I found an atty who did my first consultation for $100.00. Even if you have to pay up to $250 or so, it’s totally worth it. Even a free consultation is ok, but an hour or so is really worth it.
The first atty I saw (xh had moved out for other reasons supposedly), said that I was getting more each month than the courts would give me, so just wait it out as long as possible. He said we could do an easy divorce for about $500, if he could get us to agree on everything and he would only ask for what is usually granted in my area courts.
When I finally realized my H was cheating, I went to a different atty I was referred to, just to get info. He actually laid out what he thought would benefit me the most and we filed. My xh got a lawyer and both lawyers didn’t want a court fight bc we didn’t have that much $, lol. So it got worked out between the attys in a settlement conference. (Both parties in different rooms the attys go back and forth helping each person to get some of what they want.) Then you get a court time and go in front of the judge and he grants the divorce.
They attys are not going to pressure you in any way. They just advise you on what they can do for you and how it works in your state. Then you can take your time, with facts.
I’m wondering if in your state they have a legal separation option. In my state they do have a legal separation, and have an equitable distribution of 401k money, one person buys the other out of the property or it is sold, and there is lifetime alimony. Since you’ve been married 10 years, you can file on his Social Security if he’s 62, and possibly get more than on your own.
I think just meeting with an atty (maybe a female one?) will give you lots of answers and no pressure.
[This message edited by homewrecked2011 at 3:09 AM, Sunday, April 16th]
Sometimes He calms the storm. Sometimes He lets the storm rage, but calms His child. Dday 12/19/11I went to an attorney and had him served. Shocked the hell out of him, with D papers, I'm proud to say!D final10/30/2012Me-55