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I am tired and just need to share.

freetogonow posted 12/23/2019 21:34 PM

I have five dogs.

One is blind, toothless and is in kidney failure. I have to hand feed her twice a day, her special kidney diet food. She won't eat her food unless I sit with her and give it to her tiny bit by tiny bit (she's a Chihuahua).

She sleeps a lot but she's otherwise a spry little dog and it's not her time yet. She is one of my foster dogs but she's not considered adoptable. She's a hospice case but I've had her for two years and she's not dead yet. I love her so I hope she has a long ways to go yet.

I have another foster dog. Also considered not adoptable, rescued from the streets and he'll live with me for his life. He is elderly and toothless, also sleeps a lot, but is in otherwise good health. He is missing half his lower jaw and struggles to feed himself. So I am hand feeding him twice a day as well. He eats eagerly and has a great appetite.

I have three more dogs that thankfully aren't as much work.

I currently have a sixth dog who is a foster as well for the rescue that I foster for. His foster owners are on vacation so I agreed to take him for a week.

This dog I'm babysitting, ho boy. He's a mess.
He's blind and deaf and elderly. He's on all kinds of meds. He gets up in the middle of the night to pee so my sleep is seriously disrupted. I woke up today feeling hung over as hell. If he wakes up and thinks he's alone, he cries and I have to try and comfort him as best I can.

I am self employed and work from home. I am working my ass off to get my business ramped up to where I want it to be. I have goals, plans, and needs---like a new roof on both my house and my guest house. So, I'm working as much as I possibly can to earn as much as I possibly can.

I get up at 7am and I hit the ground running. Feeding two dogs by hand before work, making sure everyone else gets out to do their business. I work my ass off all day taking care of my business and my dogs.

I am usually done working by around 5. Then I have to feed the two dogs by hand again, do dishes and laundry and housecleaning, run whatever errands need to be run, and all that. It's been raining here so the dogs get my sheets all gritty so I'm changing bed sheets daily. I'm on laundry overload.

It's now 7:30 and I've still got dishes and laundry to do and I'm making a batch of food for the second foster dog from scratch. What can I say, he's spoiled. He likes salmon and rice mixed with canned dog food. He needs to put on weight so that's what I feed him.

I don't have time to date or for a boyfriend. I don't even know if I want one. I'm just tired. My days are packed full, I don't have time to add one more thing to them.

I don't really feel like I'm complaining. The life I have is the life I've built. I do with my time what matters to me.

I'm just tired. And I needed to tell someone I'm tired.

WhoTheBleep posted 12/23/2019 21:44 PM

I'm here. And I hear you.

You are doing good things. Caring for needy animals and building your business. These are good reasons to be tired. You do have a full life! (((Hugs)))

freetogonow posted 12/23/2019 22:26 PM

Thank you Bleep. You're a sweetheart.

I got up after making this post. I did my dishes and cleaned up the kitchen, folded and put away the laundry, refilled the dogs water dishes and started another load of wash. I also got my tool kit out and tightened a loose drawer pull that was bugging me.

I'm going to finish making the homemade dog food for my toothless wonder, put the dogs out one last time for the night, change my sheets, and go to bed.

sassylee posted 12/24/2019 00:26 AM

Youíre doing such a service for those dogs. Itís sounds like you love them dearly. I hope 2020 sees your business thriving and new roofs on your buildings!

northeasternarea posted 12/24/2019 07:10 AM

Please get some rest. (((Hugs)))

crazyblindsided posted 12/24/2019 10:34 AM

Hope you get some much needed rest. You are amazing taking care of those dogs. What a blessing you are in their lives.

DevastatedDee posted 12/26/2019 08:55 AM

Bless you, you are one of my people. 5 dogs here too. None are elderly and need that kind of help yet, but as most didn't come from the best environments, they are a bit quirky (Chihuahuas that have been abused/neglected are something else...couple of lunatics). I work from home a good amount of the time too and I relate to the "get up and do all the dog things so I can log in and be productive" challenge. As I need extra income post-marital implosion, I also work part time on weekends at an animal shelter, a lot of it working to rehabilitate dogs from bad situations. I came home last Sunday in all kinds of pain from lifting one dog who had surgery for hip dysplasia and carrying traumatized Australian Shepherds around because they're too scared to walk. I feel you on tired and I hear you. Luckily, the creatures that exhaust us are also the ones who give us such love back. Like you, I wouldn't change it for the world.

My dad says I have replaced men with extra dogs, lol. That's okay with me for the time being. I won't likely find a man as loyal and loving as dogs anyway.

3rdstrike posted 12/29/2019 14:43 PM

For what it's worth, I didn't read a post of complaints. What I read was the pride, dedication and gratitude of a loving person who lives life on purpose...every day!

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