Cookies on SurvivingInfidelity.com®

SurvivingInfidelity.com® uses cookies to enhance your visit to our website. This is a requirement for participants to login, post and use other features. Visitors may opt out, but the website will be less functional for you.

more information about cookies...

Return to Forum List

Return to Divorce/Separation

SurvivingInfidelity.com® > Divorce/Separation

You are not logged in. Login here or register.

He's ramping up and I'm scared

Pages: 1 · 2

crazyblindsided posted 8/20/2020 20:21 PM

I spoke with the lawyer just now and she said we shouldnít have to do any mediation and all I have to do is file. Itís a telephone consultation due to the current COVID situation. So I guess she will be my lawyer Feeling much better about tomorrow now and that I donít even need to involve him. Will let you all know how it goes.

pinkpggy posted 8/20/2020 21:07 PM

I'm glad you are getting out Sept 9th. I literally went through the same thing and had all my friends and family on standby and kept my phone on me at all times.

It's just been 7 days tomorrow since I left and life is so much better. Still getting the occasional nasty text but at least I don't have to look at him.

You will be breathing a sigh of relief soon enough. Hopefully the crazy won't ramp up the closer your move date gets.

[This message edited by pinkpggy at 9:08 PM, August 20th (Thursday)]

Adlham posted 8/20/2020 21:19 PM

Who told you that you didn't qualify for a restraining order?

If it wasn't a woman's shelter, I would encourage you to talk to them. This is their focus and they might have some obscure information that will qualify you for one.

Also, I just want to echo that right after you leave is the most dangerous time when it comes to his particular brand of crazy. I went through hell and back. Be prepared.

I am so sorry. Keeping you in my heart.

taken4granted posted 8/21/2020 08:39 AM

My lawyer suggested trying mediation to show that I was a team player, but being in the same room as my now ex, was terrifying. Thankfully, the mediator saw his agression and suggested I leave while he was in the bathroom at the end of our time. I literally ran for my car.

I believe getting a lawyer is your best option. Hopefully, he will get a new love interest soon and will leave you alone.

taken4granted posted 8/21/2020 09:04 AM

Oh... The other thing is be prepared for anything. My now ex tried to prove that I was crazy. He wrote up a whole long list of things that happened during the discovery part and said they were all crazy. Meanwhile, he was sending me love notes and begging me to cancel the divorce. I hope you spouse doesn't do these things, but when they are in this state of mind, anything goes.

My lawyer showed me all the motions he tried filing with the courts. In the end, he had to go through a court ordered psych evaluation. It got really ugly.

What I'm telling you is to document everything and be ready for battle. He will become someone you don't recognize. Friends of mine suggested I get a gun when he kept coming back to the house and leaving gifts for the kids or me. And I got a home security system at that time.

I'm not telling you this to scare you, but it can be a really scary uncertain time. And in the end, you need to take care of you.

crazyblindsided posted 8/21/2020 12:53 PM

Hi the telephone consultation went really well and it seems STBX isn't fighting me on anything he just keeps saying he just wants his wife back which brings me to this thought...

Hopefully, he will get a new love interest soon and will leave you alone.

I am literally praying for this right now and I never thought I would ever say that.

Who told you that you didn't qualify for a restraining order?

The police told me this that I need to be outright threatened through text or verbally. I'm not feeling as scared as I was before STBX seems defeated, but doesn't mean he won't ramp up again. I'm definitely keeping both eyes wide open.

Pages: 1 · 2

Return to Forum List

Return to Divorce/Separation

© 2002-2021 SurvivingInfidelity.com ®. All Rights Reserved.     Privacy Policy