeper.

I'm back to that state of shock phase. She literally ruined my entire life.

My only advice to those that are new here. Get a STD test ASAP. I didn't think this was possible, but guess what, it is!

posts: 22   路   registered: Oct. 26th, 2023
id 8814934
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VezfromTaz ( member #80815) posted at 8:12 AM on Sunday, November 12th, 2023

What an absolute ho bag.

posts: 137   路   registered: Sep. 1st, 2022
id 8814936
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The1stWife ( Guide #58832) posted at 9:34 PM on Sunday, November 12th, 2023

I am so sorry you had to receive this devastating news.

Virtual hug 馃

You need it.

Survived two affairs and brink of Divorce. Happily reconciled. 11 years out from Dday. Reconciliation takes two committed people to be successful.

posts: 14273   路   registered: May. 19th, 2017
id 8814970
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Tanner ( Guide #72235) posted at 10:51 PM on Sunday, November 12th, 2023

Oh so sorry Brother, infidelity is the worst thing without an STD, she has possibly sentenced you to life. This level of abuse should be a crime.

Dday Sept 7 2019 doing well in R BH M 32 years

posts: 3613   路   registered: Dec. 5th, 2019   路   location: Texas DFW
id 8814981
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Justsomeguy ( member #65583) posted at 3:21 AM on Tuesday, November 14th, 2023

Hey OP. Just wanted to chime in and give you hope in terms of the possibility. I have a friend who was gifted a perminant STD from a cheating partner. She's been on anti-virals and has managed to be symptom free and had a robust sexual life, never infecting any partners. And I mean robust.

In fact, I think the data shows that about 20% of adults carry it and don't know. From my reading, and I've done a lot, it was once considered a nuisance problem, rather than having the stigma it does today. I think a pharmaceutical company was sourced out as the culprit on that one. Go figure.

Anyway, not trying to minimize your situation. Just trying to bring a little hope here. Forgive me if I overstepped.

I'm an oulier in my positions.

Me:57 STBXWW:55 DD#1: false confession of EA Dec. 2016. False R for a year.DD#2: confessed to year long PA Dec. 2 2017 (was about to be outed)Called it off and filed. Denied having an affair in court papers.

Divorced

posts: 1875   路   registered: Jul. 25th, 2018   路   location: Canada
id 8815076
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GreyGhost ( new member #83989) posted at 11:14 PM on Thursday, November 16th, 2023

FaithfulAche,

I have visited this forum for years yet never posted, upon reading your story, I feel compelled. I had been married almost 10 years, we had two children, 4 year old daughter and 18 month old son. My wife was a stay at home mom. Friday evening I was preparing to head home from work when I received a phone call that someone needed to meet me in a parking lot on the other side of town, this was not unusual in my line of work. I arrive and am served divorce papers, TOTAL shock, I had ZERO clue. I get home, house is pretty much cleaned out, she and the kids are gone, I have no idea where. Her father had the audacity to call me, inform me not to bother looking for them, I would not find them. She was the mom and they "belonged to her". To describe it as panic mode is an understatement. Now, my wife paid all the bills. I investigate, she has not made the house payment in 6 months, same with the car. Nor the phone bill (my cellular actually got shut off that night for lack of payment, electricity, insurance, well you get the idea, nothing. I check bank accounts, EVERYTHING has been pulled out, including our children鈥檚 college fund. Literally nothing left. She had concocted this for 6 months and harbored every Penny to keep for herself. I began digging, discovered she had a PO Box and had opened credit cards under assumed names. WHO is this person? As you referenced earlier, can it get worse? Yes, and it did, repeatedly. I had to keep digging, protect myself, many of the financial moves you have already made. They were missing for two weeks before I could get in front of a judge who demanded the children be returned to me that day. He stated I could remain in the house, and have the children with me for two weeks straight before the house would be returned to her, I would have to get an apartment and 50/50 temporary custody orders. That evening when my wife arrived to return the children, ready for what she said?

How could YOU do this to ME? Where am I supposed to live for the next two weeks?!? That鈥檚 when I first began reading up on narcissistic disorder, and as a previous poster stated once the scales from my eyes were removed I realized she had it in SPADES. It was not easy getting through it, I didn鈥檛 even have a spoon when I left the house and a metric ton of debt, and zero in the bank. I think you are way ahead of me being so pro active. One month I ate 60 pounds of baking potatoes for food, it鈥檚 all I could afford. I can go on for days about so many additional discoveries and hardships. Why do I tell you all this? That happened 22 years ago, I have since been married to the most beautiful, loving woman in the world for 17 years. I have NEVER been happier, we are financially extremely sound, and have the best life ever. There will be struggles, but you will get through this, there is a light at the end of the tunnel, and I promise it is NOT an oncoming train

posts: 6   路   registered: Oct. 11th, 2023
id 8815368
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Superesse ( member #60731) posted at 4:49 AM on Tuesday, November 28th, 2023

FaithfulAche, I hope you are doing as well as possible! Been checking on you.

posts: 2211   路   registered: Sep. 22nd, 2017   路   location: Washington D C area
id 8816469
Topic is Sleeping.
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